yesterday I was not, today I am. yesterday I was, today I am not.
One week ago at this time, I was at my desk downtown drinking bourbon from a plastic cup. I had a bottle of it in the office saved for a special occasion, but the occasion turned out to be my unemployment. That morning's meeting was very glum, as about 1/4 of the participants would not see another one. The merger had failed, and with it our jobs. The company was out of gas, on the side of the road, and some of us were left to hitch our way home while the tow truck came.
This was not the exit I imagined, though I knew it was a possibility. Obviously it's not the exit I wanted. Nobody sticks with a company through all the hard times we had if they know that their loyalty will amount to jack squat, and be more likely to leave them eating a steady diet of government cheese than cashing out million-dollar options and becoming a Google Fellow.
For the rest of last week I learned how to look for work in the programming world, got in touch with some recruiters for the first time, and wrapped up our codebase as best I could for those who would be staying. I'm thankful for my team lead's help in referrals and job searching tips, I think without his mentoring I would be out on my ass with no clue what to do next. By Friday I had back-to-back calls and meetings all afternoon. By the end of the day my phone was exhausted and so was I. We did a last-hurrah happy hour at the Frontier room which we managed to get the company to pay for... by leaving before paying our tabs.
Kristin came up this weekend, so we spent Saturday enjoying a quiet Valentine's day together cooking and seeing Whitney dance. On Sunday we went to dinner at Buddha Ruksa for our "official" v-day dinner. After that, I took her to Seacrest Marina Park, where we picnicked for our first date, and was honored to ask for and be granted her hand in marriage.
This was not quite the proposal I imagined, but it was the one I planned. It's not best to start an engagement with no job, but delaying until I had that fixed would have thrown a big wrench in a well-laid plan. I feel like it was a hand extended in trust, for me to say I know things are uncertain, but about you I am certain. Two major life situations changed in one weekend, maybe I wanted to replace one rug pulled from under me by putting down a new one.
Little about the process of engagement is obvious or certain. There are no books to read, just principles to follow. So in a process so uncertain, throwing job loss into the mix seems like a shoulder-shrugging change, even if it causes me to debate endlessly with myself.
So that brings me to today, when I attended another company meeting, this time as a ghost, an ex-employee just popping in to clean out his desk. It took a while. A year and a half at a desk and the stuff piles up. But it all moves out just the same.
As I carried the contents of my desk to the elevator, I said a muddled goodbye to the eight who remained. Only six were employees. I hired all of them.
This was not the exit I imagined, though I knew it was a possibility. Obviously it's not the exit I wanted. Nobody sticks with a company through all the hard times we had if they know that their loyalty will amount to jack squat, and be more likely to leave them eating a steady diet of government cheese than cashing out million-dollar options and becoming a Google Fellow.
For the rest of last week I learned how to look for work in the programming world, got in touch with some recruiters for the first time, and wrapped up our codebase as best I could for those who would be staying. I'm thankful for my team lead's help in referrals and job searching tips, I think without his mentoring I would be out on my ass with no clue what to do next. By Friday I had back-to-back calls and meetings all afternoon. By the end of the day my phone was exhausted and so was I. We did a last-hurrah happy hour at the Frontier room which we managed to get the company to pay for... by leaving before paying our tabs.
Kristin came up this weekend, so we spent Saturday enjoying a quiet Valentine's day together cooking and seeing Whitney dance. On Sunday we went to dinner at Buddha Ruksa for our "official" v-day dinner. After that, I took her to Seacrest Marina Park, where we picnicked for our first date, and was honored to ask for and be granted her hand in marriage.
This was not quite the proposal I imagined, but it was the one I planned. It's not best to start an engagement with no job, but delaying until I had that fixed would have thrown a big wrench in a well-laid plan. I feel like it was a hand extended in trust, for me to say I know things are uncertain, but about you I am certain. Two major life situations changed in one weekend, maybe I wanted to replace one rug pulled from under me by putting down a new one.
Little about the process of engagement is obvious or certain. There are no books to read, just principles to follow. So in a process so uncertain, throwing job loss into the mix seems like a shoulder-shrugging change, even if it causes me to debate endlessly with myself.
So that brings me to today, when I attended another company meeting, this time as a ghost, an ex-employee just popping in to clean out his desk. It took a while. A year and a half at a desk and the stuff piles up. But it all moves out just the same.
As I carried the contents of my desk to the elevator, I said a muddled goodbye to the eight who remained. Only six were employees. I hired all of them.