WTF is wrong with me?
This post was written in two days.
Day one (aka: EMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO)
I had just about the worst night of sleep in recent memory. I woke up at least a dozen times, and a few of those times my heart was racing and I was sweating. I guess the accumulation of stress from work and personal issues has taken its toll on me. God damn I'm tired...
Work-wise, I've had more responsibility and work shoved upon me and it's starting to get old. Long story short, the one colleague that has been around longer than me just left the company today. Between me, her, and another girl, the three of us are the pillars that keep the rest of my department running smooth. I've just spent the last eight days training with my departing colleague in order to take on all the work that only she knew how to do. I don't mind taking on some extra work in order to help out, but the amount I'm now taking on is more than I've ever had to do in eight hours. I'm getting "more responsibility" but that's it. No promotion, no raise, and I might even take a pay cut. I don't begrudge my colleague at all, I'm happy that she found a better job (she was completely taken for granted by my supervisor). Of course, when she gave her two weeks, everyone immediately turned to me and said, "Good luck, Nik, you're the daddy of the lab now"
I don't need that kind of stress put on me right now. And I can't turn down the extra work/responsibility. Just because I'm quick to help out any one when I have some spare time, doesn't mean that I can take on so much extra work at the drop of a hat. I think all of my co-workers have a misconception that I am capable of taking on any amount of work without fail. I'm only human, I screw up from time-to-time too.
This combined with personal issues as of late are just fucking me up physically and mentally.
(I literally started falling asleep from exhaustion as I typed, so I passed out and went to work)
Day 2 (Recovering)
So I slept a crap-ton better and only woke up once last night. My back was (and still is) sore as hell from sleeping in weird positions, but it actually helped me stay focussed at work because every time I started to fall into "the bad place" my aching back kept my mind off of it. Also today was day one as the new "lab daddy", it went well enough.
I came to the conclusion that I need something to focus intensely on in order to keep myself out of "the bad place", so I'm going back to my good'ol reliable keyboard and trying to transcribe music again. I've decided to make a dedicated Youtube account for my stuff and I'm requiring myself to post something at least bi-weekly, no matter how bad it is.
So I present to you:
http://www.youtube.com/user/Tardokun
I hope to have my first vid up by tomorrow.
-Nik
Day one (aka: EMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO)
I had just about the worst night of sleep in recent memory. I woke up at least a dozen times, and a few of those times my heart was racing and I was sweating. I guess the accumulation of stress from work and personal issues has taken its toll on me. God damn I'm tired...
Work-wise, I've had more responsibility and work shoved upon me and it's starting to get old. Long story short, the one colleague that has been around longer than me just left the company today. Between me, her, and another girl, the three of us are the pillars that keep the rest of my department running smooth. I've just spent the last eight days training with my departing colleague in order to take on all the work that only she knew how to do. I don't mind taking on some extra work in order to help out, but the amount I'm now taking on is more than I've ever had to do in eight hours. I'm getting "more responsibility" but that's it. No promotion, no raise, and I might even take a pay cut. I don't begrudge my colleague at all, I'm happy that she found a better job (she was completely taken for granted by my supervisor). Of course, when she gave her two weeks, everyone immediately turned to me and said, "Good luck, Nik, you're the daddy of the lab now"
I don't need that kind of stress put on me right now. And I can't turn down the extra work/responsibility. Just because I'm quick to help out any one when I have some spare time, doesn't mean that I can take on so much extra work at the drop of a hat. I think all of my co-workers have a misconception that I am capable of taking on any amount of work without fail. I'm only human, I screw up from time-to-time too.
This combined with personal issues as of late are just fucking me up physically and mentally.
(I literally started falling asleep from exhaustion as I typed, so I passed out and went to work)
Day 2 (Recovering)
So I slept a crap-ton better and only woke up once last night. My back was (and still is) sore as hell from sleeping in weird positions, but it actually helped me stay focussed at work because every time I started to fall into "the bad place" my aching back kept my mind off of it. Also today was day one as the new "lab daddy", it went well enough.
I came to the conclusion that I need something to focus intensely on in order to keep myself out of "the bad place", so I'm going back to my good'ol reliable keyboard and trying to transcribe music again. I've decided to make a dedicated Youtube account for my stuff and I'm requiring myself to post something at least bi-weekly, no matter how bad it is.
So I present to you:
http://www.youtube.com/user/Tardokun
I hope to have my first vid up by tomorrow.
-Nik