(no subject)
Oh I don't even know anymore.
My daily routine is anything but, and I don't know why my days, when left unchecked, always degrade to mindless, useless activities. Why can't I instead find that I've slipped into an extremely productive day/week/year?
Women. Eh. I spent Saturday with a group of assorted kids. Watched Phantom of the Opera (not bad), watched people play video games, ate fast food for the first time in... maybe 5 months, jello shots, mixed drinks, etcetera. Over-drank, but sans puke. Anyways, I'm not sure why but I always cringe when girls I don't really know start to get clingy and call me by pet names (I hate pet names anyways). I'm not sure if it's a matter of me not knowing the other person, or if I'm just not interested in them like that. Oh. I was a good kid - we didn't bang.
I could have gone out tonight, danced, and had a good time, but instead shot the whole day. As I said before it's been becoming much more common. More importantly is this feeling of just wanting to lay around and do absolutely nothing, and when that gets too boring to do only things which require absolute minimal effort (sleeping, tv, music, eating, etc). It's terrible. Terrible that I still haven't resolved it, and don't seem to be making any progress in doing so, that is.
So I'm applying for the job. Nevermind that I already have a better job - I just need some structure. I half-wonder if this is my only reason for seeking a stable relationship.
Oh, and fuck Valentine's day.
My daily routine is anything but, and I don't know why my days, when left unchecked, always degrade to mindless, useless activities. Why can't I instead find that I've slipped into an extremely productive day/week/year?
Women. Eh. I spent Saturday with a group of assorted kids. Watched Phantom of the Opera (not bad), watched people play video games, ate fast food for the first time in... maybe 5 months, jello shots, mixed drinks, etcetera. Over-drank, but sans puke. Anyways, I'm not sure why but I always cringe when girls I don't really know start to get clingy and call me by pet names (I hate pet names anyways). I'm not sure if it's a matter of me not knowing the other person, or if I'm just not interested in them like that. Oh. I was a good kid - we didn't bang.
I could have gone out tonight, danced, and had a good time, but instead shot the whole day. As I said before it's been becoming much more common. More importantly is this feeling of just wanting to lay around and do absolutely nothing, and when that gets too boring to do only things which require absolute minimal effort (sleeping, tv, music, eating, etc). It's terrible. Terrible that I still haven't resolved it, and don't seem to be making any progress in doing so, that is.
So I'm applying for the job. Nevermind that I already have a better job - I just need some structure. I half-wonder if this is my only reason for seeking a stable relationship.
Oh, and fuck Valentine's day.