(no subject)
Sometimes I wonder why it is I have to have so much pain in my life at times. What I did to make it seem like I can't be happy.
Had a POA meeting early this morning, was completely tired and out of it. Sat with Whitney J. and realized how much we seem to be drifting apart.
Then to Deana's to chill and to southpoint for food. Got sick as hell came home and tried to get better. Brian came and hung out with me for a bit and cheered me up. Then we went to the mission for the show, was still sick for about half of it but Brian took care of me. Finally got better and tried to have some fun. Things were going alright and was having a good time. Then to southpoint for soda and such. Was alright, was kinda starting to get into a downer mood. Then Brian wanted to leave so went to leave, and got some bad news before I left. Then the ride home was a long talk with Brian. Ended up breaking down and crying to Brian about a bunch of crap. Most of it had nothing to do with the bad news. Found out that Brian and I have the same philosophy on life: Expect the worst scenerio in everything you do and you'll never be hurt. Was so nice and then bad to break down with Brian. Was nice because he's such a great guy to talk to and listens. But bad because I hate to cry. I absolutely hate it, I feel weak when I do. But I finally got to get stuff out, and it made me feel so much better to finally have someone to just listen to my problems and not try to tell me how to live my life to make it better. Never pay to see a therapist, just go see Brian. That's all I can say on that I guess. Well I'm tired and I just want to crash. Goodnight everyone
Had a POA meeting early this morning, was completely tired and out of it. Sat with Whitney J. and realized how much we seem to be drifting apart.
Then to Deana's to chill and to southpoint for food. Got sick as hell came home and tried to get better. Brian came and hung out with me for a bit and cheered me up. Then we went to the mission for the show, was still sick for about half of it but Brian took care of me. Finally got better and tried to have some fun. Things were going alright and was having a good time. Then to southpoint for soda and such. Was alright, was kinda starting to get into a downer mood. Then Brian wanted to leave so went to leave, and got some bad news before I left. Then the ride home was a long talk with Brian. Ended up breaking down and crying to Brian about a bunch of crap. Most of it had nothing to do with the bad news. Found out that Brian and I have the same philosophy on life: Expect the worst scenerio in everything you do and you'll never be hurt. Was so nice and then bad to break down with Brian. Was nice because he's such a great guy to talk to and listens. But bad because I hate to cry. I absolutely hate it, I feel weak when I do. But I finally got to get stuff out, and it made me feel so much better to finally have someone to just listen to my problems and not try to tell me how to live my life to make it better. Never pay to see a therapist, just go see Brian. That's all I can say on that I guess. Well I'm tired and I just want to crash. Goodnight everyone