guess where I am!!!
at the library. of course.
I had the longest day ever. Woke up at about 8:30 to go and study some more for my World Lit Final at 11, got done with that at about 1:15 or so, then I went home and had lunch and then went to work for FOREVER. It was so busy, as I expected, but I didn't really mind that. I actually had a great time. I'm sure that the customers were annoyed, but I don't care...
I really enjoyed work tonight, and as Chris and I were locking up the furniture, I told him that I had an ecstatic feeling of freedom at that moment, for whatever reason. I just felt like I didn't have a care in the world. It was a beautiful moment, and I wanted to hold onto it forever.
Unfortunately, at the moment, I just feel tired and scatter-brained. I guess that's what eight hours of work after a very long exam can do to a person.
I think that the feeling of freedom that I experienced had to do with my accepting certain facts about myself and about life (physically, emotionally, socially, financially, psychologically, academically, etc). The fact that I'm terrified of being close with people. The fact that I'm not stable. The fact that I'm going to make it through all of this.
It's very easy for me (everyone) to get caught up in the moment of life. To be blinded to the big picture by circumstances. To not see the forest for all of the trees.
Do you see me? I'm a mess. and in the words of dr. scott, life is one big chocolate mess. (heaven help him) I'm a mess, but I'm doing pretty well. Every thing that is thrown at me only contributes to my character when I come out on the other side.
.
I guess it's the end of the semester. it's the end of the year. People are leaving. People are remembering. People are changing. People are growing up. And I'm growing up too. I just wanted to look back over the past year to see how much I've grown up. How much I've started to take responsibility for myself and my own actions. my own life.
But it is almost frightening (it is) to see how far I've got to go in the next year.
One More Year
I had the longest day ever. Woke up at about 8:30 to go and study some more for my World Lit Final at 11, got done with that at about 1:15 or so, then I went home and had lunch and then went to work for FOREVER. It was so busy, as I expected, but I didn't really mind that. I actually had a great time. I'm sure that the customers were annoyed, but I don't care...
I really enjoyed work tonight, and as Chris and I were locking up the furniture, I told him that I had an ecstatic feeling of freedom at that moment, for whatever reason. I just felt like I didn't have a care in the world. It was a beautiful moment, and I wanted to hold onto it forever.
Unfortunately, at the moment, I just feel tired and scatter-brained. I guess that's what eight hours of work after a very long exam can do to a person.
I think that the feeling of freedom that I experienced had to do with my accepting certain facts about myself and about life (physically, emotionally, socially, financially, psychologically, academically, etc). The fact that I'm terrified of being close with people. The fact that I'm not stable. The fact that I'm going to make it through all of this.
It's very easy for me (everyone) to get caught up in the moment of life. To be blinded to the big picture by circumstances. To not see the forest for all of the trees.
Do you see me? I'm a mess. and in the words of dr. scott, life is one big chocolate mess. (heaven help him) I'm a mess, but I'm doing pretty well. Every thing that is thrown at me only contributes to my character when I come out on the other side.
.
I guess it's the end of the semester. it's the end of the year. People are leaving. People are remembering. People are changing. People are growing up. And I'm growing up too. I just wanted to look back over the past year to see how much I've grown up. How much I've started to take responsibility for myself and my own actions. my own life.
But it is almost frightening (it is) to see how far I've got to go in the next year.
One More Year