been so long
i NEVER update.. this is for me more than anything although i know quite a few of you like to come on here and post crap in your journals so that others will read it and either.. feel sorry for you, agree with you, get pissed or whatever it is you people are after.. i used to do that too, its cool, you might grow out of it eventually. this is for me to have this shit down while its still in my head so i can look back in a couple of months and read about all the crazy shit i almost forgot happened. it might contain some content that isnt suitable for the closed minded so if you fall into this category, you might as well let the little fingers fall on the mouse and click the back button or rotate that scroll wheel down a tad.
went to vegas for 2 weekends in a row and partied with my best friend.. first one was off the hook but this one was by far the craziest, loudest, most intense outta control weekend/birthday party of my life
who all went... my boss joe, his brother in law cliff, bruce, brooks, robbie, bot tang, steve, 2 of their homies, lester, hoang, ernie t, me and big D
kick this shit off
Friday: supposed to get to joes in rancho santa margarita at 1:00... im a half hour late. take off by 1:40 in his sequoia on 20's with 3 tvs... not bad for a thirty something married white male haha. pop a couple cold ones while we're rolling.. cliff was driving so me and joe could start the weekend. couple cold ones merge into a few vodka/monsters. hit traffic like a bitch as we barely get into ontario.. like.. horrible, crawling and shit. 2mph. by this time i got a lot of liquid in me and i gotta piss like a lame russian race horse stabled next to a glue factory. the next exit isnt for a mile and ive been holding it for like 45 mins already.. i cant wait, i open up a 44oz cup that joe had brought along, and unleash.. fill that bitch to the top right in the back of the sequoia. poured it out the window and we were good to go. hit the next exit anyway to see if we can bypass the traffic.. turns out theres a wildfire up by glen helen parkway and the only detour is to take some god aweful route that'll take about 45 mins.. fuck it, we take the detour.. theyre doing construction on the road so it ends up taking an hour and a half... we hit the 15 again after a couple more V/M's and some flirtation with a milf in a suburban.. by this time me and joe are feeling great. as soon as we get back on the 15 we notice we're right next to the same big rig we were next to before our detour.. what a waste. finally hit stateline by 8:00. by the time we get there im tossed, joes glassy eyed and for some reason the whole bottle of vodka is empty... we got plenty of monsters still though :) first thing we did was check in and then hit up the casino. i call derrick and tell him to meet us at the excaliber. he rolls up and we start things off. played a little blackjack i think and some other crap, slots, roulette, whatever struck my fancy.. go down about 80 bucks. not bad for 4 hours of fun by this time its midnight and we're already into saturday
Saturday: sat down at one of the video poker bars and cliff and derrick were both gettin hot at the bartender.. the dude was a real prick. i dunno where i went but i took off for a little run, and when i came back i get told that i just missed cliff hookin up with some hot blonde named casey.. NICE! brooks and bruce call to meet up at the hardrock, and we're off in the cab. cabbie was cool, some dude from new york and whatnot.. cant stand vegas he said. i love it. hit up the hardrock and pretty much just chill for a good hour. derrick rolls home without sayin shit. i start up on the roulette table. doubled my money a few times lost it all back, no biggie im in vegas you dont go there expecting to win. by this time i feel like utter shit. only thing ive had to eat the whole day/night is a slim jim and some doritos. feel like ima puke so we go get something to eat. cliff tries hooking me up with some broads, all i get is hugs. its cool i wouldnt wanna puke on em anyway. i get my food, that shit doesnt help. i actually feel worse. hoang, lester and ernie show up, and they eat. i finish my shit early and start walking it off. i decide im done drinking for the night. i walk to a roulette table and toss away 20 bones on black.. fuckin red.. i see the hottest chick ive ever seen in my life.. cross between jennifer love hewitt and lacey chabert but she acts like a stuck up stone cold cunt. i just eye her from a distance. i watch hoang play some single deck blackjack and stare at the blonde with the huge knockers. joe and cliff take off to get some shut eye, bruce, brooks and robbie go to spearmint rhino but bruce doesnt end up getting in cuz they have a "no jersey" policy. i chill with hoang and lester and ernie cuz im not down to hit the sack yet. we hit the MGM where theyre staying and hoang ends up winning about 3 bills on a slot machine. every dollar he put in any machine would just multipy itself by 3 somehow in there. he was on a roll. we finally go up to the room as the old me are going to their golf game at around 8 am. i cant sleep cuz lesters drunk and snoring.. i hop in the walk in closet, throw down some cushions and i got my own little room excellent. fuckin maid knocks like 4 times in the middle of my sleep and wakes my bitch ass up. we hang the do not disturb you dumb bitch sign out front. we wake up at 3pm. i go back to the excaliber, shower, shit shave, and its off to cesars palace to eat with lester and a few others. lester almost handles a 35 oz burrito, ernie takes it like a champ.. i cant finish my fish tacos and joe gets hurricaned. we see howie mandel.. that fools not funny when hes eatting. we hit the shops up in cesars... they have a store called pink where they sell pimped out ties. i like. hoang gets me a 20 dollar cigar for my bday. we depart to the imperial palace, and derrick calls up to meet after he gets off work. on the way to the imperial we're discussing the events for the upcoming night. joe wants to see titties and nobody goes against it. i find a flyer for hookers... or strippers whatever on the ground, i give it to cliff and he makes the call. we set it up for 2 chicks at the MGM suite at 10pm. we hit imperial. me and hoang hit up pai gow. we do pretty good the cocktail waitress had my back with the screwdrivers. joe and lester do jaeger bombs and lester outs his 35oz burrito all over the floor in the bathroom.. nice. im feelin good by this time and me and hoang decide to move on from pai gow. we hit up blackjack with joe where hes throwin his money away like its cool. i do the same but on a smaller scale, as does hoang and derrick. joe dropped like 6 bills in 20 mins.. needless to say his peeved. we go back to the excaliber and meet up with bot, steve and their 2 cambodian homies. bot introduces me to the beer bong betty and we get to business. bot demonstrates, steve cant hang and im next. i took 2. i wanted 3 but no one had faith. bot downed a 4 jugger and i was impressed. while i was holding the funnel i spilled a shit load all over hoang, he was mad but we all laughed. brooks his friend louis had met some chicks at the pool by the trop, they show up. we think they'll be beat, theyre hotter than satan's testicles. the blonde with the juggs goes to sdsu so she can handle a bong rip as well, she does, i gawk at the fabulas titties and thats that. everyone changes without me knowing and im left there in my shorts, i go back to our room, and change. derrick shows back up because he was out gettin his sweater or something like that. we take off to go to his pad so he can change into proper club attire. he does, and i do his hair ha ha. he thinks its gay he looks like a rockstar he takes it out, he looks normal. we go to the MGM. theres only 2 fools there. hoangs gambling, brooks and bruce are at the rum jungle with the hoes they met and joe and cliff are on their way. by this time its like 10 and theres no hookers yet. cliff changed it to 11 and thats all good in my book cuz im not even faded yet. i shotgun 2 bud lights and get beer all over my freshly pressed shirt and diesel jeans. i re-iron my shit and lester pulls out the gray goose, he runs down and gets redbulls and its on like donkey kong. we're chillin drinkin and we run outta booze. bottle from full to empty in like 2 minutes. me, derrick and steve run down to grab another bottle. the hookers called and raised the price double. joes still down for titties and im not buying so im all good. we get absolute mandarin which goes excellent with the redbull. bot shows up and i test out his banana republic white blazer. i look smashing and he says i can borrow i for the night so i can front that im rich. im down. bitches finally show up and im gettin faded. i light up a cigar in a no smoking room. who knew. the hoes are haggling over price with fools that are tighter than a bulls ass at fly time, so they get no where quick. hoang sweet talks em in the bathroom and the first titties are out. im havin a good time with 2 bitches while everyones watching. i spread the love and we're all having fun. cliff hits the head for head with the asian one.. hes in there like 20 mins so the rest of us are all over the white broad. hoang grabs a handful of cooch lips and i give him props. she pulls a dollar off my face with her g-string and i take a big whiff. too drunk to smell.. im feeling excellent by now and i start hitting the bottle straight. me and derrick are all over the white girl and that fool and everyone else keeps giving me props for my birthday. i feel liek a king. pretty soon we look aroudn and hoangs gone.. that fools gettin head too. after theyre done the girls are gettin ready to take off so me and derrick hit up the blonde for some casco... she's too expensive but derricks down to pay 3/4ths i got no fundage on me and besides shes married and i'd feel bad. i watch as they leave, they say they had fun, and im happy. fuck the neighbors who were pounding on the walls. by this time its gotta be around 1 but with that much bare ass in the room who looks at a watch.. i'll call it sunday by this time
Sunday:we take off and this is where it all gets fuzzy. i hear we walked but i dont remember. derrick came up on 2 chicks on the strip and we met some random lonely fool named tom. we let him chill with us and we walk to the luxor. we hit club RA and i dont know how we got in, cuz i didnt pay and derrick had no cash.. musta been the blazer.. ahh fuck bot took it back in the room.. whatever.. boyish good looks i guess. we get inside and im fuckin trashed im feelin the beats but not the bitches. no hot chicks. i bust a scott vogel at the club 2 stepping and staying ultra "posi" throughout the whole night. no fights, givin fools props but occasionally a rearward elbow just for show. i c-walk when 50 comes on.. love it or leave it. we see lester and steve. luna's doing a rooster dance and that fools got game. lesters scared ima get in a fight but all those homies were feelin me. derrick buys me an adios and i spit it all over the bar. i couldnt handle any more alcohol. i tell this chick to dance with me and give her the "bring it" motion and she doesnt do it.. prolly scared. derrick is handling 2 black chicks on the floor at one time. i try to join in and kill his game. they werent down with my 2 step. i sit down at some little louge area and knock out for prolly 20 mins. next thing i know i elbow the wall and try to punch through the glass. then for some reason we're not in the club anymore, but we're walking again. i try to pay for a cab with a visa card and that fool says cash only. i say fuck you then and kick the cab, he speeds off. we end up trying to stagger our way back to the MGM but get lost in the mandalay bay somehow. we're in there a good 2 hours just trying to figure out how to get out. some lezbo security bitch is talkin shit cuz im carrying my shoes. theyre made for looks and snazzyness i tell the bitch and she waddles off. we finally get to the MGM and we see joe. i forcefully meet some blonde girl coming out of the bathroom and she becomes my girlfriend. she wants to leave but that bitch doesnt know what shes doing. shes hammered as fuck too and dropping shit. somehow she gets away. shoulda just taken her back up to the room. joe calls me a stalker.. you cant stalk a girlfriend though. we try to go the room but derrick takes the wrong elevator. he says lets take the stairs and i say nahh. the other elevator is guarded and we cant get up. we go to the front desk and tell em something but i cant understand what hes saying. i try calling ernie and my phone cuts out. i throw it against the elevator wall and the flip screen breaks off. i do it up right and rip the rest of it apart and stomp on the remains. i lay down in the lobby and take a little nap. me and derrick look for the truck. we cant find it, my feet still hurt and im gettin pissed. we stop to chill, i slap derrick and he hits me hard as fuck with a shoe. we find the truck try to knock out but decide to take off instead. derricks still fucked up and i dunno how hes driving. we get to his pad and he drops trough in front of me. weenie all out in the open. im scared so i shut my eyes and wake up to daylight, swamp ass and a bad fuckin headache. im shittin bricks cuz its 11am and joes supposed to leave at 10am. my phone is fucked so i cant even get any calls. i call him from derricks phone which is no easy task to try and find it and he still there. i take 2 watery shits and try to get derrick up. i have a ton of water put on my clothes and take off. i have a blister on my forearm, a lump on my head and my ankles killing me from the c-walking. my fist is swollen and my elbow's bruised. derrick thinks he broke his thumb. we get back to excaliber and i gather my shit, exchange foggy memories of the past 8 hours with bruce and brooks and im off to the sequoia on 20's again
went to vegas for 2 weekends in a row and partied with my best friend.. first one was off the hook but this one was by far the craziest, loudest, most intense outta control weekend/birthday party of my life
who all went... my boss joe, his brother in law cliff, bruce, brooks, robbie, bot tang, steve, 2 of their homies, lester, hoang, ernie t, me and big D
kick this shit off
Friday: supposed to get to joes in rancho santa margarita at 1:00... im a half hour late. take off by 1:40 in his sequoia on 20's with 3 tvs... not bad for a thirty something married white male haha. pop a couple cold ones while we're rolling.. cliff was driving so me and joe could start the weekend. couple cold ones merge into a few vodka/monsters. hit traffic like a bitch as we barely get into ontario.. like.. horrible, crawling and shit. 2mph. by this time i got a lot of liquid in me and i gotta piss like a lame russian race horse stabled next to a glue factory. the next exit isnt for a mile and ive been holding it for like 45 mins already.. i cant wait, i open up a 44oz cup that joe had brought along, and unleash.. fill that bitch to the top right in the back of the sequoia. poured it out the window and we were good to go. hit the next exit anyway to see if we can bypass the traffic.. turns out theres a wildfire up by glen helen parkway and the only detour is to take some god aweful route that'll take about 45 mins.. fuck it, we take the detour.. theyre doing construction on the road so it ends up taking an hour and a half... we hit the 15 again after a couple more V/M's and some flirtation with a milf in a suburban.. by this time me and joe are feeling great. as soon as we get back on the 15 we notice we're right next to the same big rig we were next to before our detour.. what a waste. finally hit stateline by 8:00. by the time we get there im tossed, joes glassy eyed and for some reason the whole bottle of vodka is empty... we got plenty of monsters still though :) first thing we did was check in and then hit up the casino. i call derrick and tell him to meet us at the excaliber. he rolls up and we start things off. played a little blackjack i think and some other crap, slots, roulette, whatever struck my fancy.. go down about 80 bucks. not bad for 4 hours of fun by this time its midnight and we're already into saturday
Saturday: sat down at one of the video poker bars and cliff and derrick were both gettin hot at the bartender.. the dude was a real prick. i dunno where i went but i took off for a little run, and when i came back i get told that i just missed cliff hookin up with some hot blonde named casey.. NICE! brooks and bruce call to meet up at the hardrock, and we're off in the cab. cabbie was cool, some dude from new york and whatnot.. cant stand vegas he said. i love it. hit up the hardrock and pretty much just chill for a good hour. derrick rolls home without sayin shit. i start up on the roulette table. doubled my money a few times lost it all back, no biggie im in vegas you dont go there expecting to win. by this time i feel like utter shit. only thing ive had to eat the whole day/night is a slim jim and some doritos. feel like ima puke so we go get something to eat. cliff tries hooking me up with some broads, all i get is hugs. its cool i wouldnt wanna puke on em anyway. i get my food, that shit doesnt help. i actually feel worse. hoang, lester and ernie show up, and they eat. i finish my shit early and start walking it off. i decide im done drinking for the night. i walk to a roulette table and toss away 20 bones on black.. fuckin red.. i see the hottest chick ive ever seen in my life.. cross between jennifer love hewitt and lacey chabert but she acts like a stuck up stone cold cunt. i just eye her from a distance. i watch hoang play some single deck blackjack and stare at the blonde with the huge knockers. joe and cliff take off to get some shut eye, bruce, brooks and robbie go to spearmint rhino but bruce doesnt end up getting in cuz they have a "no jersey" policy. i chill with hoang and lester and ernie cuz im not down to hit the sack yet. we hit the MGM where theyre staying and hoang ends up winning about 3 bills on a slot machine. every dollar he put in any machine would just multipy itself by 3 somehow in there. he was on a roll. we finally go up to the room as the old me are going to their golf game at around 8 am. i cant sleep cuz lesters drunk and snoring.. i hop in the walk in closet, throw down some cushions and i got my own little room excellent. fuckin maid knocks like 4 times in the middle of my sleep and wakes my bitch ass up. we hang the do not disturb you dumb bitch sign out front. we wake up at 3pm. i go back to the excaliber, shower, shit shave, and its off to cesars palace to eat with lester and a few others. lester almost handles a 35 oz burrito, ernie takes it like a champ.. i cant finish my fish tacos and joe gets hurricaned. we see howie mandel.. that fools not funny when hes eatting. we hit the shops up in cesars... they have a store called pink where they sell pimped out ties. i like. hoang gets me a 20 dollar cigar for my bday. we depart to the imperial palace, and derrick calls up to meet after he gets off work. on the way to the imperial we're discussing the events for the upcoming night. joe wants to see titties and nobody goes against it. i find a flyer for hookers... or strippers whatever on the ground, i give it to cliff and he makes the call. we set it up for 2 chicks at the MGM suite at 10pm. we hit imperial. me and hoang hit up pai gow. we do pretty good the cocktail waitress had my back with the screwdrivers. joe and lester do jaeger bombs and lester outs his 35oz burrito all over the floor in the bathroom.. nice. im feelin good by this time and me and hoang decide to move on from pai gow. we hit up blackjack with joe where hes throwin his money away like its cool. i do the same but on a smaller scale, as does hoang and derrick. joe dropped like 6 bills in 20 mins.. needless to say his peeved. we go back to the excaliber and meet up with bot, steve and their 2 cambodian homies. bot introduces me to the beer bong betty and we get to business. bot demonstrates, steve cant hang and im next. i took 2. i wanted 3 but no one had faith. bot downed a 4 jugger and i was impressed. while i was holding the funnel i spilled a shit load all over hoang, he was mad but we all laughed. brooks his friend louis had met some chicks at the pool by the trop, they show up. we think they'll be beat, theyre hotter than satan's testicles. the blonde with the juggs goes to sdsu so she can handle a bong rip as well, she does, i gawk at the fabulas titties and thats that. everyone changes without me knowing and im left there in my shorts, i go back to our room, and change. derrick shows back up because he was out gettin his sweater or something like that. we take off to go to his pad so he can change into proper club attire. he does, and i do his hair ha ha. he thinks its gay he looks like a rockstar he takes it out, he looks normal. we go to the MGM. theres only 2 fools there. hoangs gambling, brooks and bruce are at the rum jungle with the hoes they met and joe and cliff are on their way. by this time its like 10 and theres no hookers yet. cliff changed it to 11 and thats all good in my book cuz im not even faded yet. i shotgun 2 bud lights and get beer all over my freshly pressed shirt and diesel jeans. i re-iron my shit and lester pulls out the gray goose, he runs down and gets redbulls and its on like donkey kong. we're chillin drinkin and we run outta booze. bottle from full to empty in like 2 minutes. me, derrick and steve run down to grab another bottle. the hookers called and raised the price double. joes still down for titties and im not buying so im all good. we get absolute mandarin which goes excellent with the redbull. bot shows up and i test out his banana republic white blazer. i look smashing and he says i can borrow i for the night so i can front that im rich. im down. bitches finally show up and im gettin faded. i light up a cigar in a no smoking room. who knew. the hoes are haggling over price with fools that are tighter than a bulls ass at fly time, so they get no where quick. hoang sweet talks em in the bathroom and the first titties are out. im havin a good time with 2 bitches while everyones watching. i spread the love and we're all having fun. cliff hits the head for head with the asian one.. hes in there like 20 mins so the rest of us are all over the white broad. hoang grabs a handful of cooch lips and i give him props. she pulls a dollar off my face with her g-string and i take a big whiff. too drunk to smell.. im feeling excellent by now and i start hitting the bottle straight. me and derrick are all over the white girl and that fool and everyone else keeps giving me props for my birthday. i feel liek a king. pretty soon we look aroudn and hoangs gone.. that fools gettin head too. after theyre done the girls are gettin ready to take off so me and derrick hit up the blonde for some casco... she's too expensive but derricks down to pay 3/4ths i got no fundage on me and besides shes married and i'd feel bad. i watch as they leave, they say they had fun, and im happy. fuck the neighbors who were pounding on the walls. by this time its gotta be around 1 but with that much bare ass in the room who looks at a watch.. i'll call it sunday by this time
Sunday:we take off and this is where it all gets fuzzy. i hear we walked but i dont remember. derrick came up on 2 chicks on the strip and we met some random lonely fool named tom. we let him chill with us and we walk to the luxor. we hit club RA and i dont know how we got in, cuz i didnt pay and derrick had no cash.. musta been the blazer.. ahh fuck bot took it back in the room.. whatever.. boyish good looks i guess. we get inside and im fuckin trashed im feelin the beats but not the bitches. no hot chicks. i bust a scott vogel at the club 2 stepping and staying ultra "posi" throughout the whole night. no fights, givin fools props but occasionally a rearward elbow just for show. i c-walk when 50 comes on.. love it or leave it. we see lester and steve. luna's doing a rooster dance and that fools got game. lesters scared ima get in a fight but all those homies were feelin me. derrick buys me an adios and i spit it all over the bar. i couldnt handle any more alcohol. i tell this chick to dance with me and give her the "bring it" motion and she doesnt do it.. prolly scared. derrick is handling 2 black chicks on the floor at one time. i try to join in and kill his game. they werent down with my 2 step. i sit down at some little louge area and knock out for prolly 20 mins. next thing i know i elbow the wall and try to punch through the glass. then for some reason we're not in the club anymore, but we're walking again. i try to pay for a cab with a visa card and that fool says cash only. i say fuck you then and kick the cab, he speeds off. we end up trying to stagger our way back to the MGM but get lost in the mandalay bay somehow. we're in there a good 2 hours just trying to figure out how to get out. some lezbo security bitch is talkin shit cuz im carrying my shoes. theyre made for looks and snazzyness i tell the bitch and she waddles off. we finally get to the MGM and we see joe. i forcefully meet some blonde girl coming out of the bathroom and she becomes my girlfriend. she wants to leave but that bitch doesnt know what shes doing. shes hammered as fuck too and dropping shit. somehow she gets away. shoulda just taken her back up to the room. joe calls me a stalker.. you cant stalk a girlfriend though. we try to go the room but derrick takes the wrong elevator. he says lets take the stairs and i say nahh. the other elevator is guarded and we cant get up. we go to the front desk and tell em something but i cant understand what hes saying. i try calling ernie and my phone cuts out. i throw it against the elevator wall and the flip screen breaks off. i do it up right and rip the rest of it apart and stomp on the remains. i lay down in the lobby and take a little nap. me and derrick look for the truck. we cant find it, my feet still hurt and im gettin pissed. we stop to chill, i slap derrick and he hits me hard as fuck with a shoe. we find the truck try to knock out but decide to take off instead. derricks still fucked up and i dunno how hes driving. we get to his pad and he drops trough in front of me. weenie all out in the open. im scared so i shut my eyes and wake up to daylight, swamp ass and a bad fuckin headache. im shittin bricks cuz its 11am and joes supposed to leave at 10am. my phone is fucked so i cant even get any calls. i call him from derricks phone which is no easy task to try and find it and he still there. i take 2 watery shits and try to get derrick up. i have a ton of water put on my clothes and take off. i have a blister on my forearm, a lump on my head and my ankles killing me from the c-walking. my fist is swollen and my elbow's bruised. derrick thinks he broke his thumb. we get back to excaliber and i gather my shit, exchange foggy memories of the past 8 hours with bruce and brooks and im off to the sequoia on 20's again