I Just Bought a Case of Peanut Butter Eggs
Let me tell you why:
My mother and I got into it last night over these checks when all I was doing was looking for someone to feel outraged with me. Instead she tells me Delinda told her it wouldn't be a problem and that the bank will take the checks. She missed the part where I told her my name was completely wrong on the check thinking I meant it was the hyphenated mess of Wood-Friepze. Apparently she thinks so little of me and ability to deal with little things that she thinks I would blow a head gasket over something I can white out. I got screamed a litany about her poor life for that one.
When it got sussed out and my meaning was understood, she quietly said, they will have to issue you new checks.During the time I tried to explain, she talked over me and screamed at me, but when I finally did explain, I didn't get an apology, no, she was waiting for her because I told her I was angry with her that this hadn't been taken care of way back when.
I now see that the name thing is my fault for trusting mom to do her due diligence. This is where the two of us are the same, if something is deemed my individual responsibility, I will take care of it without interference. However, where we differ is, I will see it completely through and not trust that the idiots who keep getting it wrong will eventually get it right. Especially when it is my daughter's name.
There is a disconnect in our relationship. I think that I should rate above other people to my mother. The truth is I never have and I never will.
If I want to contact my mother on a weekday I can only call between 5 and 7 pm and that is iffy because when she gets home from the job she hates but insists on going to day in and day out, she is tired, might lie down for a nap right away so she may sleep through this time and wake up sometime around 1 am. God forbid someone interrupt her nap. A person will catch all kinds of hell for it. Additionally, if she is not home during this time sleeping, she is either in the middle of some housework or TV program that cannot be interrupted or over knocking back a few with her friends.
On the weekends, she is equally as busy, so getting a hold of her is twice as hard. She sleeps most of the day and, at night, wants to "relax." If I manage to get a hold of her, the conversation has to revolve around how bad her boss is, how busy she is at work, what an ass my dad is, how harley needs to go out to pee or she needs to feed her cat or harley is sleepy, or anything to cut short any conversation I want to have with her. In short, she wants to call me to complain about Dad and work but does not want to hear about my day other than, it's fine. Oh, once in a while she listens for about ten minutes but, whether on my dime or hers, I get a half hour bitch session about the problems in her life.
I am sick of it.
And last night, she says I have upset her too much to get any sleep and it was fine for me since I don't know what it is like to get up and go to work in the morning. Translation: My life is so hard, Gina, and I think that you are useless and worthless. I cannot express how badly that hurts. I cried and cried and cried last night and this morning.
This morning, it came to me, something about my mom. She was teased and pick on her whole life. I think she got pregnant on purpose to force my dad into marrying her so that she could land the football star and prove to everyone she wasn't a loser. All my life she talked about how he pursued her but something didn't ring true especially since when he was seeing her, he was seeing other girls as well. I think she was easy and put out with the intention of nabbing him. Like he was some great prize. Because she is so weird about things. If he and I argue, Dad is always right even when she knows he is lying. She is constantly babying him and coddling him and spending her money on him. On top of it, she couldn't wait to get me out of the house. She includes him in every activity, even when he will be miserable and will make others miserable because he is miserable. I finally get it. It wasn't me she wanted. I was an ends to a means. Only the means didn't turn out the way she wanted.
And I have a wonderful marriage she is jealous of because she didn't hold out for Mr. Right. In a parallel universe, everything has worked out better and I am sure I have superpowers.
My mother and I got into it last night over these checks when all I was doing was looking for someone to feel outraged with me. Instead she tells me Delinda told her it wouldn't be a problem and that the bank will take the checks. She missed the part where I told her my name was completely wrong on the check thinking I meant it was the hyphenated mess of Wood-Friepze. Apparently she thinks so little of me and ability to deal with little things that she thinks I would blow a head gasket over something I can white out. I got screamed a litany about her poor life for that one.
When it got sussed out and my meaning was understood, she quietly said, they will have to issue you new checks.During the time I tried to explain, she talked over me and screamed at me, but when I finally did explain, I didn't get an apology, no, she was waiting for her because I told her I was angry with her that this hadn't been taken care of way back when.
I now see that the name thing is my fault for trusting mom to do her due diligence. This is where the two of us are the same, if something is deemed my individual responsibility, I will take care of it without interference. However, where we differ is, I will see it completely through and not trust that the idiots who keep getting it wrong will eventually get it right. Especially when it is my daughter's name.
There is a disconnect in our relationship. I think that I should rate above other people to my mother. The truth is I never have and I never will.
If I want to contact my mother on a weekday I can only call between 5 and 7 pm and that is iffy because when she gets home from the job she hates but insists on going to day in and day out, she is tired, might lie down for a nap right away so she may sleep through this time and wake up sometime around 1 am. God forbid someone interrupt her nap. A person will catch all kinds of hell for it. Additionally, if she is not home during this time sleeping, she is either in the middle of some housework or TV program that cannot be interrupted or over knocking back a few with her friends.
On the weekends, she is equally as busy, so getting a hold of her is twice as hard. She sleeps most of the day and, at night, wants to "relax." If I manage to get a hold of her, the conversation has to revolve around how bad her boss is, how busy she is at work, what an ass my dad is, how harley needs to go out to pee or she needs to feed her cat or harley is sleepy, or anything to cut short any conversation I want to have with her. In short, she wants to call me to complain about Dad and work but does not want to hear about my day other than, it's fine. Oh, once in a while she listens for about ten minutes but, whether on my dime or hers, I get a half hour bitch session about the problems in her life.
I am sick of it.
And last night, she says I have upset her too much to get any sleep and it was fine for me since I don't know what it is like to get up and go to work in the morning. Translation: My life is so hard, Gina, and I think that you are useless and worthless. I cannot express how badly that hurts. I cried and cried and cried last night and this morning.
This morning, it came to me, something about my mom. She was teased and pick on her whole life. I think she got pregnant on purpose to force my dad into marrying her so that she could land the football star and prove to everyone she wasn't a loser. All my life she talked about how he pursued her but something didn't ring true especially since when he was seeing her, he was seeing other girls as well. I think she was easy and put out with the intention of nabbing him. Like he was some great prize. Because she is so weird about things. If he and I argue, Dad is always right even when she knows he is lying. She is constantly babying him and coddling him and spending her money on him. On top of it, she couldn't wait to get me out of the house. She includes him in every activity, even when he will be miserable and will make others miserable because he is miserable. I finally get it. It wasn't me she wanted. I was an ends to a means. Only the means didn't turn out the way she wanted.
And I have a wonderful marriage she is jealous of because she didn't hold out for Mr. Right. In a parallel universe, everything has worked out better and I am sure I have superpowers.