Fic : The Gift of the Dioscuri - Anteros' birthday fic belated
This is a belated birthday fic for anteros_lmc and follows in time and universe directly after the scene in her fic A Year which she posted for Sir Edward's birthday earlier this Summer.
the opening conversation comes from a meeting on the Isle of Lewis between Alexander Carmichael and an unnamed hospitable woman and hee daughters who offer him refreshment when he is in Lewis collecting the old prayers and incantations and poems for his book Carmina Gadelica".
this is very PWP indeed - mostly conversation and even a little theological discussion-
but it does end with a little slash. The charcaters are movie verse, but the historical characters mentioned and the actions and letters between them are genuine and date from the ongoing channal fleet blockade in1797.
About 4,400 words
Rated: Largely gen and PG but a little slash here and there.
Charcters: Archie/Horatio, and Edward Pellew and Mr Bracegirdle
The Gift of the Dioscuri
“ But what have you at your weddings? How do you pass the time?”
“ Oh, the carles are on one side of the house talking of their crops and their nowt , and mayhap of the days when they were young and things were different. And the young men are on the other side of the house talking about boats , and sailing ,and militia and the naval reserve, perhaps of their own strength and many foolish things besides.”
The Gift of the Dioscuri
John Bracegirdle woke with the immediate and sickening feeling that he knew well; it meant that another nightmare had disturbed his sleep. It was ironic, he reflected, not for the first time, that it was not the height of battle or its aftermath which induced these unwelcome dreams but the excruciating tedium allied with constant watchfulness of blockade duty which always affected him this way.
He told himself that it would be politic at least to stay in his bed for a while longer but experience had shown that he would merely get more wakeful and more aches in his shoulders. He thought he would at least wander out into the wardroom. Not that there was anything he had not read- even three times over- in the small stack of books, but he might find something sufficiently numbing to send him off again. He became aware of two things - that the rain had ceased and the wind dropped considerably and, as he got to his feet and put on his dressing gown, realising that he had , uncharacteristically, fallen asleep in shirt and breeches without changing, he noticed a third thing - someone had left a lantern alight in the wardroom, or some other sleepless soul was there before him.
And so it was he found them - both fast asleep, despite the hardness of bed and chair . Horatio’s dark head resting on his folded arms , looking content in sleep despite the awkwardness of his perch and Archie, arms folded across his chest hugging to himself a little leather- bound book .
Bracey took in the coat flung aside, still damp and the discarded wrapping, the book not seen before and the wine in the centre of the table ( he raised an eyebrow at that and smiled) and reconstructed most of what had happened - except why had Horatio waited up until ..
It came to him then - a year since Ferrol, since their - homecoming -and he thought of the gifts of that year now past and of the emergence of courage, tenacity and grace in and through the two young men sleeping on undisturbed by his movement. He fetched a blanket from each of their beds and draped one ,with difficulty because of his head on the table top, around Horatio. Easing the book from Archie’s slackening grip which was about to send it cascading to the floor, he tucked the other blanket around the curled up form in the chair.
He located a folded piece of paper inside the back of the book and used it to mark Archie’s page and again smiled gently at sight of the book’s title, murmuring under his breath “ many waters cannot quench love”.
Finally he took the bottle and laid it on Archie’s bunk with care. Too risky to leave that out when even chasse marie vinegar was in short supply.
Sitting in the wardroom having now been ruled out he threw on his boat cloak and went on deck .He was adjusting his eyes to the night sky, stepping with care born of habit over coiled cable and deck rings , when a familiar voice, though quiet in the darkness, addressed him.
“ More blockade duty nightmares, Mr Bracegirdle? If my lord the Admiral continues to resent us It seems we are condemned to them a while yet.”
Bracegirdle joined his captain on the quarter deck . “ you had answer from Lord Spencer , then , sir?”
“ I have - all sympathy;but he says we are needed to keep the damned blockade effective , so no cruising for prizes- not even one- he knows we will do our duty, even in the face of knowing that there are others who are being given the freedom to chace by that unspeakable dolt of a man”.
Pellew shook himself, knowing it would not do merely to vent anger, which would be totally misdirected, against his worthy First , so asked - “ but what awakened you, John , you who are celebrated as one among us who ordinarily sleeps through all manner of things ?”.
Bracegirdle smiled a little tiredly - “ merely a bad dream and I thought I would find a well used book in he wardroom but instead I found the heavenly twins, both asleep where they sat . He went on to describe what he had just done , ending ‘ And I moved the bottle to the safety of Kennedy’s room - far too good to leave in temptations way. I suppose when I go below I shall perforce have to wake Hornblower at least - he has a watch to prepare for and a time in his own bed, however short , is better preparation than sleeping on the table top . ...
He caught an appraising but also warm look from Pellew and responded with a question in his face.
But the captain’s face adopted that uncertain slightly evasive look that indicated he felt caught out in some way.
At length he said, “ I was going to say you had all the right paternal instincts - and then i remembered your little one’s passing and how you---I am sorry, John, I did not intend to cause you distress. I know how you and Hannah have hoped ..
We have -but we lost little Hannah to the measles and then-well we have not been blessed again, but I think the time is past now - Hannah is not so young anymore ,and we ...well even if I got any shore leave I don’t think we would have any more luck than we have ever had. Not for us now - though Hannah is thinking that we will take on her youngest niece and nephew - her brother’s children. Their mother is not well and may not live, and their father was killed in that dockyard explosion at Chatham - but it is still a mystery to me why it was so with us . Not like your luck sir indeed !
Pelew inclined his head in recognition, but said nothing at all - fully aware that his own family, now numbering five with George growing all the time, must seem a distant mocking dream to his lieutenant .Georgy , whom he had barely seen, whom he had not seen learn to walk, or whose first word had not been “ papa “. Who had hidden in Susan’s dress at sight of the tall loud man who was so frightening . Susan had not forced the little boy to greet his father , she being far too wise, but her face had said it all... Suddenly he was far away from the cold waters off the Biscay coast in Winter and watching two little girls who had not yet learned that they were ‘hoydenish’ if they played at pirates with their brothers, all four cascading down the sloping beach towards him..
Damn this war that was attrition , bits and pieces , struggling to keep crews fed and well and half the time at the mercy of forces inimical and that was just the admiralty itself ! Damn it for keeping a good man like Bracey possibly from the chance of being a father and for making me a stranger to my own children, and for wasting the beauty and the vigour of those young men in prison cells...and yet...my Susan deserves to be Lady Pellew, and John and Hannah can send those nieces and nephews to good schools if we could but get a decent prize...
but to depend on death for life..to hope for joy through so much destruction. Can that be right?
He was stumped there, being ,as he well acknowledged- other than to midshipmen of course for whom he was outwardly omniscient,, no philosopher and no scholar.
For a while silence descended between the two officers standing against the rail. Pellew was watching the sky , which had cleared now of cloud cover and he stretched a hand up .gesturing towards the emergent stars - there, above Orion , to where Gemini’s two brightest stars were distinctly visible:
“ The heavenly twins - there they are . Watching over more sailors as they have done for thousands of years- was that what brought the name to mind - that we have been given a gift in those two ?
“ yes , I suppose in a way - although they must not think it anything other than more teasing I think.
Do you know the whole of the legend- or is there more than one? - You had a classical education did you not - were reading for Oxford before you joined the navy ? I so much regret, - though you have not heard me say this - how little schooling I ever had ,and , he laughed as he said it , how unrewarding a pupil I was in such schooling as was mine..I have tried since to read, but I am far behind the likes of you, John? Did you intend for the sea always then
Like Horatio, I was well gone 17 - my father’s trade ventures went awry and we lost a great deal - we all had to do what we could . And I loved the sea - it was no hardship, truly- though I would have wished it maybe a year later in coming to have had just a few days or a term at the university..
But the legend - there are more than one , you are right, though they are of a piece with one another . The ancient Babylonians called them the Great twins and thought of them as being Enkidu and his friend Gilgamesh, who fought together in many adventures. But we know them from Greek mythology - they were the children of Leda,
“She of the swan - in - disguise ?”
Bracey nodded- “ the very same - but one was the son of a mortal father and the other of Zeus, and therefore immortal”. They went everywhere together and were talented, brave and handsome - until one day Castor , mortal Castor, was killed . and immortal Pollux was so grief stricken that he begged to be able to go to Hades with his brother. Some say that immortality came as they both were turned into stars - and that they hold hands there in the heavens. Others say that Zeus allowed them to love between the two worlds Hades and Olympus.”
Silence again ensued while both men contemplated the tale and then at length Pellew spoke:
“A tremendous story -that almost unbearable moment of Pollux recognising that he must go on - and go on and there never be Castor again.” He shivered suddenly as if at a freak gust of cold wind and Bracegirdle too felt a coldness brush across his skin - what his sisters and grandmother had called ‘someone walking on your grave’ As if in unconscious reaction Pellew, scanned the whole visible deck but all was as orderly and calm as it had been. Bracey saw the narrowed gaze relax again.
"Would you care for a glass of brandy before trying to sleep again, Mr Bracegirdle?"
Bracegirdle was still recognising his chilled hands and smiled as he thanked the captain, then remembering , apologised for his incorrectly uniform state. “ be damned to that sir, no man cares more for a well turned out crew than I do ,as those two scapegraces will know, if they come on deck having slept in their clothes ..
He knew Bracegirdle would see to it that such a thing would not happen and moreover that Bracey was aware that the fierceness was mere posture. Conceding the point ,he added . we are indeed blessed to have among us the two most glorious lieutenants that his majesty’s navy can throw on board a frigate and I know well they could draw all eyes even in sackcloth - but that only redeems almost everything and I won’t have them thinking otherwise!
B ut there is a time and a place for elegance and half way through the night watches when off duty is not one of them. Come as you are John, for heaven’s sake!”
Bracey nevertheless felt slightly uneasy and inclined to stay in his boat cloak as he went to sit in the aft cabin, but his captain, having lit a few of the candles and put the decanter and glasses at his elbow, silently divested himself of cloak and coat and shrugged himself into his own dressing gown.
There , two ‘old men’ both more in comfort than in elegance, he said. and taking his glass raised it to greet his guest. Your health ,John, and Hannah’s , too and of those cubs she plans to take on .
Bracey’s round and ever- pink face deepened in hue.“ To all those at home , to your good Lady and all your youngsters.”
After a moment they both stirred again but Bracegirdle. as always. ceded the right to speak first to his captain .” and to Castor and Pollux” both the heavenly twins and the incarnation of them we have amongst us...may the former keep safe the latter..
“Oh ,I think the Dioscuri know that their appointed guardian does that well on their behalf .”
“Yes, John , but there will come a time ,,and if Bridport has his way it will be sooner rather than later there will come a time when...”.he let the sentence trail away, knowing he was understood.
“Tell me about - Gilgamesh and - his friend “
“Enkidu ? well its another tale to explain the cycles of the seasons sir .Gilgamesh fights and endures and all is well because Enkidu is at his side, - then his friend dies and he goes to the guardians of the underworld to beg for himself and his friend. But he too must die - to be reborn as the sun is reborn..”
“ this mortal must put on immortality” murmured Pellew, then
“Does that not seem strange - the notion that we should put on immortality? when as Christians we believe in one who shed his immortality for us ? That he might be as we are. Sometimes that frightens me John, what that demands of us.”
“ Sir, you will know already that I - do not in whole -part share your faith , much though I honour the man it has formed you. To be ...but there is much is true in what you say,. There is something profound there “ many waters cannot quench love “ - such truth in that - but for me it is also not quite right, for I have seen too much to make me not doubt.”
Pellew nodded ,though he was really caught up in his own thought too much to respond
“But ‘to be as we are’- yet he was so much than we are. I hear that like an accusation some times - you know, on deck after an action, and I am looking - lookingfor the faces that are gone or the bodies lying in those lakes of blood and, God help me, there are always some that one is praying hardest to see that they live .More than for the others. Even there in all that awful carnage when it should not beso, still our humanity - our care, our love falls short.”
Bracey thought of the careful penning of letters to widows and wives;the concern for their well-being; of the patient sitting beside deathbeds helping men make their last testament , accepting responsibility for their few treasure to get them home- He thought of the spending of prize money on a fitting funeral for an enemy captain, of trying to get his property sent home in the midst of a revolutionary war..and said to himself that there were ways and ways of falling short and his captain’s were judged by a standard few would pass - least of all his own self of course.
“But, sir, it would be true of us all - those two,Horatio and Archie, for instance, we all know - there is that about them - perhaps because they so self evidently would walk through hell itself could they but do it hand in hand - if we lost them...the entire ship more or less would be as you describe . for Kennedy’s courage in that damned gaol and his willingness to go back there because Horatio had promised, or of Horatio jumping aboard that blazing ship ...
There are some lives whose loss diminishes many because their presence enriches so many. And we are human - is it not obvious that you would look for Pownall’s face or Fleetwood’s - or Horatio’s ? It is only natural that we are affected so.”
“You are no doubt right and yet still it makes me anxious.
And when peace comes - what would you do? “ Asked Pellew.
“O I am too old for Oxford now but I could teach others to help them get there or in a coastal school both sailing skills and academic- maybe my nephew could do what was denied his uncle
“PleaseGod that I don’t have to go back to farming - no education you see , John, so it was all I knew - except I knew nothing at all, And damned wheat and barley - you go out one morning and you go the next and even the next and there is no change and nothing not a damned thing you can do to make it grow faster !
He was parodying himself and delighted that Bracegirdle saw it too -“ I see it sir , one can’t stand on quarter r deck and command them “ Grow”....surely you will always be needed- at least for a while There must always be a future for someone with your skill and daring - in a relative peace, supposing one ever comes.”
Pellew lifted his shoulders to stretch them -“ as I hope there will -but we must get you your due dessert before then, John, its about time you were a commander. He held one hand out as if to check Bracey’s inevitable demurral - which the latter then forbore to make.
But rising he said :And now I must go , if I may be dismissed sir - and you should rest, sir. After all, I have one - er - scapegrace to get on deck in a form presentable and another to coax to sleep when he has a book of biblical love letters and a bottle of good burgundy from his overly indulgent captain to gloat over..Good nig- good morning sir!
“Good morning Mr Bracegirdle ..and thank you.”
On his return to the wardroom his footsteps , though careful, disturbed the sleepers, or rather one of them - Horatio first, blinking groggily up from the mass of tumbled curls , the luminous brown eyes hazy with sleep and turning, with recognition, instantly anxious.
“As you were Mr Hornblower -or rather not quite as you were - it its still an hour to your watch- I suggest a short rest in your own bunk and a wash might help - I’ll go and see if there is such a luxury to be scrounged as a bowl of warm water.” He saw Horatio’s eyes widen as he took in the empty table with no bottle and smiled.” By the way ,,Mr Kennedy’s wine is safe I thought it had better not be left around - heaven knows what temptation the captain’s best burgundy puts in the way of even such upright citizens as the first lieutenant !
Horatio was unable to suppress one last glance at the figure which had contrived to curl even in a wardroom chair- it was Archie’s prison instinct to make himself as small a possible that sometimes still told in sleep and Horatio found himself still wracked by that even though he was well-a ware that the same body could sleep in languorous sprawl after they made love and on other days also tucked against his shoulder , confiding and peaceful. Then he turned and obediently went off to his quarters.
Bracegirdle, returning with the water- (almost no -one ever refused Bracegirdle anything - not for authority alone, but because he was so polite in the asking and kind in the thanking-) found himself regarded by a rather tousled Archie, who was once again clutching his book to himself. “Was it you, sir who brought me the blanket - thank you very much, and thank you for marking my place”- it occurred to him to look at the folded sheet Bracey had used as the marker.
Bracey replied “It was in the back cover - i thought perhaps you had put it there - though its too fine paper for naval use I see that now.”
Archie was unfolding the paper as Bracey was speaking, rather delighted o find his lovely gift had extra mystery. “ There’s a poem - a transcription of Gaelic it says here.” Made at Barvas”
He trailed after Bracegirdle book in hand - looking in the front “ Hey this book belonged to a William Kenned y in Ross- shire no wonder Lady Pellew thought it would do “ But its not so very long ago - poor man - perhaps he had to sell or perhaps he died. Horatio had asked if the captain could help to get me a book and Lady Pellew found this in a book dealers in Plymouth - do you think he joined up? Its his writing in the transcription
The Song of the Wooden - its in praise of sailors sir- maybe Lady Pellew saw this too..”
“Horatio ! listen,” and he charged on into the cabin where Horatio was in the act of undressing . Bracey deposited the bowl and departed, saying over his shoulder as he left. “Mr Hornblower, on deck and immaculate as may be before the bell please” and Mr Kennedy “Yes sir ? officers need to take care to be fit for duty - I want you asleep by the watch bell and in ( he bit back saying “ your own bed” ) and added instead “ and not in a chair this time!” “ Aye sir “
Bracey could in fact hear just the murmur of voices as he laid himself down, feeli
ng surprisingly content m and knowing that the few hours sleep he might get now would not likely be subject to nightmares.
"Horatio listen!
My treasure among the men of the oar banks
When thou wouldst go to thy boat
That was work that well became thee
The lads would be at the oar bank
thyself would be at thy boat’s helm
A champion -like, valiant powerful man..
‘S na hada hia hi’s na hi ho hua.
Its written about you !
Horatio was struggling to cope , between blushes at the intensity of Archie newly- awake like this and trying to pull on a clean shirt while Archie had quite other designs on his chest and back . He managed to grab the poem from Archie’s hand during a well timed distraction kiss. Succeeded - temporarily -in getting into his new shirt and, catching the gaze of delighted battle in Archie’s glowing face, went on reading :
My treasure and my ransom and my dower is
Young John son of James of the great round eyes
Blue is thine eye and it is no mockery..
...and mine own good wish to thee for thy safe coming...
“That verse is you, Archie - Ar-chie !”- but his protest against having his lower half washed with assistance was very token...
So it was that , in the end, with barely some five minutes to spare Mr Hornblower was indeed on deck and observed by Mr Bowles the master and of course reported to the Lieutenant and Captain later, to be very tidy. All the way from his brushed hat and damp curls to the rather shabby but nonetheless polished shoes. And he was smiling even as he thought no one watched him.
And Mr Kennedy was at least in his bunk though he was not asleep but almost; one hand still clutching the book ad its extra contents whose last verse he was reciting even as he fell fast asleep again.
My treasure and my ransom and my hoard
Beauty of hair grew richly upon thee
hair in luxuriant precious locks...
were I a bard I would make an oar song
were I a carpenter I would make a boat
here beside thee must I ever remain...
Notes :
The song that Archie and Horatio read is part of The Rowing song of the Wooden Galley which was collected by Carmichael from the notebooks of Malcolm ( Angus) McPhail, free church minister at Kilmartin, Argyle in the 1890s but who was born at Barvas, on Lewis. It had been notated by him listening to an old man on Lewis singing it The hero is said to be Iain Og Mac Sheumais, son of James McDonald of Castle Camus, according to the notes made by Carmichael. I have omitted a few lines from the stanzas quoted and some stanzas altogether and changed one word only .See Carmina Gadelica,Floris Books edition, 1994 pages 448-10.
The religious position of Edward Pellew is reltively consistent with the belief of a committed evangelical Christian of the late 18th early 19th century and thus with what he was known to be.=, although his deeper religious experiences and confession were mainly in the second half of his life. Bracegirdle represents the form of agnostic enlightenment thinking not inconsistent with some of the teachers he may have had , who were influenced by these trends. The details about the letter forbidding them to cruise for prizes and yet Lord Bridport’s allowing of this to other captains and about Lord Spencer’s letter are historically accurate, and date from the year 1797.
the opening conversation comes from a meeting on the Isle of Lewis between Alexander Carmichael and an unnamed hospitable woman and hee daughters who offer him refreshment when he is in Lewis collecting the old prayers and incantations and poems for his book Carmina Gadelica".
this is very PWP indeed - mostly conversation and even a little theological discussion-
but it does end with a little slash. The charcaters are movie verse, but the historical characters mentioned and the actions and letters between them are genuine and date from the ongoing channal fleet blockade in1797.
About 4,400 words
Rated: Largely gen and PG but a little slash here and there.
Charcters: Archie/Horatio, and Edward Pellew and Mr Bracegirdle
The Gift of the Dioscuri
“ But what have you at your weddings? How do you pass the time?”
“ Oh, the carles are on one side of the house talking of their crops and their nowt , and mayhap of the days when they were young and things were different. And the young men are on the other side of the house talking about boats , and sailing ,and militia and the naval reserve, perhaps of their own strength and many foolish things besides.”
The Gift of the Dioscuri
John Bracegirdle woke with the immediate and sickening feeling that he knew well; it meant that another nightmare had disturbed his sleep. It was ironic, he reflected, not for the first time, that it was not the height of battle or its aftermath which induced these unwelcome dreams but the excruciating tedium allied with constant watchfulness of blockade duty which always affected him this way.
He told himself that it would be politic at least to stay in his bed for a while longer but experience had shown that he would merely get more wakeful and more aches in his shoulders. He thought he would at least wander out into the wardroom. Not that there was anything he had not read- even three times over- in the small stack of books, but he might find something sufficiently numbing to send him off again. He became aware of two things - that the rain had ceased and the wind dropped considerably and, as he got to his feet and put on his dressing gown, realising that he had , uncharacteristically, fallen asleep in shirt and breeches without changing, he noticed a third thing - someone had left a lantern alight in the wardroom, or some other sleepless soul was there before him.
And so it was he found them - both fast asleep, despite the hardness of bed and chair . Horatio’s dark head resting on his folded arms , looking content in sleep despite the awkwardness of his perch and Archie, arms folded across his chest hugging to himself a little leather- bound book .
Bracey took in the coat flung aside, still damp and the discarded wrapping, the book not seen before and the wine in the centre of the table ( he raised an eyebrow at that and smiled) and reconstructed most of what had happened - except why had Horatio waited up until ..
It came to him then - a year since Ferrol, since their - homecoming -and he thought of the gifts of that year now past and of the emergence of courage, tenacity and grace in and through the two young men sleeping on undisturbed by his movement. He fetched a blanket from each of their beds and draped one ,with difficulty because of his head on the table top, around Horatio. Easing the book from Archie’s slackening grip which was about to send it cascading to the floor, he tucked the other blanket around the curled up form in the chair.
He located a folded piece of paper inside the back of the book and used it to mark Archie’s page and again smiled gently at sight of the book’s title, murmuring under his breath “ many waters cannot quench love”.
Finally he took the bottle and laid it on Archie’s bunk with care. Too risky to leave that out when even chasse marie vinegar was in short supply.
Sitting in the wardroom having now been ruled out he threw on his boat cloak and went on deck .He was adjusting his eyes to the night sky, stepping with care born of habit over coiled cable and deck rings , when a familiar voice, though quiet in the darkness, addressed him.
“ More blockade duty nightmares, Mr Bracegirdle? If my lord the Admiral continues to resent us It seems we are condemned to them a while yet.”
Bracegirdle joined his captain on the quarter deck . “ you had answer from Lord Spencer , then , sir?”
“ I have - all sympathy;but he says we are needed to keep the damned blockade effective , so no cruising for prizes- not even one- he knows we will do our duty, even in the face of knowing that there are others who are being given the freedom to chace by that unspeakable dolt of a man”.
Pellew shook himself, knowing it would not do merely to vent anger, which would be totally misdirected, against his worthy First , so asked - “ but what awakened you, John , you who are celebrated as one among us who ordinarily sleeps through all manner of things ?”.
Bracegirdle smiled a little tiredly - “ merely a bad dream and I thought I would find a well used book in he wardroom but instead I found the heavenly twins, both asleep where they sat . He went on to describe what he had just done , ending ‘ And I moved the bottle to the safety of Kennedy’s room - far too good to leave in temptations way. I suppose when I go below I shall perforce have to wake Hornblower at least - he has a watch to prepare for and a time in his own bed, however short , is better preparation than sleeping on the table top . ...
He caught an appraising but also warm look from Pellew and responded with a question in his face.
But the captain’s face adopted that uncertain slightly evasive look that indicated he felt caught out in some way.
At length he said, “ I was going to say you had all the right paternal instincts - and then i remembered your little one’s passing and how you---I am sorry, John, I did not intend to cause you distress. I know how you and Hannah have hoped ..
We have -but we lost little Hannah to the measles and then-well we have not been blessed again, but I think the time is past now - Hannah is not so young anymore ,and we ...well even if I got any shore leave I don’t think we would have any more luck than we have ever had. Not for us now - though Hannah is thinking that we will take on her youngest niece and nephew - her brother’s children. Their mother is not well and may not live, and their father was killed in that dockyard explosion at Chatham - but it is still a mystery to me why it was so with us . Not like your luck sir indeed !
Pelew inclined his head in recognition, but said nothing at all - fully aware that his own family, now numbering five with George growing all the time, must seem a distant mocking dream to his lieutenant .Georgy , whom he had barely seen, whom he had not seen learn to walk, or whose first word had not been “ papa “. Who had hidden in Susan’s dress at sight of the tall loud man who was so frightening . Susan had not forced the little boy to greet his father , she being far too wise, but her face had said it all... Suddenly he was far away from the cold waters off the Biscay coast in Winter and watching two little girls who had not yet learned that they were ‘hoydenish’ if they played at pirates with their brothers, all four cascading down the sloping beach towards him..
Damn this war that was attrition , bits and pieces , struggling to keep crews fed and well and half the time at the mercy of forces inimical and that was just the admiralty itself ! Damn it for keeping a good man like Bracey possibly from the chance of being a father and for making me a stranger to my own children, and for wasting the beauty and the vigour of those young men in prison cells...and yet...my Susan deserves to be Lady Pellew, and John and Hannah can send those nieces and nephews to good schools if we could but get a decent prize...
but to depend on death for life..to hope for joy through so much destruction. Can that be right?
He was stumped there, being ,as he well acknowledged- other than to midshipmen of course for whom he was outwardly omniscient,, no philosopher and no scholar.
For a while silence descended between the two officers standing against the rail. Pellew was watching the sky , which had cleared now of cloud cover and he stretched a hand up .gesturing towards the emergent stars - there, above Orion , to where Gemini’s two brightest stars were distinctly visible:
“ The heavenly twins - there they are . Watching over more sailors as they have done for thousands of years- was that what brought the name to mind - that we have been given a gift in those two ?
“ yes , I suppose in a way - although they must not think it anything other than more teasing I think.
Do you know the whole of the legend- or is there more than one? - You had a classical education did you not - were reading for Oxford before you joined the navy ? I so much regret, - though you have not heard me say this - how little schooling I ever had ,and , he laughed as he said it , how unrewarding a pupil I was in such schooling as was mine..I have tried since to read, but I am far behind the likes of you, John? Did you intend for the sea always then
Like Horatio, I was well gone 17 - my father’s trade ventures went awry and we lost a great deal - we all had to do what we could . And I loved the sea - it was no hardship, truly- though I would have wished it maybe a year later in coming to have had just a few days or a term at the university..
But the legend - there are more than one , you are right, though they are of a piece with one another . The ancient Babylonians called them the Great twins and thought of them as being Enkidu and his friend Gilgamesh, who fought together in many adventures. But we know them from Greek mythology - they were the children of Leda,
“She of the swan - in - disguise ?”
Bracey nodded- “ the very same - but one was the son of a mortal father and the other of Zeus, and therefore immortal”. They went everywhere together and were talented, brave and handsome - until one day Castor , mortal Castor, was killed . and immortal Pollux was so grief stricken that he begged to be able to go to Hades with his brother. Some say that immortality came as they both were turned into stars - and that they hold hands there in the heavens. Others say that Zeus allowed them to love between the two worlds Hades and Olympus.”
Silence again ensued while both men contemplated the tale and then at length Pellew spoke:
“A tremendous story -that almost unbearable moment of Pollux recognising that he must go on - and go on and there never be Castor again.” He shivered suddenly as if at a freak gust of cold wind and Bracegirdle too felt a coldness brush across his skin - what his sisters and grandmother had called ‘someone walking on your grave’ As if in unconscious reaction Pellew, scanned the whole visible deck but all was as orderly and calm as it had been. Bracey saw the narrowed gaze relax again.
"Would you care for a glass of brandy before trying to sleep again, Mr Bracegirdle?"
Bracegirdle was still recognising his chilled hands and smiled as he thanked the captain, then remembering , apologised for his incorrectly uniform state. “ be damned to that sir, no man cares more for a well turned out crew than I do ,as those two scapegraces will know, if they come on deck having slept in their clothes ..
He knew Bracegirdle would see to it that such a thing would not happen and moreover that Bracey was aware that the fierceness was mere posture. Conceding the point ,he added . we are indeed blessed to have among us the two most glorious lieutenants that his majesty’s navy can throw on board a frigate and I know well they could draw all eyes even in sackcloth - but that only redeems almost everything and I won’t have them thinking otherwise!
B ut there is a time and a place for elegance and half way through the night watches when off duty is not one of them. Come as you are John, for heaven’s sake!”
Bracey nevertheless felt slightly uneasy and inclined to stay in his boat cloak as he went to sit in the aft cabin, but his captain, having lit a few of the candles and put the decanter and glasses at his elbow, silently divested himself of cloak and coat and shrugged himself into his own dressing gown.
There , two ‘old men’ both more in comfort than in elegance, he said. and taking his glass raised it to greet his guest. Your health ,John, and Hannah’s , too and of those cubs she plans to take on .
Bracey’s round and ever- pink face deepened in hue.“ To all those at home , to your good Lady and all your youngsters.”
After a moment they both stirred again but Bracegirdle. as always. ceded the right to speak first to his captain .” and to Castor and Pollux” both the heavenly twins and the incarnation of them we have amongst us...may the former keep safe the latter..
“Oh ,I think the Dioscuri know that their appointed guardian does that well on their behalf .”
“Yes, John , but there will come a time ,,and if Bridport has his way it will be sooner rather than later there will come a time when...”.he let the sentence trail away, knowing he was understood.
“Tell me about - Gilgamesh and - his friend “
“Enkidu ? well its another tale to explain the cycles of the seasons sir .Gilgamesh fights and endures and all is well because Enkidu is at his side, - then his friend dies and he goes to the guardians of the underworld to beg for himself and his friend. But he too must die - to be reborn as the sun is reborn..”
“ this mortal must put on immortality” murmured Pellew, then
“Does that not seem strange - the notion that we should put on immortality? when as Christians we believe in one who shed his immortality for us ? That he might be as we are. Sometimes that frightens me John, what that demands of us.”
“ Sir, you will know already that I - do not in whole -part share your faith , much though I honour the man it has formed you. To be ...but there is much is true in what you say,. There is something profound there “ many waters cannot quench love “ - such truth in that - but for me it is also not quite right, for I have seen too much to make me not doubt.”
Pellew nodded ,though he was really caught up in his own thought too much to respond
“But ‘to be as we are’- yet he was so much than we are. I hear that like an accusation some times - you know, on deck after an action, and I am looking - lookingfor the faces that are gone or the bodies lying in those lakes of blood and, God help me, there are always some that one is praying hardest to see that they live .More than for the others. Even there in all that awful carnage when it should not beso, still our humanity - our care, our love falls short.”
Bracey thought of the careful penning of letters to widows and wives;the concern for their well-being; of the patient sitting beside deathbeds helping men make their last testament , accepting responsibility for their few treasure to get them home- He thought of the spending of prize money on a fitting funeral for an enemy captain, of trying to get his property sent home in the midst of a revolutionary war..and said to himself that there were ways and ways of falling short and his captain’s were judged by a standard few would pass - least of all his own self of course.
“But, sir, it would be true of us all - those two,Horatio and Archie, for instance, we all know - there is that about them - perhaps because they so self evidently would walk through hell itself could they but do it hand in hand - if we lost them...the entire ship more or less would be as you describe . for Kennedy’s courage in that damned gaol and his willingness to go back there because Horatio had promised, or of Horatio jumping aboard that blazing ship ...
There are some lives whose loss diminishes many because their presence enriches so many. And we are human - is it not obvious that you would look for Pownall’s face or Fleetwood’s - or Horatio’s ? It is only natural that we are affected so.”
“You are no doubt right and yet still it makes me anxious.
And when peace comes - what would you do? “ Asked Pellew.
“O I am too old for Oxford now but I could teach others to help them get there or in a coastal school both sailing skills and academic- maybe my nephew could do what was denied his uncle
“PleaseGod that I don’t have to go back to farming - no education you see , John, so it was all I knew - except I knew nothing at all, And damned wheat and barley - you go out one morning and you go the next and even the next and there is no change and nothing not a damned thing you can do to make it grow faster !
He was parodying himself and delighted that Bracegirdle saw it too -“ I see it sir , one can’t stand on quarter r deck and command them “ Grow”....surely you will always be needed- at least for a while There must always be a future for someone with your skill and daring - in a relative peace, supposing one ever comes.”
Pellew lifted his shoulders to stretch them -“ as I hope there will -but we must get you your due dessert before then, John, its about time you were a commander. He held one hand out as if to check Bracey’s inevitable demurral - which the latter then forbore to make.
But rising he said :And now I must go , if I may be dismissed sir - and you should rest, sir. After all, I have one - er - scapegrace to get on deck in a form presentable and another to coax to sleep when he has a book of biblical love letters and a bottle of good burgundy from his overly indulgent captain to gloat over..Good nig- good morning sir!
“Good morning Mr Bracegirdle ..and thank you.”
On his return to the wardroom his footsteps , though careful, disturbed the sleepers, or rather one of them - Horatio first, blinking groggily up from the mass of tumbled curls , the luminous brown eyes hazy with sleep and turning, with recognition, instantly anxious.
“As you were Mr Hornblower -or rather not quite as you were - it its still an hour to your watch- I suggest a short rest in your own bunk and a wash might help - I’ll go and see if there is such a luxury to be scrounged as a bowl of warm water.” He saw Horatio’s eyes widen as he took in the empty table with no bottle and smiled.” By the way ,,Mr Kennedy’s wine is safe I thought it had better not be left around - heaven knows what temptation the captain’s best burgundy puts in the way of even such upright citizens as the first lieutenant !
Horatio was unable to suppress one last glance at the figure which had contrived to curl even in a wardroom chair- it was Archie’s prison instinct to make himself as small a possible that sometimes still told in sleep and Horatio found himself still wracked by that even though he was well-a ware that the same body could sleep in languorous sprawl after they made love and on other days also tucked against his shoulder , confiding and peaceful. Then he turned and obediently went off to his quarters.
Bracegirdle, returning with the water- (almost no -one ever refused Bracegirdle anything - not for authority alone, but because he was so polite in the asking and kind in the thanking-) found himself regarded by a rather tousled Archie, who was once again clutching his book to himself. “Was it you, sir who brought me the blanket - thank you very much, and thank you for marking my place”- it occurred to him to look at the folded sheet Bracey had used as the marker.
Bracey replied “It was in the back cover - i thought perhaps you had put it there - though its too fine paper for naval use I see that now.”
Archie was unfolding the paper as Bracey was speaking, rather delighted o find his lovely gift had extra mystery. “ There’s a poem - a transcription of Gaelic it says here.” Made at Barvas”
He trailed after Bracegirdle book in hand - looking in the front “ Hey this book belonged to a William Kenned y in Ross- shire no wonder Lady Pellew thought it would do “ But its not so very long ago - poor man - perhaps he had to sell or perhaps he died. Horatio had asked if the captain could help to get me a book and Lady Pellew found this in a book dealers in Plymouth - do you think he joined up? Its his writing in the transcription
The Song of the Wooden - its in praise of sailors sir- maybe Lady Pellew saw this too..”
“Horatio ! listen,” and he charged on into the cabin where Horatio was in the act of undressing . Bracey deposited the bowl and departed, saying over his shoulder as he left. “Mr Hornblower, on deck and immaculate as may be before the bell please” and Mr Kennedy “Yes sir ? officers need to take care to be fit for duty - I want you asleep by the watch bell and in ( he bit back saying “ your own bed” ) and added instead “ and not in a chair this time!” “ Aye sir “
Bracey could in fact hear just the murmur of voices as he laid himself down, feeli
ng surprisingly content m and knowing that the few hours sleep he might get now would not likely be subject to nightmares.
"Horatio listen!
My treasure among the men of the oar banks
When thou wouldst go to thy boat
That was work that well became thee
The lads would be at the oar bank
thyself would be at thy boat’s helm
A champion -like, valiant powerful man..
‘S na hada hia hi’s na hi ho hua.
Its written about you !
Horatio was struggling to cope , between blushes at the intensity of Archie newly- awake like this and trying to pull on a clean shirt while Archie had quite other designs on his chest and back . He managed to grab the poem from Archie’s hand during a well timed distraction kiss. Succeeded - temporarily -in getting into his new shirt and, catching the gaze of delighted battle in Archie’s glowing face, went on reading :
My treasure and my ransom and my dower is
Young John son of James of the great round eyes
Blue is thine eye and it is no mockery..
...and mine own good wish to thee for thy safe coming...
“That verse is you, Archie - Ar-chie !”- but his protest against having his lower half washed with assistance was very token...
So it was that , in the end, with barely some five minutes to spare Mr Hornblower was indeed on deck and observed by Mr Bowles the master and of course reported to the Lieutenant and Captain later, to be very tidy. All the way from his brushed hat and damp curls to the rather shabby but nonetheless polished shoes. And he was smiling even as he thought no one watched him.
And Mr Kennedy was at least in his bunk though he was not asleep but almost; one hand still clutching the book ad its extra contents whose last verse he was reciting even as he fell fast asleep again.
My treasure and my ransom and my hoard
Beauty of hair grew richly upon thee
hair in luxuriant precious locks...
were I a bard I would make an oar song
were I a carpenter I would make a boat
here beside thee must I ever remain...
Notes :
The song that Archie and Horatio read is part of The Rowing song of the Wooden Galley which was collected by Carmichael from the notebooks of Malcolm ( Angus) McPhail, free church minister at Kilmartin, Argyle in the 1890s but who was born at Barvas, on Lewis. It had been notated by him listening to an old man on Lewis singing it The hero is said to be Iain Og Mac Sheumais, son of James McDonald of Castle Camus, according to the notes made by Carmichael. I have omitted a few lines from the stanzas quoted and some stanzas altogether and changed one word only .See Carmina Gadelica,Floris Books edition, 1994 pages 448-10.
The religious position of Edward Pellew is reltively consistent with the belief of a committed evangelical Christian of the late 18th early 19th century and thus with what he was known to be.=, although his deeper religious experiences and confession were mainly in the second half of his life. Bracegirdle represents the form of agnostic enlightenment thinking not inconsistent with some of the teachers he may have had , who were influenced by these trends. The details about the letter forbidding them to cruise for prizes and yet Lord Bridport’s allowing of this to other captains and about Lord Spencer’s letter are historically accurate, and date from the year 1797.