from the hands of christ to the heads of the daily mail / i'll see you all and i'll raise you
Well, fucking February (and not just for the sake of alliteration). It's been the longest shortest month - and I still have a congestion with a side of cough, plus a blooming mega!headache thanks to the latest pressure system currently slamming its front fender into my forehead - but I am NOT SICK ANYMORE. The viral, always-on-the-brink-of-fever painful pangs are gone, the fatigue is the normal "I barely slept... again" kind, and I don't sound like contagion on slow & cranky wheels! IT'S AMAZING. And I'd be celebrating right now with my first proper drink in over a month, except - headache. Fuck you, storm.
Look, I'm trying to reconcile with the weather. Behold my icon, the only pretty image of ice-related activity I'd ever liked enough to save! But it is tough. The below-freezing cold makes me miserable and eternally sick; the slush on the streets is disgusting; the fresh snow (which I like! and enjoy to frolic upon, if it's not windy!) turns into a dark, gross mess way too quickly as if I need a reminder that I live in a super dirty, polluted town; and even my strappy buckly boots don't bring me joy anymore. THIS WEATHER IS KILLING MY LOVE OF BADASS FOOTWEAR. Oh, the sadness.
SO. Coping techniques:
• listening to The Veils a lot
• drinking ALL the ginger lemon tea
• carrying a little plastic bag of zinc pills around in my purse (looks hella shady but I don't own small discreet pill boxes okay)
• wearing 2 (two!) scarves on my person whenever I step outside, the better to protect head+face from the elements
• wasting time on sites about comparing heights, money slang through history, tea as metaphor for understanding consent, and how/what to cook in a tiny joke kitchen (which I don't actually do, but it's still entertaining to read about)
• planning my next trip to Greece (in September!) - but not too much, because the images of sunny beaches actually depress me in the current reality
• instead of going out to the movies or the theatre or restaurants, staying at home and reading m/m romance novels
...okay, lately it's been reading a romance novel. Sort of on a loop. Which begins with "it's been a while, and I miss those guys, and what if I just read the beginning through the first blowjob?" but then I end up left with this residual emotional tension (because they're not exactly friends at that point in the story) so I have to read AT LEAST through the second BJ, except once that happens I remember I REALLY like the chapter with the collar stud, and after that the plot really picks up and gets action-y, and then there's A Super Hot Chapter, followed by Another Super Hot Chapter, and by then I just really need to read through the happy ending because it's so very satisfactory after their ~journey. ...And then a few days go by, and I think "aw, I kinda miss those guys" and so it starts AGAIN. #myThinkOfEnglandproblem
Wait, no, I'm gonna own this: it's been a while since I felt so into a text - movie, book, show - that I'd want to consume it repeatedly, the way I'd watched every new Buffy episode 3-5 times, or god, the number of times I'd seen Thor and then The Avengers AND SPEAKING OF, HAVE YOU SEEN THE FANTASTIC NEW TRAILER YET?!?!? - ahem. Anyway. Think of England is currently my happy place, with its mix of fanfic/romance tropes and their delightful subversions, its humor and drama and wonderfully written characters, its Edwardian pulp and its hot hot porn. I have yet to get tired of it, I could cry with frustration when I remember the next book in the series won't come out until summer of 2016, and if I need to wrap it around my brain in order to make it through this winter, by golly, it'll make a fanTAStic turban. So there.
• ...also, I've been doing some high quality AND quantity snuggling with the cat lately. She likes the cozy side of winter. I appreciate that.
Look, I'm trying to reconcile with the weather. Behold my icon, the only pretty image of ice-related activity I'd ever liked enough to save! But it is tough. The below-freezing cold makes me miserable and eternally sick; the slush on the streets is disgusting; the fresh snow (which I like! and enjoy to frolic upon, if it's not windy!) turns into a dark, gross mess way too quickly as if I need a reminder that I live in a super dirty, polluted town; and even my strappy buckly boots don't bring me joy anymore. THIS WEATHER IS KILLING MY LOVE OF BADASS FOOTWEAR. Oh, the sadness.
SO. Coping techniques:
• listening to The Veils a lot
• drinking ALL the ginger lemon tea
• carrying a little plastic bag of zinc pills around in my purse (looks hella shady but I don't own small discreet pill boxes okay)
• wearing 2 (two!) scarves on my person whenever I step outside, the better to protect head+face from the elements
• wasting time on sites about comparing heights, money slang through history, tea as metaphor for understanding consent, and how/what to cook in a tiny joke kitchen (which I don't actually do, but it's still entertaining to read about)
• planning my next trip to Greece (in September!) - but not too much, because the images of sunny beaches actually depress me in the current reality
• instead of going out to the movies or the theatre or restaurants, staying at home and reading m/m romance novels
...okay, lately it's been reading a romance novel. Sort of on a loop. Which begins with "it's been a while, and I miss those guys, and what if I just read the beginning through the first blowjob?" but then I end up left with this residual emotional tension (because they're not exactly friends at that point in the story) so I have to read AT LEAST through the second BJ, except once that happens I remember I REALLY like the chapter with the collar stud, and after that the plot really picks up and gets action-y, and then there's A Super Hot Chapter, followed by Another Super Hot Chapter, and by then I just really need to read through the happy ending because it's so very satisfactory after their ~journey. ...And then a few days go by, and I think "aw, I kinda miss those guys" and so it starts AGAIN. #myThinkOfEnglandproblem
Wait, no, I'm gonna own this: it's been a while since I felt so into a text - movie, book, show - that I'd want to consume it repeatedly, the way I'd watched every new Buffy episode 3-5 times, or god, the number of times I'd seen Thor and then The Avengers AND SPEAKING OF, HAVE YOU SEEN THE FANTASTIC NEW TRAILER YET?!?!? - ahem. Anyway. Think of England is currently my happy place, with its mix of fanfic/romance tropes and their delightful subversions, its humor and drama and wonderfully written characters, its Edwardian pulp and its hot hot porn. I have yet to get tired of it, I could cry with frustration when I remember the next book in the series won't come out until summer of 2016, and if I need to wrap it around my brain in order to make it through this winter, by golly, it'll make a fanTAStic turban. So there.
• ...also, I've been doing some high quality AND quantity snuggling with the cat lately. She likes the cozy side of winter. I appreciate that.