Beautiful, Depressed World
Being so far north, it is almost three pm and the sky looks like dusk. It has rained for 27 consecutive days here. I can look around like most northwest folks and see beauty and depression at the same time. The sky is half overcast, but in the depths of winter, everything is still green. I like it and I hate it.
Four weeks ago, I started taking anti-depressants and seeing a therapist. For reasons I will not go into here, I couldn't pull myself out of something that I had been in since October.
I have always been depressive. The doctors in March called it dysthymia, consistent low mood. It got worse after Yakima.
Some changes have made things better. I have changed jobs. I am in a combat unit now, so I feel safer if I go to war. Naomi and I are closer now, though we were never far apart before. I have more time to myself. And now I have a little white pill, brain medicine as I usually shout it every night, to make things better. The medicine has side effects, and I am coping with those. It hasn't had its full time to kick in, so maybe I will feel better. Today and yesterday, things just caught up.
I just thought I would admit all of this.
Four weeks ago, I started taking anti-depressants and seeing a therapist. For reasons I will not go into here, I couldn't pull myself out of something that I had been in since October.
I have always been depressive. The doctors in March called it dysthymia, consistent low mood. It got worse after Yakima.
Some changes have made things better. I have changed jobs. I am in a combat unit now, so I feel safer if I go to war. Naomi and I are closer now, though we were never far apart before. I have more time to myself. And now I have a little white pill, brain medicine as I usually shout it every night, to make things better. The medicine has side effects, and I am coping with those. It hasn't had its full time to kick in, so maybe I will feel better. Today and yesterday, things just caught up.
I just thought I would admit all of this.