When I'm With You (I Have Fun)

[noonaofdarkness]

Title: When I'm with You (I Have Fun)
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Baekhyun/Chanyeol
Length: 58k
Genre: Romance, Slice of Life
Warning: Heavy social drinking, brief mentions of hazing, mentions of homophobia.
Summary: After a decade away, Baekhyun returns to his hometown to work in his family's kimbap shop. In walks Park Chanyeol, a familiar face from

Comments

RE: Hello! I'm sorry this is extra and long and late :(

[sebyun]

okay now i want to talk a little bit about baekhyun, thank you so so much for creating him! he and i share lots of worries and doubts it seems, we're also both closeted gay graphic designers looking for work and learning how to drive lmao. i think many people in their twenties could feel understood while reading this fic, i sure did, the part about him being scared and feeling stuck, but also being unable to send work applications despite desperately wanting a job - that's something that happened to me more than once. and then trying to live up to your parent's expectations your whole life, but never feeling like you're doing enough, having even your dreams affected by them and never being sure if you're doing something because you want it or because they told you you want it, and finally those horrible moments when you can see yourself becoming like them. all those things that baekhyun goes through, things that aren't just love problems but also personal issues like struggles with self confidence and searching for your own self make him much more than just some fic character? he's a 3d person, someone lots of your readers could probably relate to?
and i appreciate how you described homophobia here. mostly in fics there's usually lots of violence against queer characters either from the hands of their own family or from strangers. and then in other stories homophobia basically doesn't exist since the parents are accepting right away so it must mean all is well in the world. here you displayed it how it usually is to be gay, you're just scared because you never know if the people who smile at you every day would even spare you a glance if they knew. you're scared to tell your loved ones even though they care about you and probably wouldn't react badly but there will always be those what ifs in your head. and so you lose confidence and you become a bit untrusting and it might affect other areas of your life. i really love that chanyeol and baekhyun had a conversation about this, it was great to actually see 2 different points of view on the topic of homophobia and learning about their fears.
chanyeol in general is such an amazing man, i fell for him and would fight baekhyun to have him (i'm joking), as always you wrote him so well! i think he's actually the soul of gwangcheon, a good man who takes care of the ones he loves and someone who doesn't judge easily. i think anyone would want to stay in this little town if they met chanyeol and his friends. i was so happy that his coffee shop became successful. i also really appreciate that neither him or baekhyun ended up giving up on their dreams for love, they found a way to make it work and stay true to themselves.
chanyeol is actually one of many beautiful characters you presented here, each of them had their own soul, their own story, their own opinions and you even gave us an opportunity to glance into some of their lives which made this au even more rich and realistic.
lastly i would like to applaud your writing, it's clear to me that you're massively talented and that you've been developing as a writer lately, taking stylistic risks and trying things you've never did before and with each new story you shine brighter than before! this particular story was a bit poetic, with all the beautiful words and phrases you included here. the action flowed so smoothly and flawlessly, i never thought that something felt odd in the structure, on the contrary, a few times i had to stop to read a sentence or a paragraph again cause i was in awe and i wanted to marvel at the beauty of your style. i'm no specialist but even i can tell that this is very very well written. you keep reaching new levels and, i for one, cannot wait to see what future has in store for you and how your writing will develop with the new stories you create.

RE: Hello! I'm sorry this is extra and long and late :(

[sebyun]

in the end i would like to apologize for taking so much time to write a comment, i know how much feedback means to you and how important this story is, i felt guilty every time i was unable to make time to sit down and gather my thoughts. i promise i will get better at this and i will try to work at being a respectful reader as hard as you did on this story.
thank you SO MUCH for taking the time to write this and share with all your readers, it means the world to me that you did it, i was able to observe the process of your writing thanks to twitter and i know it wasn't easy for you, so i'm really happy that the final effect is so beautiful. i wish you all the best in life and in your writing career and if you go through any of the problems baekhyun did, i hope - just as him - you will find inner peace and happiness! thank you again <3