Puking and Crying
I don't like that I still have regular dreams of you. And I guess this will be another year without you. And that's okay. I'll go to work, I'll go on my travels, I'll hang out with my friends, you just won't be there. At one point you told me to take all of our hang outs and mutual friends, funny thing, I don't hang out at any of those places or with any of those friends anymore.
I never understood why I liked you so much in the past. I understand it even less why I still like you. And I hate this situation. I understand that you want to be non-monogamous, with you though, I don't think I could do that. What happens if I decide to move, do you come with? If I want to spend 3 months in Europe do you come with me to see the world? Or do you stay in Gainesville for another person? Because to me that seems like how we broke up last time.
And even more frustrating is the lack of interest I get from anyone else these days. Very true, only a handful of people have interested me in the last year and a half, but apparently it is never mutual. There was one really cute girl at a bar, but her friend got pissed off because nobody was hitting on her so she cockblocked me hard. And then there have been a couple of one night stands with mutual friends, but I wouldn't tell you about that. And I am actually interested in someone currently, but she is so involved with groups on campus we never get to hang out except once every 2 weeks.
You think at 26, about to turn 27, these things wouldn't bother me so much.
I never understood why I liked you so much in the past. I understand it even less why I still like you. And I hate this situation. I understand that you want to be non-monogamous, with you though, I don't think I could do that. What happens if I decide to move, do you come with? If I want to spend 3 months in Europe do you come with me to see the world? Or do you stay in Gainesville for another person? Because to me that seems like how we broke up last time.
And even more frustrating is the lack of interest I get from anyone else these days. Very true, only a handful of people have interested me in the last year and a half, but apparently it is never mutual. There was one really cute girl at a bar, but her friend got pissed off because nobody was hitting on her so she cockblocked me hard. And then there have been a couple of one night stands with mutual friends, but I wouldn't tell you about that. And I am actually interested in someone currently, but she is so involved with groups on campus we never get to hang out except once every 2 weeks.
You think at 26, about to turn 27, these things wouldn't bother me so much.