Title: My Wish For You
Pairing: Puck/Quinn
Rating: T
Spoilers: all aired eps
Summary: Puck has something to tell Quinn. This is what I fear we may get as far as canon goes, not what I actually want. Songfic, song used is My Wish, by Rascal Flatts.
Disclaimer: The characters of glee are not mine. This idea came to me when I got done with a oneshot for Finn/Quinn which was of course a breakup fic because I ship Finchel and Quick. This is a Quick oneshot, and it’s not a happy one. Puck is letting Quinn go. The song I Wish belongs to Rascal Flatts, their record label, and the songwriters Jeffrey Steele and Steve Robson. (I love Jeffrey Steele, wanted to mention him by name.) I hope you like this, I actually don’t want this to happen, but I could see this happening.
My Wish For You
By Julia
The door to her locker was open. Puck could not believe that she was already using a cane. She hadn’t really been able to dance during Nationals, but he gave Quinn credit, she had done a lot of hard work since she had promised that she would be out of her wheelchair. Puck had to admit, he never doubted that she could do it, Quinn Fabray was very driven and very strong. It didn’t surprise him that she was already using a cane. Puck watched her for a minute before he went to say hi to her. “Hey.” He said as he approached her.
Turning, she looked at him. She actually gave him a brief smile before she began taking more things out of her locker. Quinn didn’t look at him as she said it, but she said, “So, what’s up? Did you want something?”
That was not an easy question to answer. Puck shrugged. He didn’t know how to answer. He knew that she didn’t want to get back together, and he didn’t know that he should try. They were heading to different parts of the country. If Puck had any other talent he thought he could use besides pool cleaning he would suggest it to her. Puck was pretty sure pool cleaning was his best shot at making it. Even if the idea didn’t sound like the best idea to some people. “I just... I wanted to tell you how proud I am of you. You beat all the odds. And you know for a fact you’re getting out of here. Yale’s lucky to have you.”
I hope the days come easy,
the moments pass slow and
each road leads you to where you want to go
and if you’re forced with the choice
and you have to choose I hope you choose the one
that means the most to you
and if one door opens to another door closed
I hope you keep on walkin’ til you find the window
If it’s cold outside show the world the warmth of your smile
But more than anything, more than anything
Quinn closed her locker, and then turned to him. She seemed amused, which was surprising to him on many levels. She didn’t know what to say, it seemed like, too. Finally she said, “Really? You’re proud of me?”
Trying not to smile too slyly, he nodded. “Yeah. You did amazing, getting out of your wheelchair and whatnot. And you got into Yale. I am just really proud of you.”
She looked back at him. She seemed even more confused. “Well, thanks, I guess. What’s your real angle, Puckerman? You never do anything unless something is in it for you, so spill. What’s the deal?”
Puck looked at her. He stepped a little closer. “Quinn, I just, I know you worked hard. I know you were gonna get out of here. I’m really proud of you.” He knew it sounded funny. But he was. He loved her. All he wanted was the best for her. And she deserved it, too. “I’m glad you’re getting what you want.”
That elicited another smile. “Is that what this is about? You want to get back together?” Quinn asked, as she leaned against the lockers for support.
Freezing, Puck said, “No... I mean, no...” Stopping, and sighing, “Quinn, I will probably always love you. But no, I don’t want to hold you back from what you want.” Puck was sure if he got back with her, he would hold her back.
My wish for you
is that life becomes all that you want it to
your dreams stay big, your worries stay small,
you never need to carry more than you can hold,
and while you’re out there gettin’ to where
you’re gettin’ to I hope you know somebody loves you
and wants the same things too yeah,
this is my wish
Puck felt better as he said it, he needed to say it. She didn’t say anything at first, she just stood there. She didn’t seem like she had bad feelings about it. Puck added, “I just, I want you to have all the things you want. It.... it doesn’t sound badass or anything but I do. I want you to have it all.”
This made tears prick at her eyes. That surprised him. He waited for what she had to say. She was quiet for a minute, and then she touched his chest. “Puck.... that is really sweet. It really is. I shouldn’t say things like sleeping with you was stupid. You are not stupid. I... I think a part of me may have loved you. But you didn’t... you don’t deserve part of me. You are a great guy under all the bravado. One day, someone will be lucky to get you. I just...” She stopped.
Wiping a tear off her cheek with his thumb, Puck said, “I didn’t... need you to say all of that, but I am glad you did. I appreciate that you feel that way. I just, I don’t want you to be held back by me. We all know that I will hold you back.”
It was true but she said that he wouldn’t. “You wouldn’t.” Puck was glad that she had said it though. It made him feel better.
I hope you never look back but you never forget
All the ones who love you and the place you left
I hope you always forgive and you never forget
and you help somebody every chance you get
Oh, you had God’s grace in every mistake
and always give more than you take but more than anything
yeah, more than anything
They stood there for a minute, and then Quinn said, “Well, I’ve got to class, and so do you.” This last bit she said pointedly, to stress her point to Puck.
Nodding, he made no move to go, just watched her go. Puck didn’t know how, but he was going to have to somehow make it through his life without that girl on his arm, because he was not going to bring her down. Or get in her way.
A few weeks later, it was time for Puck to leave for California. Quinn was still getting things together for Yale, even though it was awhile before she’d really have to be ready. Puck had asked if anyone wanted to come and see him off, and the whole glee club, Mr. Schue, and to his surprise, Coaches Beiste and Sylvester had shown up.
Saying goodbye was going to prove difficult. He had planned on a tiny party before he took off. He’d gotten a few pizzas, had some salads, chips, sodas. He had gotten plastic everything so he could just throw it all away before he took off. Puck didn’t know how he was going to do it, despite his best efforts, these people had become his friends.
His ma and Sarah were also there, and his ma was trying not to chew him out in front of all of the people in the backyard. It was basically his graduation party, minus extended family, because they’d had one with his extended family. His sister was busy making sure everyone had gotten something to eat. “Noah, you better make sure you have enough cash for gas.” Ruth Puckerman was saying, as she was heading to talk to Coach Beiste.
Puck was eating pizza and standing with Sam Evans and Mike Chang. “Yeah, Ma.” Puck said, he was driving to California in his truck, and he’d hired movers to drive a U-Haul with the stuff that didn’t fit in his truck. The talk he was having with Mike and Sam mostly consisted of what music he was going to listen to on the way. He wasn’t paying much attention. His eye was on Quinn, who was talking to Finn and Rachel. Finn’s mom and Kurt’s dad weren’t able to come, but they’d sent the boys with money for Puck, which he thought was nice.
My wish for you
is that life becomes all that you want it to
your dreams stay big, your worries
stay small, you never need to carry
more than you can hold and while
you’re out there gettin’ where you’re
gettin’ to I hope you know somebody loves you,
and wants the same things too yeah,
this is my wish
The impromptu party went on for a couple of hours, and then it was time for goodbyes. Puck told Kurt, Blaine, Mike, Sam, Tina, Mercedes, Sugar, Rory, Joe, (aka Teen Jesus) and the coaches that he loved them and he’d miss them all at once. Then it was time for the more personal ones. He started with Mr. Schue. “Mr. Schue, nobody ever... thought I had potential. No one ever thought I would make it out of Lima. Not even Ma. Though, she’d never admit it.” Puck stopped, forcing himself not to cry. “You did. You always tried to make me believe I was more than a Lima loser. That I could do anything I wanted. I appreciate it.”
By this point, Will was crying, and that made Puck cry. After a long hug, Will told him good luck, if he needed anything, just speak up, and then Puck moved on to Santana. He and the girl had gone through a lot together, not that they had actually talked about most of it. Puck looked at her for a minute before he wrapped his arms around her tightly. He held her close for awhile before he let her go. “San, I know we don’t do mushy stuff. But I want you to know that you can lean on me for anything you want, and a part of me is going to love you for a very long time. Take care of yourself. And Brittany.” He knew that was a no brainer, Santana loved Brittany.
Wiping her eyes, Santana leveled him with a gaze. “You just make sure you don’t get in trouble with the cops, you don’t know anyone in California to break you out of jail.” They both laughed, and then it was on to Brittany.
They stared at each other for 5 minutes, then Brittany proclaimed to love him, gave him a hug, and then bounced off to Santana. Puck just scratched his head and went to talk to Finn and Rachel. He had such a history with both of them, and he didn’t know how he was going to say what he wanted to both of them. Puck sat in front of both of them for a moment, gathering strength about what he wanted to say.
Finally, he said, “Finn, you’re my best friend. I’ve done some shitty stuff to you, and I am glad that we came out of it still friends. I don’t deserve it, and I am glad you saw fit to forgive me.” Then he looked to Rachel. “I don’t know how, but you became like a little sister to me. I don’t know what I would have done without you. Ma wanted me to marry you, I’m glad you’re happy with Finn.”
Rachel’s eyes filled with tears. She didn’t know what to say. She touched Puck’s arm. “No one has ever said that to me before, Noah. I am really glad you took the time to tell me that.” Rachel then looked at him. Quinn was the last one that he had to talk to. “Are you sure that you are ready to talk to Quinn?” Rachel asked, as she looked back Puck. Puck didn’t know if he was or not, but he knew it had to happen.
“No, I don’t know if I am or not, but it’s gotta happen. I don’t want to leave for California without saying what I want her to know.” Puck replied, and then got up to go to her.
Quinn had known this was coming. She was not sure she was ready to talk about whatever it was Puck wanted to talk about. She knew it was going to be hard, whatever it was. When he walked up to her, she wasn’t sure what to say. “Hey.” She said, a bit lamely.
Puck ran his hand along his left arm. He didn’t know how to start with what he wanted to say. “Hey. I... need to say some things to you. I don’t know if you want to hear it, but I can’t go to California without telling you.” He was nervous. “We... we went through a lot this year. And the past couple of years. I am sorry for all that I put you through. I was a grade a ass to you. I can’t believe that I ever treated you that way. I don’t deserve a girl like you.” Puck didn’t know how he could ever have treated her the way he had. “I also want you to know that I hope that everything goes the way you want it to at Yale. I want to be with you, but I refuse to hold you back. I just want you to know that you will have me, out there rooting for you to be all you can be.”
My wish for you
Is that this life becomes all that you want it to
Your dreams stay big, your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold
and while you’re out there gettin’ where you’re
gettin’ to I hope you know somebody loves you
And wants the same things too yeah
this is my wish
This made Quinn’s eyes fill with tears. She didn’t know what to say. First of all, about Puck’s insistence that he would hold her back, and his belief that he would. Quinn wasn’t so sure that he would. Puck had grown up a lot since he had knocked her up. Tucking a piece of her blonde hair behind her ear, she looked at him. Finally, she said, “If you had shown this part of yourself when we were dating to me I think things might have ended up differently.” She hoped that didn’t hurt his feelings.
“Puck, I will probably always care about you in some way, you are the father of my child, even if I didn’t get to raise her. I also think that you have grown up a lot in the past couple of years, just the fact that you are willing to let me go instead of fighting for me proves that. You are sweet to think that. I don’t think you’d hold me back, but I just.... I don’t feel the same way about you. I wish I did, it might make things easier. But I don’t. I’m sorry, Puck.” She really was, too, Puck had turned out to be an amazing guy.
His face was almost unreadable, but he nodded, leaned forward, and pressed a light kiss to her cheek.
After that, everyone took off. Puck then said goodbye to his ma and Sarah, and then took off for California. He was going to miss his friends, and his ma and his sister. And his nana. But not Lima. On to greener pastures.
This is my wish
I hope you know somebody loves you
May all your dreams stay big
Author’s note: I hope you liked. As a fervent Puck/Quinn shipper, I of course don’t want it to end this way. But it’s what I fear we may get. Alright, review if you like!