Hey heres something you should print out and take to ROTC
Military Cadances:
The Suprise Jump
Late last night, it was drizzling rain,
Lying in bed I was feeling no pain.
I heard a ringing in my head,
It was the telephone, so I jumped from my bed.
I tripped, stumbled, and said hello,
My first sergeant said it was time to go.
I got to the company, hungry as could be,
The platoon sergeant gave me an "MRE".
Chute on my back, destination unknown,
C-130 it began to groan.
Jumpmaster said now don't you know,
Stand up trooper, it's time to go.
Stand up, hook up, shuffle to the door,
Jump right out and count to four.
As I floated to the ground,
I began to look around.
Lights were shining up at me,
Where, oh, where could I be?
Jumpmaster, he had missed his spot,
This LZ was mighty hot.
Shake, fries and a "Big Mac" to go,
We landed at McDonalds, don't cha know
First Formation
First formation it was pouring rain,
1 SG said it was time for pain.
Then he said extend to the right,
All you sick calls get out of my sight.
Spent last night out drinkin' gin,
Knew for sure I'd see it again.
Pushup, situps, run in place,
1 SG was setting a helluva pace.
High jumper, lunger, and body twist,
So many others too numerous to list.
By the time we assembled to the right,
I was praying with all my might.
1 SG spotted me in my daze,
Said where've you been the last couple of days?
Told him I spent them with my girl,
Oh, how she makes my head swirl.
1 SG said that's well and fine,
But today, hero, your ass is mine.
How many times do I have to say,
If you play the game you got to pay
this one Mike will like
A-10 Pilots
A10 pilots flying high
A10 pilots flying by
Looking down let's have some fun
5 little commies watch them run
Air Force pilots sing their song
I just love to drop napalm
5 little commies in the grassWatch that A10 light their ass
4 Little commies down by the lake
Come on people watch them bake
3 little commies in the hut
Watch that napalm light their but
2 little commies jump in the cave
Come on napalm make their grave
1 little commie's getting hot
Watch that napalm hit the spot
A10 pilots in the sun
A10 pilots out for fun
Air Force pilots sing their song
Backwoods Johnny
Backwoods Johnny was a wrestlin' fool.
He wrestled alligators on his way toschool.
He'd stroke their bellies and throw'em in a sack,
and run off to school with a gator on his back.
Teacher seen him coming, jump on a chair.
She yelled at Johnny, "Get your gator outta here!"
Johnny replied as he took his seat,
"You better mind your manners 'cause mygator wants some meat!"
lol...
Irene
Irene's her name
She's one of the best.
So every night
I give her the test.
She looks so pretty.
So sleek, so slim.
The moon is bright
the lights are dim.
I've seen her stripped.
I've seen her bare,
I've felt her over everywhere.
I handled her just as gentle as I could.
And when I got in her
I knew she was good.
I rolled her over on her side
Then on her back I also tried.
She's just one big thrill
the best in the land.
She's an F-16
in the Air Combat Command.
Sally Brown
There was a girl
called Sally Brown
Said no man
could lay her down.
Then over the hill
came perfect Pete
He was 50 pounds
of swingin' meat.
He lay Sally down
in the grass
And shoved his dick
up her ass.
Sally let out
a ripper fart
Blew Pete's balls
20 feet apart.
Over that hill
went Perfect Pete's
50 pounds
of damaged meat.
CHOW
Up in the morning, before day
I don't like it, no way
Eat my breakfast too damn soon
Hungry as hell by noon
Went to the mess sergeant on my knees
Said "mess SGT., mess SGT. feed me please"
Mess SGT. said with a big wide grin
"If you wanna be Waterborne, you gotta be thin"
JESSE JAMES
Jesse James said before he died
There's five things that he wanted to ride
Bicycle, tricycle, automobile
An M-1 tank and a ferris wheel
Jesse James said in his final will
He had five things that he wanted to kill
A lion, a tiger, a kangaroo
A long haired hippie, and instructor too
And ifen he could kill just one
He'd kill the instructor, let the hippie run
BLACK BERETS
Six hundred green berets
Caught in a valley by the NVA
Billy was worried, didn't know what to do
So he called on me and you
We jumped on in in the middle of the night
Looks like another bloody fire fight
I set my weapon on Rock n Roll
I boogied and woogied and continued to stroll
Killing Communists just for fun
High body count now two for one
If you got trouble in the world today
Just call on the men of the black beret!
Down by the river
Da-da-down by the rive-r,
we took a little walk,
ran in into some Drill Sergents,
had a little talk,
we didnt like there attitude or the the way they walked ,
so we pushed em' (hey)
shoved em'(Hey)
through them in the river laughted as the drowed ,
cause we dont need no Drill Sergents,
hanging around,
Chorse:
Hey dont be a fool somebody said we where number 2 (haha) but where number one..
hey heres two other versons of count the cadance(we like to use these)
Count cadence, Ugly cadence, count cadnce count
FORMATION: U
CALLER: For your mama
FOR: G
CALL: For your daddy too
FOR: L
CALL: For your girlfriend
FOR: Y
CALL: Cause she's ugly too (Or: hell I don't know why)
FOR: U
CALL: Hit it
FOR: G
CALL: Hit it
FOR: L
CALL: Hit it
FOR:Y
ALL: U-G-L-Y U-G-L-Y. You're ugly! You're ugly! Your mama says you're ugly. HOOAH!!!
coke
C
In a bottle
O
In a can
K
Wish I had one
E
in my hand!
C
drink it!
O
Slam it!
K
Chug it!
E
Jug it!
little bird remix
Little kitten, baby cat
sitting on my welcome mat,
Picked him up and made him purr,
Then I ripped out all his fur.
Little mouse with little feet,
sitting on my toilet seat,
Pushed him in and flused him down,
Watched that basterd spin around.
(sung to the tune of "a yellow bird")
C: The prettiest girl
F: The prettiest girl
C: I ever saw
F: I ever saw
C: was sipping bourbon
F: was sipping bourbon
C: through a straw
F: Through a straw
C: The prettiest girl
F: The prettiest girl
C: I ever saw
F: I ever saw
F: was sipping bourbon (stomp), through a straw.
I walked right up
I sat right down
I ordered up
another round.
I placed my hand
upon her knee
she said GI
your teasing me.
I placed my hand
upon her thigh
she said GI
that's way too high.
I picked her up
I laid her down
her long blond hair
lay all around.
the wedding was
a formal one
her daddy had
a white shotgun.
and now I've got
a mother-in-law
and 14 kids
who call me pa.
V-I-C-T-O-R-Y
Victory, Victory that's our battle cry
9 in the front and 6 to the rear
That's the way we do it here
If I die on the ol' drop zone
Box me up and ship me home
Tell my mom I did my best
Pin my medals upon her chest
Tell my DS I did my best
and that I was buried in the leaning rest.
Join the Party
Come along and join the party.
Come along and have some fun.
We're the guys from the US Army.
Dropping rounds on everyone.
Throw some candy to the children.
Await until they gather round.
Lock and load your M-16.
And blow those little suckers down.
Walk up into their school house.
Await until you hear the bell.
Pull a pin from a grenade and
send those bastards straight to hell.
McDonalds Psycho
Going to McDonalds.
To get a coke and fry,
That's when the psycho
caught me by surprise.
People started running,
heading for the door.
That's when the psycho
shot at twenty more.
Ronald McDonald
looking at the dead.
That's when the psycho
shot him in the head.
Next time I'm hungry.
I'll do the right thing,
and take my business,
on to Burger King.
Hey sorry bout the language in this one
Walking Down My Street
Walking down my street knocking on every door
God damn son of a bitch I couldn't find the whore
Finnaly found the whore she was tall and thin
God damn son of a bitch I couldn't get it in
Finnaly got it in swished it all about,
God damn son of a bitch I couldn't get it out
Finnaly got it out it was red and sore,
God damn son of a bitch I finnaly fucked the whore
The moral of the story when knocking on every door
God damn son of a bitch never fuck the whore
this is just weird version of A little bird
A little bird
with a little beak
was sitten on
my toliet seat
I pushed him in
I flushed him down
I watched his ass
go round and round
A Yellow bird
a yellow bill
was sitten on
my window sill
I lured him in
with a piece of bread
then I smashed
his yellow head
A bigger bird
with a bigger bill
was sitten on
my window sill
I lured him in
with a piece of bread
then I smashed
his bigger head
The docter came
to check their heads
he said for sure
these birds arnt dead
Oh me Oh my
I'm such a clutz
I missed their heads
and crushed their nuts
The morale of
this story is
if ya cant get head
really loud use your bread!
Or you can say
...
and then I kissed
his little head.
The moral of
the story is clear.
If you kiss a bird
you're probably queer.
Or...
The moral of
the story is
to get some head
you need some bread!
A Night in the Ville
Went to Kinville with Smitty and Will
To spend some money and get some thrills
Walked in the door and before I could blink
Some liittle lady said "BUY ME A DRINK"
Was a crazy sight ,thought I'd seen it all
There were women crawliin' from wall to wall
I reached in my pocket for a dollar twenty-four
She said to buy my drink you gotta pay 10 more
I said are you playing some kinda joke?
It's only two-fifty for a rum and coke!
She said "i'm kinda' lonely and I need a date
Ten bucks a drink is the going rate.
I put my cash away and I started to go
Cause Willie D. said "Let a ho be a ho"
I felt a little sorry for the bar girl troupe
Did'nt know they'd take my ass to the hoop!
Bought the girl a drink and I knew I was doomed,
Ten horny squids sat across the room.
Paid the bar fine and I grbbed her tit,
She said buy me some dinner, and I'll luv' ya no shit!
Stopped for Yakisoba then she said to me
Drive me to the alley cause I've got to pee
She walked down the alley and I leaned against the car
Then I was attacked by the squids from the bar!
Swung my tow chain and I tied em' in knots,
The girl was pissin' but she never did squat,
Looked a little closer and I knew I'd be sick,
The girl didn't squat because she had a dick!
She said "come with me and we'll make the time pass,
I said " you need a lift , shove a jack up your ass!"
Pulled out her pistol said "You're gonna be a ghost",
I shot my flame thrower and I turned her to toast!
Smitty grabbed the pistol and Will just ran,
Just another day in the "Land of the Hand"
(this is funny)
Up Jumped a Monkey
Up jumped the monkey from the coconut grove
he was a mean mother fucker, you could tell by his clothes.
He wore a two button ditty,and a three button stitch
he was a loud mouth-mother fuckin,son of a bitch!
He lined a hundred women, up against the wall
and bet anyone, he could fuck them all.
He fucked 98 till his balls turn blue,
Then he backed off, jacked off, and fucked the other two!!!
Note: you can also sing this version
Airborne Ranger was a hell of a man!
Walked through the bar with his cock in his hand!
Shit on the table and pissed on the floor.
Then wiped his ass with a "44."
Lined a hundred women up against the wall.
Bet a hundred bucks he could fuck them all.
Fucked 98 till his cock turned blue.
Up-chucked, jammed up, fucked the other two.
When he died he went to hell.
Fucked the devil's wife and his daughter as well.
On his grave stone it read in green:
Here lies a human FUCKING MACHINE
WHAT'S UP(double-time):
YALL GONNA MAKE ME LOSE MY MIND
(REPEAT)
UP IN HERE
(REPEAT)
AMERICA'S GONNA GO ALL OUT
(REPEAT)
UP IN HERE
(REPEAT)
TERRORISTS TRYIN TO ACT THE FOOL
(REPEAT)
UP IN HERE
(REPEAT)
AMERICA HAS DONE LOST IT'S COOL
(REPEAT)
WERE GONNA BRING IT TO YOU
AND IT'S GONNA BE QUICK
(REPEAT)
ALL YOU TERRORISTS MAKE ME SICK
(REPEAT)
WHAT THE HELL YOU SMOKIN ON?
(REPEAT)
THINK IT'S TIME WE BITCH SLAPPED
THE TALIBAN
(REPEAT)
ARMY!
(REPEAT)
LOAD UP!
(REPEAT)
AIRBORNE!
(REPEAT)
HOOK UP!
(REPEAT)
NAVY!
(REPEAT)
BLOW EM UP!
(REPEAT)
AIR FORCE!
(REPEAT)
SHOOT EM UP!
(REPEAT)
MARINES!
(REPEAT)
SLICE EM UP!
(REPEAT)
FREEDOM!
(REPEAT)
THAT'S WHAT'S UP!
well dang thats a lot it took like 4 hours to write...hope you like
The Suprise Jump
Late last night, it was drizzling rain,
Lying in bed I was feeling no pain.
I heard a ringing in my head,
It was the telephone, so I jumped from my bed.
I tripped, stumbled, and said hello,
My first sergeant said it was time to go.
I got to the company, hungry as could be,
The platoon sergeant gave me an "MRE".
Chute on my back, destination unknown,
C-130 it began to groan.
Jumpmaster said now don't you know,
Stand up trooper, it's time to go.
Stand up, hook up, shuffle to the door,
Jump right out and count to four.
As I floated to the ground,
I began to look around.
Lights were shining up at me,
Where, oh, where could I be?
Jumpmaster, he had missed his spot,
This LZ was mighty hot.
Shake, fries and a "Big Mac" to go,
We landed at McDonalds, don't cha know
First Formation
First formation it was pouring rain,
1 SG said it was time for pain.
Then he said extend to the right,
All you sick calls get out of my sight.
Spent last night out drinkin' gin,
Knew for sure I'd see it again.
Pushup, situps, run in place,
1 SG was setting a helluva pace.
High jumper, lunger, and body twist,
So many others too numerous to list.
By the time we assembled to the right,
I was praying with all my might.
1 SG spotted me in my daze,
Said where've you been the last couple of days?
Told him I spent them with my girl,
Oh, how she makes my head swirl.
1 SG said that's well and fine,
But today, hero, your ass is mine.
How many times do I have to say,
If you play the game you got to pay
this one Mike will like
A-10 Pilots
A10 pilots flying high
A10 pilots flying by
Looking down let's have some fun
5 little commies watch them run
Air Force pilots sing their song
I just love to drop napalm
5 little commies in the grassWatch that A10 light their ass
4 Little commies down by the lake
Come on people watch them bake
3 little commies in the hut
Watch that napalm light their but
2 little commies jump in the cave
Come on napalm make their grave
1 little commie's getting hot
Watch that napalm hit the spot
A10 pilots in the sun
A10 pilots out for fun
Air Force pilots sing their song
Backwoods Johnny
Backwoods Johnny was a wrestlin' fool.
He wrestled alligators on his way toschool.
He'd stroke their bellies and throw'em in a sack,
and run off to school with a gator on his back.
Teacher seen him coming, jump on a chair.
She yelled at Johnny, "Get your gator outta here!"
Johnny replied as he took his seat,
"You better mind your manners 'cause mygator wants some meat!"
lol...
Irene
Irene's her name
She's one of the best.
So every night
I give her the test.
She looks so pretty.
So sleek, so slim.
The moon is bright
the lights are dim.
I've seen her stripped.
I've seen her bare,
I've felt her over everywhere.
I handled her just as gentle as I could.
And when I got in her
I knew she was good.
I rolled her over on her side
Then on her back I also tried.
She's just one big thrill
the best in the land.
She's an F-16
in the Air Combat Command.
Sally Brown
There was a girl
called Sally Brown
Said no man
could lay her down.
Then over the hill
came perfect Pete
He was 50 pounds
of swingin' meat.
He lay Sally down
in the grass
And shoved his dick
up her ass.
Sally let out
a ripper fart
Blew Pete's balls
20 feet apart.
Over that hill
went Perfect Pete's
50 pounds
of damaged meat.
CHOW
Up in the morning, before day
I don't like it, no way
Eat my breakfast too damn soon
Hungry as hell by noon
Went to the mess sergeant on my knees
Said "mess SGT., mess SGT. feed me please"
Mess SGT. said with a big wide grin
"If you wanna be Waterborne, you gotta be thin"
JESSE JAMES
Jesse James said before he died
There's five things that he wanted to ride
Bicycle, tricycle, automobile
An M-1 tank and a ferris wheel
Jesse James said in his final will
He had five things that he wanted to kill
A lion, a tiger, a kangaroo
A long haired hippie, and instructor too
And ifen he could kill just one
He'd kill the instructor, let the hippie run
BLACK BERETS
Six hundred green berets
Caught in a valley by the NVA
Billy was worried, didn't know what to do
So he called on me and you
We jumped on in in the middle of the night
Looks like another bloody fire fight
I set my weapon on Rock n Roll
I boogied and woogied and continued to stroll
Killing Communists just for fun
High body count now two for one
If you got trouble in the world today
Just call on the men of the black beret!
Down by the river
Da-da-down by the rive-r,
we took a little walk,
ran in into some Drill Sergents,
had a little talk,
we didnt like there attitude or the the way they walked ,
so we pushed em' (hey)
shoved em'(Hey)
through them in the river laughted as the drowed ,
cause we dont need no Drill Sergents,
hanging around,
Chorse:
Hey dont be a fool somebody said we where number 2 (haha) but where number one..
hey heres two other versons of count the cadance(we like to use these)
Count cadence, Ugly cadence, count cadnce count
FORMATION: U
CALLER: For your mama
FOR: G
CALL: For your daddy too
FOR: L
CALL: For your girlfriend
FOR: Y
CALL: Cause she's ugly too (Or: hell I don't know why)
FOR: U
CALL: Hit it
FOR: G
CALL: Hit it
FOR: L
CALL: Hit it
FOR:Y
ALL: U-G-L-Y U-G-L-Y. You're ugly! You're ugly! Your mama says you're ugly. HOOAH!!!
coke
C
In a bottle
O
In a can
K
Wish I had one
E
in my hand!
C
drink it!
O
Slam it!
K
Chug it!
E
Jug it!
little bird remix
Little kitten, baby cat
sitting on my welcome mat,
Picked him up and made him purr,
Then I ripped out all his fur.
Little mouse with little feet,
sitting on my toilet seat,
Pushed him in and flused him down,
Watched that basterd spin around.
(sung to the tune of "a yellow bird")
C: The prettiest girl
F: The prettiest girl
C: I ever saw
F: I ever saw
C: was sipping bourbon
F: was sipping bourbon
C: through a straw
F: Through a straw
C: The prettiest girl
F: The prettiest girl
C: I ever saw
F: I ever saw
F: was sipping bourbon (stomp), through a straw.
I walked right up
I sat right down
I ordered up
another round.
I placed my hand
upon her knee
she said GI
your teasing me.
I placed my hand
upon her thigh
she said GI
that's way too high.
I picked her up
I laid her down
her long blond hair
lay all around.
the wedding was
a formal one
her daddy had
a white shotgun.
and now I've got
a mother-in-law
and 14 kids
who call me pa.
V-I-C-T-O-R-Y
Victory, Victory that's our battle cry
9 in the front and 6 to the rear
That's the way we do it here
If I die on the ol' drop zone
Box me up and ship me home
Tell my mom I did my best
Pin my medals upon her chest
Tell my DS I did my best
and that I was buried in the leaning rest.
Join the Party
Come along and join the party.
Come along and have some fun.
We're the guys from the US Army.
Dropping rounds on everyone.
Throw some candy to the children.
Await until they gather round.
Lock and load your M-16.
And blow those little suckers down.
Walk up into their school house.
Await until you hear the bell.
Pull a pin from a grenade and
send those bastards straight to hell.
McDonalds Psycho
Going to McDonalds.
To get a coke and fry,
That's when the psycho
caught me by surprise.
People started running,
heading for the door.
That's when the psycho
shot at twenty more.
Ronald McDonald
looking at the dead.
That's when the psycho
shot him in the head.
Next time I'm hungry.
I'll do the right thing,
and take my business,
on to Burger King.
Hey sorry bout the language in this one
Walking Down My Street
Walking down my street knocking on every door
God damn son of a bitch I couldn't find the whore
Finnaly found the whore she was tall and thin
God damn son of a bitch I couldn't get it in
Finnaly got it in swished it all about,
God damn son of a bitch I couldn't get it out
Finnaly got it out it was red and sore,
God damn son of a bitch I finnaly fucked the whore
The moral of the story when knocking on every door
God damn son of a bitch never fuck the whore
this is just weird version of A little bird
A little bird
with a little beak
was sitten on
my toliet seat
I pushed him in
I flushed him down
I watched his ass
go round and round
A Yellow bird
a yellow bill
was sitten on
my window sill
I lured him in
with a piece of bread
then I smashed
his yellow head
A bigger bird
with a bigger bill
was sitten on
my window sill
I lured him in
with a piece of bread
then I smashed
his bigger head
The docter came
to check their heads
he said for sure
these birds arnt dead
Oh me Oh my
I'm such a clutz
I missed their heads
and crushed their nuts
The morale of
this story is
if ya cant get head
really loud use your bread!
Or you can say
...
and then I kissed
his little head.
The moral of
the story is clear.
If you kiss a bird
you're probably queer.
Or...
The moral of
the story is
to get some head
you need some bread!
A Night in the Ville
Went to Kinville with Smitty and Will
To spend some money and get some thrills
Walked in the door and before I could blink
Some liittle lady said "BUY ME A DRINK"
Was a crazy sight ,thought I'd seen it all
There were women crawliin' from wall to wall
I reached in my pocket for a dollar twenty-four
She said to buy my drink you gotta pay 10 more
I said are you playing some kinda joke?
It's only two-fifty for a rum and coke!
She said "i'm kinda' lonely and I need a date
Ten bucks a drink is the going rate.
I put my cash away and I started to go
Cause Willie D. said "Let a ho be a ho"
I felt a little sorry for the bar girl troupe
Did'nt know they'd take my ass to the hoop!
Bought the girl a drink and I knew I was doomed,
Ten horny squids sat across the room.
Paid the bar fine and I grbbed her tit,
She said buy me some dinner, and I'll luv' ya no shit!
Stopped for Yakisoba then she said to me
Drive me to the alley cause I've got to pee
She walked down the alley and I leaned against the car
Then I was attacked by the squids from the bar!
Swung my tow chain and I tied em' in knots,
The girl was pissin' but she never did squat,
Looked a little closer and I knew I'd be sick,
The girl didn't squat because she had a dick!
She said "come with me and we'll make the time pass,
I said " you need a lift , shove a jack up your ass!"
Pulled out her pistol said "You're gonna be a ghost",
I shot my flame thrower and I turned her to toast!
Smitty grabbed the pistol and Will just ran,
Just another day in the "Land of the Hand"
(this is funny)
Up Jumped a Monkey
Up jumped the monkey from the coconut grove
he was a mean mother fucker, you could tell by his clothes.
He wore a two button ditty,and a three button stitch
he was a loud mouth-mother fuckin,son of a bitch!
He lined a hundred women, up against the wall
and bet anyone, he could fuck them all.
He fucked 98 till his balls turn blue,
Then he backed off, jacked off, and fucked the other two!!!
Note: you can also sing this version
Airborne Ranger was a hell of a man!
Walked through the bar with his cock in his hand!
Shit on the table and pissed on the floor.
Then wiped his ass with a "44."
Lined a hundred women up against the wall.
Bet a hundred bucks he could fuck them all.
Fucked 98 till his cock turned blue.
Up-chucked, jammed up, fucked the other two.
When he died he went to hell.
Fucked the devil's wife and his daughter as well.
On his grave stone it read in green:
Here lies a human FUCKING MACHINE
WHAT'S UP(double-time):
YALL GONNA MAKE ME LOSE MY MIND
(REPEAT)
UP IN HERE
(REPEAT)
AMERICA'S GONNA GO ALL OUT
(REPEAT)
UP IN HERE
(REPEAT)
TERRORISTS TRYIN TO ACT THE FOOL
(REPEAT)
UP IN HERE
(REPEAT)
AMERICA HAS DONE LOST IT'S COOL
(REPEAT)
WERE GONNA BRING IT TO YOU
AND IT'S GONNA BE QUICK
(REPEAT)
ALL YOU TERRORISTS MAKE ME SICK
(REPEAT)
WHAT THE HELL YOU SMOKIN ON?
(REPEAT)
THINK IT'S TIME WE BITCH SLAPPED
THE TALIBAN
(REPEAT)
ARMY!
(REPEAT)
LOAD UP!
(REPEAT)
AIRBORNE!
(REPEAT)
HOOK UP!
(REPEAT)
NAVY!
(REPEAT)
BLOW EM UP!
(REPEAT)
AIR FORCE!
(REPEAT)
SHOOT EM UP!
(REPEAT)
MARINES!
(REPEAT)
SLICE EM UP!
(REPEAT)
FREEDOM!
(REPEAT)
THAT'S WHAT'S UP!
well dang thats a lot it took like 4 hours to write...hope you like