Author vs. Fan
Author vs. Fan
As you may have gathered, I only write for the Final Fantasy VIII fandom and (with the exception of No Mercy) I only write Squall and Rinoa couplings. An obstacle most writers may come across is the Author vs. the Fan, where a part of you - the Fan, just wants everything to be a bed full of roses, for the characters to say they love each other and promise not to let anything break them up. However, there is the other part - the Author. Though, knows what s/he is writing is going against everything that makes the coupling, has to make mountains out of mole hills, drag things on endlessly and ultimately make the characters suffer.
I’m not one for weird fetishes, but I often do get asked why I make them suffer. Why do I bother to break up Squall and Rinoa, only to place them back together? Or more famously, why do I write angst if I don’t like reading it? And even more to the point, what is the reason of writing angst if I’m going to make the ending sweet? I think many of these questions are raised from Friendship Isn’t Enough, Horns of a Dilemma and Amber Lights.
To answer these questions; it’s about the journey. Yeah, I blatantly stole that line from Kris, but it’s true. When I first started writing Friendship Isn’t Enough, it was just after I had completed Breaking Through Appearances, and those of you who read that will know that it’s basically just a rom-com with a slight amount of angst at the end - but nothing too serious. I had never really written a proper grueling scene between Squall and Rinoa and I had never written a story where the two had to really work at the relationship, strive to be together in the end. Let’s face it; they had to do that in-game so why should fan-fiction be any different?
Well, that was the start of my love affair with Angst genres and I couldn’t stop. Even though my endings may be sweet, or bittersweet in some cases, it’s always the journey that the characters learn from. It’s the journey that we learn by observing what they are put through.
This is where the Author vs. the Fan comes into play. While I had many people literally wanting to kill themselves, and me, to hurry on up and get Rinoa to tell Squall about Zone in Friendship Isn’t Enough, or for Squall to tell Rinoa he loved her. Believe me, it was excruciatingly tempting to have Squall fly to Deling City and say ‘I love you’ with Rinoa jumping in joy. But what would that achieve? It’s pretty pointless. They got together too easily, how would they appreciate each other when the going gets tough? So, cue my endless obstacles and downright lies. It was the Author that stepped in and took over and I soon found myself putting many things in Squall and Rinoa’s path.
While I am addressing this point, I’d also like to address the characters themselves. Now, I am a massive Squall and Rinoa fan. And by massive, I mean, I buy any game that is playable on PAL that has Squall and Rinoa as characters. I have the rings set too, don’t have the figurines because they’re so darn expensive! But I do feel very upset when other authors bash these characters unreasonably. That is the Fan speaking.
The Author however, isn’t always so kind. While I love Rinoa a lot, her character in Friendship Isn’t Enough wasn’t always to my pleasure. I know I wrote her that way, but that doesn’t mean I liked it. I’m not one for lies, I don’t like deceit and I certainly don’t support drastic decisions because things don’t go your way. But having said that, I wrote Rinoa this way as a learning curve. Sure we all love Rinoa, we want her to be correct and have Squall’s infinite love. But again, what does that truly achieve? Had I not written Rinoa with some immaturity, a tab bit self-centered, not to mention stubborn, then her actions in the end wouldn’t have weight. Her journey was to learn what Squall meant to her, how important he was, and the impact he had not only on her life, but on her character. He brought the best out in her and that is the reason why she fell in love with him in the first place.
As the author, I have faced many unpleasant reviews about Rinoa, which I must say always has to be taken with a pinch of salt. But nonetheless, when the character comes to a realisation and grows and develops as a person, it’s always wonderful to see readers re-establish that love for her.
…And that is something both the Author and the Fan enjoy.