my blood-boiling anger day
here's that big ol' scream-a-thon i mentioned in my last post. let me tell you i was pissed. i still am rather miffed at several people, but i'm used to it.
this isn't actually big in terms of length. but it is big in terms of concept. it ended up saying a lot. and someone will get mad at me when they read it, though no one has a right to. which begs the question, why am i posting this at all? maybe it's a test of who really listens.
This entry wasn't triggered by anyone in particular. but because i have said that as clearly as i possibly could, nobody will believe it. so let's pick a scapegoat. to satisfy both your needs and mine, i'll say it's ___'s fault. that way you all get to think i'm blaming someone and i'm also not singling anyone out. so. ___. ___ is an infuriating person.
It is one thing to interpret something differently than myself. i have never attacked anyone for that. EVER. It's one thing to get the wrong idea from something i wrote. fine. I write the way i speak and that doesn't always translate. just expect to be "corrected", if you will, so that we're on the same page.
But it is quite another to take something random out of my - i dunno, let's just go with LJ post - and try to make it ammunition. Against myself OR you. It is quite another to read sentences selectively or to remember them selectively in order to make your point.
You can't make me bad, or mean, or wrong for that matter with just a collage of my own words. And you can't "enforce" your argument with just a collage of unrelated events. I have never and refuse to do so for anyone else, so why is it okay to do to me?
I don't care how many implications or double-entendres or sneak-attacks are littered through the written thoughts of everyone else in the world. My writing has NONE. I say what i feel and i write what i say because i'm not ashamed of it. And because no one can in good concience attack me for speaking my mind.
If i meant something different than what i wrote, i would have written that. Don't you get it? Do you know me at all? Clearly not.
___ Logic is obviously different from normal logic. I get that and i've accepted it (just like everything else). But even ___ Logic can't encompass making shit UP to take offence to! Cut me some fucking slack!
Maybe it's because i'm 17. Maybe it's because i'm a woman. Maybe it's because i think with my heart. Maybe it's because my words and actions are almost entirely devoid of dramatics or hidden meanings and nobody around here is used to that.
But whatever the reason, Becky Brinkman just doesn't seem to be allowed to be right. Not when she makes an accurate prediction (meaning no one is wrong), not when she wins an argument (meaning somebody IS wrong - damn.), not when she gives her opinion on anything.
Great guys. Thanks. If you can't grasp the simplicity and honesty of what i write, then maybe i shouldn't write at all. Or, maybe you should fuck off and grow a brain. I really thought that adults could comprehend something as elementary as speaking your mind. I guess that's one thing i am wrong about. Favor: Don't FUCKING put words in my mouth, allright? At least try that. It can't be too hard. I mean, my true friends have been doing it for years.
Comments are disabled because i didn't ask any questions. therefore, no answers are required. of course, i can only imagine what you'll be thinking to yourselves the "real reason" might be. probably something about me not being able to handle hearing i'm wrong. who knows.
well to that i say you have paid absolutely no attention at all. and bullshit.
this isn't actually big in terms of length. but it is big in terms of concept. it ended up saying a lot. and someone will get mad at me when they read it, though no one has a right to. which begs the question, why am i posting this at all? maybe it's a test of who really listens.
This entry wasn't triggered by anyone in particular. but because i have said that as clearly as i possibly could, nobody will believe it. so let's pick a scapegoat. to satisfy both your needs and mine, i'll say it's ___'s fault. that way you all get to think i'm blaming someone and i'm also not singling anyone out. so. ___. ___ is an infuriating person.
It is one thing to interpret something differently than myself. i have never attacked anyone for that. EVER. It's one thing to get the wrong idea from something i wrote. fine. I write the way i speak and that doesn't always translate. just expect to be "corrected", if you will, so that we're on the same page.
But it is quite another to take something random out of my - i dunno, let's just go with LJ post - and try to make it ammunition. Against myself OR you. It is quite another to read sentences selectively or to remember them selectively in order to make your point.
You can't make me bad, or mean, or wrong for that matter with just a collage of my own words. And you can't "enforce" your argument with just a collage of unrelated events. I have never and refuse to do so for anyone else, so why is it okay to do to me?
I don't care how many implications or double-entendres or sneak-attacks are littered through the written thoughts of everyone else in the world. My writing has NONE. I say what i feel and i write what i say because i'm not ashamed of it. And because no one can in good concience attack me for speaking my mind.
If i meant something different than what i wrote, i would have written that. Don't you get it? Do you know me at all? Clearly not.
___ Logic is obviously different from normal logic. I get that and i've accepted it (just like everything else). But even ___ Logic can't encompass making shit UP to take offence to! Cut me some fucking slack!
Maybe it's because i'm 17. Maybe it's because i'm a woman. Maybe it's because i think with my heart. Maybe it's because my words and actions are almost entirely devoid of dramatics or hidden meanings and nobody around here is used to that.
But whatever the reason, Becky Brinkman just doesn't seem to be allowed to be right. Not when she makes an accurate prediction (meaning no one is wrong), not when she wins an argument (meaning somebody IS wrong - damn.), not when she gives her opinion on anything.
Great guys. Thanks. If you can't grasp the simplicity and honesty of what i write, then maybe i shouldn't write at all. Or, maybe you should fuck off and grow a brain. I really thought that adults could comprehend something as elementary as speaking your mind. I guess that's one thing i am wrong about. Favor: Don't FUCKING put words in my mouth, allright? At least try that. It can't be too hard. I mean, my true friends have been doing it for years.
Comments are disabled because i didn't ask any questions. therefore, no answers are required. of course, i can only imagine what you'll be thinking to yourselves the "real reason" might be. probably something about me not being able to handle hearing i'm wrong. who knows.
well to that i say you have paid absolutely no attention at all. and bullshit.