Learning to Roll
On Sunday, I had my first roller derby practice. The results are as follows:
First, I need to learn how to not look like a total ass on quad skates.
Okay, I don't exactly look like a total ass, but I feel like I'm learning to skate all over again. I can inline skate very well, but I hadn't been on quad skates since I was...10? Maybe? And I've had lots of bruises fun discovering that it's completely different. Everything my feet knew about skates, from center of gravity, maneuverability, balance and rhythm...well, all of that is now outdated information and instead of using it to go where I want to go, it's causing my ass to become closely acquainted with the floor at high speeds.
I'm also getting used to a speed skate, which is a low top skate. Derby skates are also leather. Inline skates have a soft inner boot and a hard plastic outer boot. So the change is from something that feels like a ski boot to something that feels like a stiff athletic shoe. That's strange enough, but skating in these low top skates has brought to my attention that my ankles are far more pussy than I thought.
There were also a few minor injuries. These amounted to a burn on my elbow, an aspiring blister on my foot, and bruises on both of my hips, reducing my sleeping options to back, stomach, and awkward half-stomach, half-side.
Sam asked, "Did you take anyone the fuck out?"
My answer: "Only myself."
Although after causing myself to fall in spectacular fashion during a drill, I was cheered by the other girls for scrambling to my skates quickly, rather than lying there nursing my new and compounding hematomas. The truth is that I got my ass off the floor lickety-split only because I had no desire to get run over.
I had a lot of fun at the practice though, and I get to do it again tomorrow. I'm also lined up for a skate clinic with Whip Me, which I'm looking forward to because she's also an inline and ice skater and will understand the ways in which my feet are being stupid on quad skates.
Sweetart's opinion is that it'll take me about a month to adjust to the skates. Then I can start killing girls. I can't wait.
First, I need to learn how to not look like a total ass on quad skates.
Okay, I don't exactly look like a total ass, but I feel like I'm learning to skate all over again. I can inline skate very well, but I hadn't been on quad skates since I was...10? Maybe? And I've had lots of bruises fun discovering that it's completely different. Everything my feet knew about skates, from center of gravity, maneuverability, balance and rhythm...well, all of that is now outdated information and instead of using it to go where I want to go, it's causing my ass to become closely acquainted with the floor at high speeds.
I'm also getting used to a speed skate, which is a low top skate. Derby skates are also leather. Inline skates have a soft inner boot and a hard plastic outer boot. So the change is from something that feels like a ski boot to something that feels like a stiff athletic shoe. That's strange enough, but skating in these low top skates has brought to my attention that my ankles are far more pussy than I thought.
There were also a few minor injuries. These amounted to a burn on my elbow, an aspiring blister on my foot, and bruises on both of my hips, reducing my sleeping options to back, stomach, and awkward half-stomach, half-side.
Sam asked, "Did you take anyone the fuck out?"
My answer: "Only myself."
Although after causing myself to fall in spectacular fashion during a drill, I was cheered by the other girls for scrambling to my skates quickly, rather than lying there nursing my new and compounding hematomas. The truth is that I got my ass off the floor lickety-split only because I had no desire to get run over.
I had a lot of fun at the practice though, and I get to do it again tomorrow. I'm also lined up for a skate clinic with Whip Me, which I'm looking forward to because she's also an inline and ice skater and will understand the ways in which my feet are being stupid on quad skates.
Sweetart's opinion is that it'll take me about a month to adjust to the skates. Then I can start killing girls. I can't wait.