It's barely two hours into my birthday
and shit shit fucking shit, how is this worse than 19 years of shit birthdays when it was supposed to be the best?
I left Kat in her room crying and went back to my lonely, cold fucking hotel where she's supposed to be staying and I get to spend most of the day alone until our (promised) sunset on the beach, but then she has a rugby meeting she's forced to attend and I will spend the night alone, too.
She promised me, when she fucking abandoned me and James was being a fucking dick, a horrible fucking dick, that we'd have a whole weekend, just us, no James at all, and then no, fucking James sends her into a crying fit over the fucking phone and ruins my birthday anyway. That's fucking fabulous. No, really.
And all I do is bitch anymore, but I'm so fucking tired of watching someone who's the best fucking part of me be crushed by someone who's toxic, when my thoughts are already laid on the table.
And it's so pathetic, but I'm so fucking tired. So fucking tired of being crushed every time I just try, all I fucking do is try, for one thing, to be happy, just once every now and then, one happy thing to make it through another fucking week, month, half year-
I just want to be happy.
I left Kat in her room crying and went back to my lonely, cold fucking hotel where she's supposed to be staying and I get to spend most of the day alone until our (promised) sunset on the beach, but then she has a rugby meeting she's forced to attend and I will spend the night alone, too.
She promised me, when she fucking abandoned me and James was being a fucking dick, a horrible fucking dick, that we'd have a whole weekend, just us, no James at all, and then no, fucking James sends her into a crying fit over the fucking phone and ruins my birthday anyway. That's fucking fabulous. No, really.
And all I do is bitch anymore, but I'm so fucking tired of watching someone who's the best fucking part of me be crushed by someone who's toxic, when my thoughts are already laid on the table.
And it's so pathetic, but I'm so fucking tired. So fucking tired of being crushed every time I just try, all I fucking do is try, for one thing, to be happy, just once every now and then, one happy thing to make it through another fucking week, month, half year-
I just want to be happy.