(no subject)

[no_red_lights]

i have spent the last week in hell.
i found out i was the other girl.
my girlfriend already had one.
apparently it was an open relationship.. i feel like shit.
that was on saturday.

i spent last night in the hospital with my best friend because she was sick.. until four this morning, and again didnt go to school.
dani left at eleven thirty to go to mallory's.
after what happened between her and i yesterday, im kicking her out of my house.
i just dont feel safe anymore.
so i wrote song about it.

Well we've been down this road before

though its different this time I'm sure

no, im not okay

its not going to be alright this time

If you leave, I want you to stay

if you stay, I want you gone

when every lie is punctuated

by a promise that you never planned to keep

and watch my back

as I walk away

pierced by the damn knife you gave me

you're not worth my two cents

or the time I spent

on my back like the motherfucking meter was running

you don't reach my expectations

not like I set the bar that high

go fucking figure

it out yourself

If you leave, I want you to stay

if you stay, I want you gone

when every lie is punctuated

by a promise that you never planned to keep

and watch my back

as I walk away

pierced by the damn knife you gave me

you try too hard to impress

and all eyes are on you

but the one girl in the room that actually matters

could give a shit less about you

If you leave, I want you to stay

if you stay, I want you gone

when every lie is punctuated

by a promise that you never planned to keep

and watch my back

as I walk away

pierced by the damn knife you gave me

you know that all these words I sing

are purely out of jealousy

and all I want is for you to be able to be happy

with or without me.

im going to go see tegan and sara tonight with ro. nothing is going to ruin that.

i am SO much better than this.

so fuck you.