Re: Kara's Dead Folks Issuesword_vomityJuly 16 2012, 20:26:08 UTC
And the miniseries reunion is kind of what sets it all off for pilots - once she's acknowledged, even in the smallest way, the fact that his death affects her, it's flat-out dangerous when he walks back into her life and is perfectly fine
And I think this is the crux of it, really. She possesses such a strong defensive mechanism that death is the only time that she can deal with her feelings and let them free. Because she so fears the repercussions of sincerity and openness. A lesson learned from both parents and from Zak. If you open yourself up, you will certainly get hurt.
Perhaps the only reason Lee and Sam do get to that place where she acknowledges her connection to them (even to herself) is because at different points, she assumed them both dead and let the true strength of her feelings manifest. Because she thought it was safe to finally do so.
Them coming back, though welcome, is disconcerting because 'now what?' pretty much. How do you un-recognize how important someone is to you? You can't. And so you can either push them away in fear; Lee. Or you can dive in headfirst; Sam.
Re: Kara's Dead Folks IssueswinegumsJuly 16 2012, 20:34:34 UTC
How do you un-recognize how important someone is to you? You can't.
Exactly. And Sam has many shades of Zak mk. II (easygoing dude who would do pretty much anything for her), it's impossible not to see the connection as stemming at least partly from what he symbolises - a fresh start, no baggage from her past - more than who he is.
Re: Kara's Dead Folks Issuesword_vomityJuly 16 2012, 20:43:23 UTC
Yup. Very true. I think it's well demonstrated that Kara is quite comfortable with a man who let's her decide how much she's willing to commit. It's one of the reasons her & Lee struggle, he wants it all, all the time. Sam & Zak are considerably less needy that way. Which is weird, because she was willing to marry both of them, which is supposedly the biggest commitment of all.
Re: Kara's Dead Folks IssueswinegumsJuly 16 2012, 20:50:48 UTC
I think it's the fact that with Sam and Zak (at least what we've extrapolated of Zak in canon), she is the one who calls the shots in those relationships, and they're ok with that.
With Lee, the combination of him not being willing to settle (he's pretty much the polar opposite of Sam and Zak, personality-wise, I'd guess he's certainly not Kara's usual type) plus her fear of her own feelings for him (too big, too scary, RUN!!!!) means that the power balance isn't quite so heavily weighted on her side there. And for someone who likes being spontaneous and unplanned, she's actually quite a fan of getting to dictate the terms on which her relationships are conducted.
And I think this is the crux of it, really. She possesses such a strong defensive mechanism that death is the only time that she can deal with her feelings and let them free. Because she so fears the repercussions of sincerity and openness. A lesson learned from both parents and from Zak. If you open yourself up, you will certainly get hurt.
Perhaps the only reason Lee and Sam do get to that place where she acknowledges her connection to them (even to herself) is because at different points, she assumed them both dead and let the true strength of her feelings manifest. Because she thought it was safe to finally do so.
Them coming back, though welcome, is disconcerting because 'now what?' pretty much. How do you un-recognize how important someone is to you? You can't. And so you can either push them away in fear; Lee. Or you can dive in headfirst; Sam.
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Exactly. And Sam has many shades of Zak mk. II (easygoing dude who would do pretty much anything for her), it's impossible not to see the connection as stemming at least partly from what he symbolises - a fresh start, no baggage from her past - more than who he is.
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With Lee, the combination of him not being willing to settle (he's pretty much the polar opposite of Sam and Zak, personality-wise, I'd guess he's certainly not Kara's usual type) plus her fear of her own feelings for him (too big, too scary, RUN!!!!) means that the power balance isn't quite so heavily weighted on her side there. And for someone who likes being spontaneous and unplanned, she's actually quite a fan of getting to dictate the terms on which her relationships are conducted.
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