hmmm
its been a while.
what up world. I am back and im really gonna start writing in this thing.
Since we last spoke, I was....i was....shit i don't remember, we'll just start from where I am right now.
I got a job at Dunkin Donuts. Now that seems funny right. In fact, I get the strangest reaction when i say it, and not from peers, but from adults and friends of my mom. I personally don't like it. I have learned how people react to certain things that they hear. I have also learned that people have this misconception about me. Well at least my moms company. And it seems that that reflection is being given off by my mom, and it somewhat of my own design. Basically thats my fault. I have made her believe that im somewhat of an elitist. I only do, associate, and hang out and work with certain people. This is soo not me. Most of my own faculty know me as a pretty roundabout kid who enjoy's EVERYONE's company. Im not someone who only wants to chill and enjoy life with everyone, but i consider myself the LAST person to be elitist. I just find it strange that someone might think that I would not work at a "low end" job. I personally don't care where i work right now, because im a college student who needs the dough. No matter tho.
Anyways I have been pretty much battling a decision in my life. I need to focus on a girl. I know I like plenty of ladies. Btw, this is a fucking HUGE journal entry so be prepared. There are exactly 3 ladies right now in the runnings...let me first make this know that I doubt any of them would actually go for me, but I just have a feeling about these women. Let me make something clear. This is NOTHING definite, and it honestly is just my speculation or what I think about in my head. SO herre goes...
There's Francesca. From the day I met her, and when tried to hook her up with my boy Lorenzo, I knew there was something special about her. She is Italian, and she has soo much love in her. I reconnected with her in the 10th grade and we dated for a few. I didn't work out, and honestly to this day, I have no idea why. Maybe I was not hip enough for her or I was too young (she is a year older than me). She's been a secret motivation for me to sort of mature and become a man. I've never really told her that either. Everytime I see her I feel so attracted to her. It is soo hard not to feel that way. I find her so attractive, and so genuine. She's a top contender for me. Her only downside is that sometimes when I speak to her, I never really get her to myself. I always get her with someone else. Its strange. Sometimes i feel like she knows i like her, and she kind of pushes me away. Im not sure. We'll see.
Then there's Molly. One thing about Molly that i LOVE is how dedicated she is to "making it". I really love how she is so driven in whatever she does. I always support her and I want her to know that. What I hate about her is that she always cautions me about how i don't call her, but she doesn't let me know how she really feels about me. I feel like she might like me, but she certainly is doing her. She isn't tryin to wait for anyone. Its funny because i've told her that if she said the word, I would dedicate myself to her (I probably have said that to many other ladies...eshhh) and I meant it. Really I have an issue with her not being able to possibly commit to me, mainly because I haven't really worked hard enough to call her and give her what she needs in order to make that commitment. Im still not sure if I did that, I would get the response I would want. I've known her since elementary school and I don't think anyone knows me better than her. Thats very comforting in a weird way.
Finally, there is Selena. I casually Joke with Selena about marying her, and she seems to concede with the joke. She REALLY doesn't know that im SO serious. The thing about Selena is that she has honestly a combination of the two ladies. She is very driven (just joined a major Latino sorority and undertook a 10 week pleging period), and shes very friendly and loving. I find her attractive and I love hanging out with her. We really started cliquing when started talking the summer after freshman year. Now we definitely have a habitual phone convo, and I love that. Its great to have someone you call who is a young lady and she's fine and you two just discuss life. She has a diverse tast in music like myself, and thats always good. I only wish she could also commit to me, but its alot harder for her, because of I dated someone she' was friends with...eshhh I hate that.
This has taken me alot to write about, but i feel like its worth it. We'll see how this thing is and how it goes. I hope the ladies who are invovled read this, and honestly i hope it brings some light to the situation.
off to work, take care...
what up world. I am back and im really gonna start writing in this thing.
Since we last spoke, I was....i was....shit i don't remember, we'll just start from where I am right now.
I got a job at Dunkin Donuts. Now that seems funny right. In fact, I get the strangest reaction when i say it, and not from peers, but from adults and friends of my mom. I personally don't like it. I have learned how people react to certain things that they hear. I have also learned that people have this misconception about me. Well at least my moms company. And it seems that that reflection is being given off by my mom, and it somewhat of my own design. Basically thats my fault. I have made her believe that im somewhat of an elitist. I only do, associate, and hang out and work with certain people. This is soo not me. Most of my own faculty know me as a pretty roundabout kid who enjoy's EVERYONE's company. Im not someone who only wants to chill and enjoy life with everyone, but i consider myself the LAST person to be elitist. I just find it strange that someone might think that I would not work at a "low end" job. I personally don't care where i work right now, because im a college student who needs the dough. No matter tho.
Anyways I have been pretty much battling a decision in my life. I need to focus on a girl. I know I like plenty of ladies. Btw, this is a fucking HUGE journal entry so be prepared. There are exactly 3 ladies right now in the runnings...let me first make this know that I doubt any of them would actually go for me, but I just have a feeling about these women. Let me make something clear. This is NOTHING definite, and it honestly is just my speculation or what I think about in my head. SO herre goes...
There's Francesca. From the day I met her, and when tried to hook her up with my boy Lorenzo, I knew there was something special about her. She is Italian, and she has soo much love in her. I reconnected with her in the 10th grade and we dated for a few. I didn't work out, and honestly to this day, I have no idea why. Maybe I was not hip enough for her or I was too young (she is a year older than me). She's been a secret motivation for me to sort of mature and become a man. I've never really told her that either. Everytime I see her I feel so attracted to her. It is soo hard not to feel that way. I find her so attractive, and so genuine. She's a top contender for me. Her only downside is that sometimes when I speak to her, I never really get her to myself. I always get her with someone else. Its strange. Sometimes i feel like she knows i like her, and she kind of pushes me away. Im not sure. We'll see.
Then there's Molly. One thing about Molly that i LOVE is how dedicated she is to "making it". I really love how she is so driven in whatever she does. I always support her and I want her to know that. What I hate about her is that she always cautions me about how i don't call her, but she doesn't let me know how she really feels about me. I feel like she might like me, but she certainly is doing her. She isn't tryin to wait for anyone. Its funny because i've told her that if she said the word, I would dedicate myself to her (I probably have said that to many other ladies...eshhh) and I meant it. Really I have an issue with her not being able to possibly commit to me, mainly because I haven't really worked hard enough to call her and give her what she needs in order to make that commitment. Im still not sure if I did that, I would get the response I would want. I've known her since elementary school and I don't think anyone knows me better than her. Thats very comforting in a weird way.
Finally, there is Selena. I casually Joke with Selena about marying her, and she seems to concede with the joke. She REALLY doesn't know that im SO serious. The thing about Selena is that she has honestly a combination of the two ladies. She is very driven (just joined a major Latino sorority and undertook a 10 week pleging period), and shes very friendly and loving. I find her attractive and I love hanging out with her. We really started cliquing when started talking the summer after freshman year. Now we definitely have a habitual phone convo, and I love that. Its great to have someone you call who is a young lady and she's fine and you two just discuss life. She has a diverse tast in music like myself, and thats always good. I only wish she could also commit to me, but its alot harder for her, because of I dated someone she' was friends with...eshhh I hate that.
This has taken me alot to write about, but i feel like its worth it. We'll see how this thing is and how it goes. I hope the ladies who are invovled read this, and honestly i hope it brings some light to the situation.
off to work, take care...