Night Drive
So monday night/tuesday morning was probably the best day of my life. I woke up 6pm monday, showered, shaved, all that jazz. Sidenote: don't think i've taken an actual razor to my face in at least half a year. Went out with friends. Started drinking very late in the evening. Went home. Had a beautiful conversation that prevented me from napping. Had one of the best drives to work on a workday in a long time. (everything about the drive went well. i did 95 the whole way. cars created the most amazing intricate framework that i weaved through like a magical needle. my windows were down and it wasn't hot. blasted every good Juanes song i hadn't heard in like a year or more. Heaven on wheels) I got to work still buzzing pretty good and feeling fantastic. I lifted a huge paper order in less time than it usually takes me to do an order half that size. I drank delicious water. Had an apple fritter for the first time in a month. It was slow but steady.
I'd like to say that it was all those things in combination that honestly made me feel better than i ever have in years, but the truth is i know there was only one reason i felt so good. It was anticipation. It was anticipation of the most uncontrollable, scary, unwelcomed, sorely needed feelings of my life. I am so afraid and so excited. I had plans, and i made stands, but this kind of a feeling doesn't happen every day. And now i gotta change my life for it. I gotta... live for it. I felt alive, is what it was. I just... felt alive. And it gets sweeter every day.
Right now, i gotta go over to chipi-chape's and spend good time with some of the best friends i'll have in my life.
Nothing ever makes sense. That's the most sense i can make out.
I'd like to say that it was all those things in combination that honestly made me feel better than i ever have in years, but the truth is i know there was only one reason i felt so good. It was anticipation. It was anticipation of the most uncontrollable, scary, unwelcomed, sorely needed feelings of my life. I am so afraid and so excited. I had plans, and i made stands, but this kind of a feeling doesn't happen every day. And now i gotta change my life for it. I gotta... live for it. I felt alive, is what it was. I just... felt alive. And it gets sweeter every day.
Right now, i gotta go over to chipi-chape's and spend good time with some of the best friends i'll have in my life.
Nothing ever makes sense. That's the most sense i can make out.