"i used to be a better man..."
my life is really weird right now. not bad, not good, not boring, not busy. just weird. its because i've set this goal for myself to move to portland in august. as a result, i'm in this weird state of limbo until it happens. the only thing i have to do between now and then is work and save money. its weird not having any other responsibilities or goals. i just feel like i'm floating along and counting down days. its actually rather boring. i can't go out during the week because of work, and by the weekend i'm so tired that all i want to do is be lazy.
it also has many other cons. the one that is most annoying is that i have way to much time to think now. that's never a good thing for me. i just end up over analyzing every situation in my life and as a result i end up really jaded towards whatever it is. i just don't care enough about anything anymore. i'm pretty much over everything in my life right now. i'm ready for something new and exciting. i'm sick of getting days confused in my memory because they are all so alike. i want something, anything, to catch me off guard. good or bad, i don't care. just different. but i doubt anything will. not because there aren't new and exciting things out there, but because i'm so fucking cynical about everything that it hurts. (well, "they" say cynical. i say realistic.)
oh, and fuck you and your non-logic. i'm sick of people trying to explain the most absurd things to me without using one shred of logic. that, in itself, is an illogical exercise. if you've got nothing better than "but i really like him/her" i don't want to hear it. if you can't logically justify the choices you make then they are probably the wrong ones. dumbasses.
it also has many other cons. the one that is most annoying is that i have way to much time to think now. that's never a good thing for me. i just end up over analyzing every situation in my life and as a result i end up really jaded towards whatever it is. i just don't care enough about anything anymore. i'm pretty much over everything in my life right now. i'm ready for something new and exciting. i'm sick of getting days confused in my memory because they are all so alike. i want something, anything, to catch me off guard. good or bad, i don't care. just different. but i doubt anything will. not because there aren't new and exciting things out there, but because i'm so fucking cynical about everything that it hurts. (well, "they" say cynical. i say realistic.)
oh, and fuck you and your non-logic. i'm sick of people trying to explain the most absurd things to me without using one shred of logic. that, in itself, is an illogical exercise. if you've got nothing better than "but i really like him/her" i don't want to hear it. if you can't logically justify the choices you make then they are probably the wrong ones. dumbasses.