Incessant Ramble LIV

[ninth_awakening]

today i was arguing with my mom
about the usually pointless

theories that she forms in her
head about me and my life

and realized that half of what
i was saying was complete crap

"i don't swear, or get bad grades,
or do drugs, or have sex
or slack off, or lie to you, or
sneak around behind your back, or
date people you don't know about,
and yet still the accusations"

besides the drugs and sex,

i don't even have the right to
say those things anymore

so... what to do with that

lately it seems that most of what
i say is one big lie

everything that comes out of my
mouth is pointless, save a few
precious times

and who is anyone to know when
those times are?

i'm starting to believe my own lies

of course i'm a good daughter, a
good sister, a good girlfriend

of course i'm going to heaven

of course i'm still innocent

i'm not naive
or ignorant
or selfish

sometimes lies are better.