(no subject)
good evening.
i hate myspace because when i spy on my friends, i miss my stupid little page.
with the dinosaur.
and the savage.
and all those trees.
but my pride won't let me back, just as it has been influencing my life in far too many ways for twenty-five years.
so what's up?
i've come to despise livejournal, too, but only because my writing sucks and i tend to pitch the same ideas and complaints from 2001 (when this thing was started-hoorah.).
what's new?
i dropped a speaker on my knee, cut my foot on a rock, and smashed my toe with a cookie sheet recently.
they all hurt, but i rather enjoyed the blood from the cut more than the bruising.
blood is interesting and gushy.
i get annoyed all the time by various things and people, and i'm working on it.
really.
i'm reading a book called "we will cast rainbows across the land" or something like that. it's about learning patience and compassion and tolerence.
but then i realized too that when you become more of those things, you just come off as uppity and sort of smarmy to other people. like showing understanding instead of being insulted. it makes people upset.
but that intrigues me, too.
making people upset by being nice.
i think, overall, i just want to feel like a "good person" but still secretly be an asshole.
or outwardly be an asshole, whatever.
i don't know- i'm half asleep and looking for my fluffy little cat as i write this.
so i don't really care, either.
i'm getting really good at giving less of a shit and rolling my eyes when someone looks away.
or giving suspicious looks. little things that no one sees you do but you find personally hilarious, especially when you don't even mean it. just making faces for no reason at all or maybe to stir up trouble if anyone was actually paying attention.
i hate myspace because when i spy on my friends, i miss my stupid little page.
with the dinosaur.
and the savage.
and all those trees.
but my pride won't let me back, just as it has been influencing my life in far too many ways for twenty-five years.
so what's up?
i've come to despise livejournal, too, but only because my writing sucks and i tend to pitch the same ideas and complaints from 2001 (when this thing was started-hoorah.).
what's new?
i dropped a speaker on my knee, cut my foot on a rock, and smashed my toe with a cookie sheet recently.
they all hurt, but i rather enjoyed the blood from the cut more than the bruising.
blood is interesting and gushy.
i get annoyed all the time by various things and people, and i'm working on it.
really.
i'm reading a book called "we will cast rainbows across the land" or something like that. it's about learning patience and compassion and tolerence.
but then i realized too that when you become more of those things, you just come off as uppity and sort of smarmy to other people. like showing understanding instead of being insulted. it makes people upset.
but that intrigues me, too.
making people upset by being nice.
i think, overall, i just want to feel like a "good person" but still secretly be an asshole.
or outwardly be an asshole, whatever.
i don't know- i'm half asleep and looking for my fluffy little cat as i write this.
so i don't really care, either.
i'm getting really good at giving less of a shit and rolling my eyes when someone looks away.
or giving suspicious looks. little things that no one sees you do but you find personally hilarious, especially when you don't even mean it. just making faces for no reason at all or maybe to stir up trouble if anyone was actually paying attention.