The Ethical Lecher.
This is something I said I'd toss together. It's a bit rough, but I think it's a pretty good beginning. There has been a lot of recent discussion on some lists and other people's LJs about protecting your own boundaries. Someone asked "What if I'm the Creep?" This is my attempt to answer that question
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I see a lot more problems with male-on-female lechery than female-initiated lechery. Probably because of the rarity, thought, it's even harder to deal with.
Maybe some women who have been identified as creepy and amended their ways would step up with some advice for their icky sisters?
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I don't think I'd change anything in your list above to adjust for non-sexual issues or different genders. It's pretty global in scope.
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I usually avoid these types afterwards.
My point is the same the Zappa's: Girls can be assholes too.
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I like this boundary thread more than the one on chat, for some reason. I thought it was the lack of pepper spray, but we have that here too...
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Think. Ask permission to touch.
Really simple. It's basic respect.
When people are actually paying attention to others, I believe they can read "Yes" and "No" really well. When someone is caught up in their own little world, it is a lot more common to see boundary violations.
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"just because this is your time to cut loose and lose all your inhibitions doesn't mean everyone else wants to play," or
"People are here for a lot of different reasons. I know you're hot, but you aren't always going to be the answer to that question."
And if I was being snarky, I'd say, "Look around: lovely as they might be, your tits don't make you special."
Other than that, the same guidance applies.
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I don't know how to type the laugh I just did, but it was a fun one. Thanks!
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She loves sixty-nine, but doesn't cum late
She'd never call back the women she ate
That's why the lady is a creep
Doesn't like scat games, with barons and earls
Won't go to Harlem, with a necklace of pearls
Won't dish a shocker to the rest of those girls
That's why the lady is a creep
She loves the free, fresh wind in her cunt
Life with Allen Funt
She's broke, takes toke
She's a big fornicator, with anyone she'll sleep
That's why the lady is a creep
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It's okay if you don't want to. It won't hurt my feelings. You probably think you're better than me. You probably think it's gross. My parents were judgmental like that. They really made me feel ashamed of my sexuality. I really thought I'd found a different group of people in this Burner crowd. Seems like everyone is so accepting and free.
Why won't you touch my penis?
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Personally, I shouldn't have to explain why I don't want you to touch me. If I have to explain, that pretty much sets up this assumption that you deserve to touch me and I have wrongly rejected you.
Free self expression is great. Acceptance is great. However, acceptance works both ways. You've got to accept both rejection and approval equally to get any value out of it.
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Well said.
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