(no subject)
I'm talking to my aunt in India for like an hour and I have such an urge to just break out and say "Auntie are u waiting to die too? Are you bored with life? Don't u miss your childhood? Doesn't the repetition of your daily life get to you? Have you found meaning? When you look into your daughters eyes what do you see? Working.. does it not bug you, does it not remind you of a useless living?" I could go on, so many things I want to ask but can't because it wont be approiate.
And yes I am still in my peaceful mode.
Smile smile smile theres reason for u not to, but theres also reason for u to. I had weird dreams. I was walking the world alone, absolutely alone (meaning deserted streets). and noticing all these temples and churchs everywhere, and smiling to myself. Than all of a sudden I was in this village with people, and I saved this baby girl from poison. and I took care of her, and she become my daughter. This beautiful beautiful little girl. And the entire village was evil with it's boys and poison flying from the sky, I had to protect her, keep her to myself, scream and harass those that tried to harm her. Than I met a man who I loved and married, and lived in his house. But his exwife wanted to kill me and my child. So me and the child had to run away. And that was basically it. But I'm remembering it and remembering the fact that I liked having that little girl look up to me, and me having to protect her. I liked being the adult for once. (and I had such wonderful dead sleep last night. I usually wake up several times in the night, but last night I was out of it.)
And yes I am still in my peaceful mode.
Smile smile smile theres reason for u not to, but theres also reason for u to. I had weird dreams. I was walking the world alone, absolutely alone (meaning deserted streets). and noticing all these temples and churchs everywhere, and smiling to myself. Than all of a sudden I was in this village with people, and I saved this baby girl from poison. and I took care of her, and she become my daughter. This beautiful beautiful little girl. And the entire village was evil with it's boys and poison flying from the sky, I had to protect her, keep her to myself, scream and harass those that tried to harm her. Than I met a man who I loved and married, and lived in his house. But his exwife wanted to kill me and my child. So me and the child had to run away. And that was basically it. But I'm remembering it and remembering the fact that I liked having that little girl look up to me, and me having to protect her. I liked being the adult for once. (and I had such wonderful dead sleep last night. I usually wake up several times in the night, but last night I was out of it.)