012 ► NOW WHERE'S YOUR PICKET FENCE, LOVE?
I hate it.
I hate that I can't do anything but just sit here and accept it. I hate that no matter how strong I try to be now I can't go back and fix anything. I hate that I constantly feel as if I did something wrong, as if there were something more that I could do.
I hate that I have, in some sick way, felt grateful. I hate that I can't tell my therapist any of what's been going on and I hate that I'm scared to go to the police and I hate that I need a therapist in the first place. It makes me feel like I'm crazy. It makes me feel like he made me crazy.
And, I hate that I'm posting all of this even though none of it makes sense and I don't know why.
I hate that I can't do anything but just sit here and accept it. I hate that no matter how strong I try to be now I can't go back and fix anything. I hate that I constantly feel as if I did something wrong, as if there were something more that I could do.
I hate that I have, in some sick way, felt grateful. I hate that I can't tell my therapist any of what's been going on and I hate that I'm scared to go to the police and I hate that I need a therapist in the first place. It makes me feel like I'm crazy. It makes me feel like he made me crazy.
And, I hate that I'm posting all of this even though none of it makes sense and I don't know why.