A report on the sleep-training
So, we had a big debate about sleep-training, when I started it with Elizabeth a few months ago. We decided to sleep-train her because I found that I was spending the vast majority of the day putting her down for naps or bed, and then getting her up when she cried, letting her play a bit and trying again. Putting her down involved cuddling and rocking and singing until she was completely asleep. She wasn't getting enough sleep, and this ate up so much of my time that we weren't getting enough time to do much else.
I got a lot of support for the decision, and a lot of friendly, respectful debate about it. It's been five or six months now (I think), so I'm back to make my report.
Elizabeth goes straight to bed, three times a day, without complaint. She sleeps through the night, except for a brief wakefulness around 2 am, which she handles herself.
She does not appear to have any kind of attachment problems. She's incredibly loving and affectionate, calm and cheerful. She has had almost no separation anxiety. When she's hurt or scared during the day, she comes straight to me, as someone who she can count on to comfort her. She's rested, she's growing like a weed, she's developing at a ferocious pace and we have time to do other things during the day.
It was very hard. It's the worst feeling in the world, to sit outside your baby's room and listen to her scream like her heart is broken. There have been occasions when Jason has had to throw me out of the house, because I can't hack it. I would go for a walk, and, when I got back, she'd be asleep, and I'd be much calmer.
It's one of the best feelings in the world to have your baby contentedly go to sleep on her own. Which she now does, nineteen times out of twenty. There have been a couple of relapses. When we switched her from formula to water in her bottle, we had to go through the whole process again. But I learned that if I don't force to her lie down, but just put her in her crib, she would just play quietly by herself for half an hour or so, and then go to sleep, even if she wasn't interested in the bottle. Now she takes the bottle again.
I am SO glad we did this. It was very painful for everyone involved, but the pay-off is HUGE. I have a rested, happy, thriving baby, whose regular, reliable schedule keeps us all sane. No more guessing games about whether or not she's tired enough for her nap, yet. No worries about leaving her with our room mate after she's been put to bed, and I need to go pick up groceries. I know when she'll go to bed, and that she'll stay asleep. AND, this was established before the toddler power games.
Our lives are significantly and materially improved.
I got a lot of support for the decision, and a lot of friendly, respectful debate about it. It's been five or six months now (I think), so I'm back to make my report.
Elizabeth goes straight to bed, three times a day, without complaint. She sleeps through the night, except for a brief wakefulness around 2 am, which she handles herself.
She does not appear to have any kind of attachment problems. She's incredibly loving and affectionate, calm and cheerful. She has had almost no separation anxiety. When she's hurt or scared during the day, she comes straight to me, as someone who she can count on to comfort her. She's rested, she's growing like a weed, she's developing at a ferocious pace and we have time to do other things during the day.
It was very hard. It's the worst feeling in the world, to sit outside your baby's room and listen to her scream like her heart is broken. There have been occasions when Jason has had to throw me out of the house, because I can't hack it. I would go for a walk, and, when I got back, she'd be asleep, and I'd be much calmer.
It's one of the best feelings in the world to have your baby contentedly go to sleep on her own. Which she now does, nineteen times out of twenty. There have been a couple of relapses. When we switched her from formula to water in her bottle, we had to go through the whole process again. But I learned that if I don't force to her lie down, but just put her in her crib, she would just play quietly by herself for half an hour or so, and then go to sleep, even if she wasn't interested in the bottle. Now she takes the bottle again.
I am SO glad we did this. It was very painful for everyone involved, but the pay-off is HUGE. I have a rested, happy, thriving baby, whose regular, reliable schedule keeps us all sane. No more guessing games about whether or not she's tired enough for her nap, yet. No worries about leaving her with our room mate after she's been put to bed, and I need to go pick up groceries. I know when she'll go to bed, and that she'll stay asleep. AND, this was established before the toddler power games.
Our lives are significantly and materially improved.