Dec 19, 2008 15:36
for the first time today i knowingly, deliberately killed (something not a spider or an insect) in cold blood
i found a new-out-of-it's-shell baby bird on my driveway, in the sun, covered in ants
so new it still had the yolk sack attached. no way on earth i could care for it without the right equipment
and so weak i doubt it would survive
after discussion it was decided crushing would hurt it less than freezing
lacking my father or a suitably large faced tool (the head of my hatchet only being as wide as my thumb) i couldn't bring myself to stomp it so under the rear wheel of my car it went
the peace of one step of removal
its (already dead of heat stroke or ants) sibling is now in my freezer waiting on me to locate a suitable receptacle within which to place it and fill with resin, as is the other skeleton i've had for a month
the third sibling is further from perfection but if anyone would like to claim a momento mori, i could make a third resin object
the only thing i want the universe to answer is how the FUCK did i miss them on my way in?
i would rather trade lack of morbid jewelery for uncomfortable feelings