Dec 19, 2005 10:12
travis texted me. yep. i got a text saturday, but didnt know who it was from, so i texted back and asked who they were....they said to meet them @ jci and i'd find out, and said i couldnt and what was jci and who were they, and then he said James Coney Island (where he used to work) and some other stuff...
im freaking out. i had a mini panic attack, and even now, im scared shitless. i...i dont know what to do. this is the guy that stalked me for 5 months, put blood on my car, left me voicemails saying i couldnt escape him... this is the guy whose idol is marilyn manson... i havent heard from him since august, and now, he's starting it again?! why? why now? why do i have to do this again? im not just scared, im so sad...i just want to cry and cry. i cant do this again. i can live looking over my shoulder...having nightmares...having people constantly watch over me to make sure im safe...
have you ever felt like you're screaming on the inside, but you're too paralyzed to actually scream on the outside? thats what this feels like...