cold
i woke up from a dream-turn night mare.
it was so vivid. i dont remember the last time i woke up from a dream, or the last time i nightmared - or even the last time i truely remembered the dream.
everything was in color.
i was wearing a skirt i bought in israel.
i was w/ a woman - i dont know who. a mother like figure - but not my own.
i was in a director's office. im not sure whose.
i was trying to gain admittance into the program or school. it wasn't going well.
the director and his aid became verbally aggressive.
and then i made a comment to the aid. something to do w/ not being mean when wearing piyut (side burn things some orthodox jews have) (in retrospect the comment made no sense). he left to the bathroom (another part of the office) surpised that id made the comment and seemingly upset.
and then i was leaving. the person i was w/ got out before me, but the director stopped me before i got out the door.
it became abusive. i found myself on the floor and he was dragging me by my feet into the bathroom. there was a closet or something right next to the bathroom, i tried to hook my foot around it to stop the dragging. i was worried about exposing myself (that my skirt would hike up too high).
i woke up w/ a start at this point. tense.
i tried to fall back asleep but the longer i tried the more i woke up.
my mind is racing. no concrete thoughts, just a maze of speeding images running through my head.
the more i think about the dream the less i remember of it.
its almost 6:00 am. i guess ill study for a while. no ones online, i have no distractions. the streets are finally quiet.
but i wish i could go back to sleep.
it was so vivid. i dont remember the last time i woke up from a dream, or the last time i nightmared - or even the last time i truely remembered the dream.
everything was in color.
i was wearing a skirt i bought in israel.
i was w/ a woman - i dont know who. a mother like figure - but not my own.
i was in a director's office. im not sure whose.
i was trying to gain admittance into the program or school. it wasn't going well.
the director and his aid became verbally aggressive.
and then i made a comment to the aid. something to do w/ not being mean when wearing piyut (side burn things some orthodox jews have) (in retrospect the comment made no sense). he left to the bathroom (another part of the office) surpised that id made the comment and seemingly upset.
and then i was leaving. the person i was w/ got out before me, but the director stopped me before i got out the door.
it became abusive. i found myself on the floor and he was dragging me by my feet into the bathroom. there was a closet or something right next to the bathroom, i tried to hook my foot around it to stop the dragging. i was worried about exposing myself (that my skirt would hike up too high).
i woke up w/ a start at this point. tense.
i tried to fall back asleep but the longer i tried the more i woke up.
my mind is racing. no concrete thoughts, just a maze of speeding images running through my head.
the more i think about the dream the less i remember of it.
its almost 6:00 am. i guess ill study for a while. no ones online, i have no distractions. the streets are finally quiet.
but i wish i could go back to sleep.