As it is...
It's the day after Christmas which means it was a quiet day of rumination and peace...which both G and I desperately needed. We have been working hard and dealing with the lumps and a break is what we both took today. There was no major work involved in today other than dinner, and that didn't take all that much effort.
When I called my Dad today to wish him a Merry Christmas and thank him for the gift he gave us, I think he wanted me to compliment Margaret. I couldn't. If that makes me a bad person, so be it. She's very nice and I think she makes a nice match for my father. She is old before her time. She's only 48 but she acts more like a senior. She's a statistician. It was hard cuz it wasn't like it used to be. Mom was a bustler and Margaret was doing her own thing in Mom's kitchen and I struggled with that. Dad obviously likes her a lot. I don't know what to think about this.
Although I've had advice from people who've had divorced parents find new partners, it's not the same when you lose a parent and the survivor finds a new partner. It's a very unsettling experience. I don't say this to diminish the other...just to say that it isn't really comparable though it may seem to be. This isn't a choice. It's either this or to be alone because the one you loved and depended on died. Margaret has no children of her own. I didn't ask if she's ever been married before but I'll ask at some point, I'm sure. I'm more curious as to why if she hasn't ever loved someone.
We didn't do gifts this year. It was more important to be ahead of the minimum payment on credit cards. In the past year, we have shifted from a credit card dependent to a cash only lifestyle. We did it, but with a lot of sacrifice. We have what we need. The rest is gravy. Gravy is nice but it isn't necessary. I don't feel put out that we aren't rolling in presents and quite frankly, I'm glad that I'm not following my mother's example of stress and going further into debt to make one day of the year special. We still have more than enough and I know how blessed I am. I can't ask for more than that.
When I called my Dad today to wish him a Merry Christmas and thank him for the gift he gave us, I think he wanted me to compliment Margaret. I couldn't. If that makes me a bad person, so be it. She's very nice and I think she makes a nice match for my father. She is old before her time. She's only 48 but she acts more like a senior. She's a statistician. It was hard cuz it wasn't like it used to be. Mom was a bustler and Margaret was doing her own thing in Mom's kitchen and I struggled with that. Dad obviously likes her a lot. I don't know what to think about this.
Although I've had advice from people who've had divorced parents find new partners, it's not the same when you lose a parent and the survivor finds a new partner. It's a very unsettling experience. I don't say this to diminish the other...just to say that it isn't really comparable though it may seem to be. This isn't a choice. It's either this or to be alone because the one you loved and depended on died. Margaret has no children of her own. I didn't ask if she's ever been married before but I'll ask at some point, I'm sure. I'm more curious as to why if she hasn't ever loved someone.
We didn't do gifts this year. It was more important to be ahead of the minimum payment on credit cards. In the past year, we have shifted from a credit card dependent to a cash only lifestyle. We did it, but with a lot of sacrifice. We have what we need. The rest is gravy. Gravy is nice but it isn't necessary. I don't feel put out that we aren't rolling in presents and quite frankly, I'm glad that I'm not following my mother's example of stress and going further into debt to make one day of the year special. We still have more than enough and I know how blessed I am. I can't ask for more than that.