Up, then shot right back down.
You want to talk, and I'm there. You don't and still, I'm there, hoping, waiting for you to open up, to trust in me, to depend on me. Through all this I am still waiting, waiting for you to do the same. I wait for you to be there when I need that help. I don't need to ask, I want you to know.
I hate missing people. I want to be my own person, to be able to depend on no-one else but myself; to be truly INDEPENDENT. Though I know that day may never come, I can imagine it, taste it, and feel how good that would be.
I don’t even understand you anymore, the one person who thought that you hadn’t changed, and now I think that I’m realizing it more than anyone else has. You’re not who I thought you were. I haven’t been able to see the things in you that I once did, the comforts that I once felt when you were around me. You've become what I hate, the person that I loathe. Why? Just by being yourself, and being everything that I've always wanted to be, but never will.
I hate missing you, I think about it and I start to realize how hard it’s going to be when you don’t come home. I need you here with me. I realize that this is the beginning of a life, separated by two different worlds. The beginning of your life, where I won’t be as important as I have always been. Where I become the sister, but not the little one that you always knew. You’re getting older and so am i. you’re learning life lessons, that soon I will learn too. But you are beginning to put them into play whereas I am just choosing where my future will take me, and you are there (in YOUR future), beginning to slide away from what I’ve always known.
You sound like ones that I know, the way that you talk, the way that you make me feel. I don’t mean to hurt you, that’s just the way I am, the way that I have learned to cope. Why bother involving you when that’s not necessary?
You’re not a disappointment, you never have been. I admire you, for so many things, and no matter what you do, you could never change the opinion I have of you. You're everything and more than I could have ever asked for. Even at 4:30 in the morning!
You don’t seem like the person I thought you were. I admired you so much and for a time, I wished so much that I could be you. Now, now you're different. You say things that we all really know you don't mean, just things to break the silence, and make the situation more comfortable for you. You don't have time for anyone anymore. We are all sitting here with our little lives, and the things you say make it seem like ours are never as important, like somehow we don't fit into your world.
I want to be that little girl again, the little girl that you loved. The little girl that you would just hold in your arms, and make everything okay again. The little girl that you could comfort, when it was easy to see that I’m hurting. This is childish, but I don't want to grow up in your eyes. I have been the one that has stayed young from then until now, so why change that?
I wish I knew what you expected from me, what you really wanted with me, without having to ask. I don't want to make things difficult, I just wish you didn't bother with me, that would make things a lot better. I don't think I can handle the pressures that you don't know that you provide. I don't want to make you think differently of me, nor do I want you to get the wrong impressions.
I wish that I could justify my choices with real excuses, to somehow make myself feel better about not taking action, but the truth is that I wish I had. I wish I had taken out the time to really get to know you, to see past what everyone thinks about you, to really discover the person inside of you, to make me feel like me again.
Goodbye, such a strong word, yet I find myself using it all the time. What if one day it were for real? What would you do, What would I do?
I hate missing people. I want to be my own person, to be able to depend on no-one else but myself; to be truly INDEPENDENT. Though I know that day may never come, I can imagine it, taste it, and feel how good that would be.
I don’t even understand you anymore, the one person who thought that you hadn’t changed, and now I think that I’m realizing it more than anyone else has. You’re not who I thought you were. I haven’t been able to see the things in you that I once did, the comforts that I once felt when you were around me. You've become what I hate, the person that I loathe. Why? Just by being yourself, and being everything that I've always wanted to be, but never will.
I hate missing you, I think about it and I start to realize how hard it’s going to be when you don’t come home. I need you here with me. I realize that this is the beginning of a life, separated by two different worlds. The beginning of your life, where I won’t be as important as I have always been. Where I become the sister, but not the little one that you always knew. You’re getting older and so am i. you’re learning life lessons, that soon I will learn too. But you are beginning to put them into play whereas I am just choosing where my future will take me, and you are there (in YOUR future), beginning to slide away from what I’ve always known.
You sound like ones that I know, the way that you talk, the way that you make me feel. I don’t mean to hurt you, that’s just the way I am, the way that I have learned to cope. Why bother involving you when that’s not necessary?
You’re not a disappointment, you never have been. I admire you, for so many things, and no matter what you do, you could never change the opinion I have of you. You're everything and more than I could have ever asked for. Even at 4:30 in the morning!
You don’t seem like the person I thought you were. I admired you so much and for a time, I wished so much that I could be you. Now, now you're different. You say things that we all really know you don't mean, just things to break the silence, and make the situation more comfortable for you. You don't have time for anyone anymore. We are all sitting here with our little lives, and the things you say make it seem like ours are never as important, like somehow we don't fit into your world.
I want to be that little girl again, the little girl that you loved. The little girl that you would just hold in your arms, and make everything okay again. The little girl that you could comfort, when it was easy to see that I’m hurting. This is childish, but I don't want to grow up in your eyes. I have been the one that has stayed young from then until now, so why change that?
I wish I knew what you expected from me, what you really wanted with me, without having to ask. I don't want to make things difficult, I just wish you didn't bother with me, that would make things a lot better. I don't think I can handle the pressures that you don't know that you provide. I don't want to make you think differently of me, nor do I want you to get the wrong impressions.
I wish that I could justify my choices with real excuses, to somehow make myself feel better about not taking action, but the truth is that I wish I had. I wish I had taken out the time to really get to know you, to see past what everyone thinks about you, to really discover the person inside of you, to make me feel like me again.
Goodbye, such a strong word, yet I find myself using it all the time. What if one day it were for real? What would you do, What would I do?