this might be the end: fanfic part 19
title: this might be the end
rating: teen
spoilers: nope
disclaimer: don't own
“Hypothyroidism. It’s a thyroid hormone deficiency that Allison has had for a while which is the reason she was unable to get pregnant in the past.”
House listened to the doctor, beating around in his mind for some explanation as to how he and Cameron, both, missed the symptoms. Sure they’re similar to pregnancy, but…what the hell?
They’re both doctors!
As the doctor spoke, House constantly gave sarcastic retorts to every comment as some defense against his lapse of ignorance, but they were only thoughts.
It seemed that he was unable to vocalize his anger because, really, there were two main concerns consuming his mind.
The only things worth being mentioned right then was whether Cameron and the baby were fine. He didn’t need to hear the details about the problem; he already knew.
Possible birth defects including IQ, development…
House, at least, allowed the doctor to finish the unnecessary spiel, but wandered off to the past, trying to grasp the moments where it was clear there was a problem. Even that day, she said she was cold, and her body was sore.
Well, obviously, she’s pregnant, but if it was any other pregnant woman he could have spotted the difference. Why not his own wife? When it concerned their child?
When the explanation was through, House asked the question that had been hammering his brain since the second he saw Cameron on the floor,
“And the baby?”
“Right now everything seems to be fine, but we’re going to run some tests to confirm that the fall didn’t cause any damage, but we-”
“Have you discovered the cause for Allison to actually collapse,” he asked casually, trying to succeed in the illusion of a together, in control, confident father.
But that was the outside. Anyone can fake the look of composure. It was everything jumbling about at intensely fast rates on the inside, the feeling of repositioning organs twisting, stretching, and tightening.
It was painful.
It was draining.
It was blocking all oxygen.
And it pissed him off.
“Not yet. A logical cause-”
“I don’t want logical. I want to know what happened,” House demanded.
“I’m sorry, but right now we can only speculate,” pause, “It could have been the dizziness that was getting to her, possibly stress.”
The doctor paused briefly once again, allowing all his words to sink in with the seemingly detached man before him.
House’s head lowered his focus on the floor before his eyes shut slowly at the word ‘stress.’ Stress he was certain to be the reason for.
The doctor continued,
“A positive to all of this is if the incident hadn’t occurred, then detection would have come about much later. The cause of her inability to become pregnant wasn’t discovered before-”
“Don’t worry. I’ll be contacting that doctor verysoon,” House said dangerously.
“Of course. We’re going to do some blood tests to check her TSH levels…”
House nodded as the doctor continued to speak. It was all he could do. There really wasn’t more he wanted or needed to hear.
“Can I go see her now?”
Funny, since that was a pointless question because regardless of the answer he was going into her room anyway. If Wilson was there, he’d probably bring that up. ‘Where is Wilson,’ House thought to himself as he limped down the hall to Cameron’s room.
If there was ever a true moment where he needed him it was right then. Although he would never admit it, never show it, House believed that he and Cameron were the only two people who could relax him, reassure him…‘make things better.’
House opened the door to Cameron’s room, dragging a chair from the corner to the side of her bed, and watched with his chin grazing along the handle of his cane.
She was asleep, and he was silently convincing himself, doing his best to not allow all the blame to fall on him. It was something that neither of them needed.
Chest moving up and down with her breaths, House placed a hand on the top of her stomach, the pad of his thumb running a circular pattern around her bellybutton. With a deep breath, Cameron opened her eyes.
“Hey,” he said in a rough whisper.
“Hi,” pause, “Is everything...okay?”
His hand slid down to her side as he pulled away, leaning back in his chair,
“They’re going to do a few tests to make sure.” The look on her face made him continue,
“Right now they think that everything’s fine.”
“What do you think,” she asked.
Hesitating, “I don’t know. We’ll see what happens,” he said with a shrug.
Rolling her eyes, Cameron turned her head so she was staring up at the ceiling. Why did he always have to do that? Make the big things seem like not such a big deal?
At times that sort of quality would be welcoming, but not this time and she couldn't hold in the annoyance that she felt towards his seemingly careless response,
“We’ll see what happens.” It was like a statement of disbelief to herself before she propped up onto her elbows,
“That’s all you have to say about it? We’ll see what happens? Yeah great plan, House. I’m so glad you care that much.”
“Look, what do you want me to say huh?”
“Nothing. Why would I possibly want you to say anything,” she asked heatedly.
“Hell if I know. I’m the last person anyone should come to for something like this, but you’re obviously expecting something. So tell me, what is you want to hear?”
“A little honesty would help instead of the constant guessing game we’ve been playing since the first day we met.”
The volume of her voice elevated as the fury surged through her body with every word, every bitter word of truth.
“No. What you want to hear is that I’m scared and need you to stay with me so we can talk about our feelings,” he said with disdain, his face contorting into a mocking expression of her, what he thought, absurdity.
Shaking her head, she adjusted so that she was lying slightly on her side, back facing him.
With a sigh, House stood from the chair, taking one step forward before second guessing his actions.
Should he stay?
Would it be better to let things settle down?
No.
Cameron's body tilted backward from the dip of the bed as House took a seat next to her.
"Scoot over."
"Just leave me alone for a while, Greg," she whispered. House smiled to himself as he scanned the length of the bed, his hand levitating above her side before brining it back.
"Don't be cranky. Now move," he nudged her a bit until she finally, grudgingly moved forward.
"You are such a stubborn ass," she stated.
He slid one arm underneath her pillow while the other wrapped around her waist, his chin touching the top of her head.
Minutes passed, the buzzing from the light on the ceiling, the soles of shoes tapping against the floor as people walked by, and the scrunchy squeak from their bodies repositioning every so often as company until,
"I hope things are okay," she said while gripping his fingers, squeezing for reassurance.
"It will be," he said into her ear then placed a kiss on her cheek.
::For real this time, it'll be at least a month before I can get the next one::
rating: teen
spoilers: nope
disclaimer: don't own
“Hypothyroidism. It’s a thyroid hormone deficiency that Allison has had for a while which is the reason she was unable to get pregnant in the past.”
House listened to the doctor, beating around in his mind for some explanation as to how he and Cameron, both, missed the symptoms. Sure they’re similar to pregnancy, but…what the hell?
They’re both doctors!
As the doctor spoke, House constantly gave sarcastic retorts to every comment as some defense against his lapse of ignorance, but they were only thoughts.
It seemed that he was unable to vocalize his anger because, really, there were two main concerns consuming his mind.
The only things worth being mentioned right then was whether Cameron and the baby were fine. He didn’t need to hear the details about the problem; he already knew.
Possible birth defects including IQ, development…
House, at least, allowed the doctor to finish the unnecessary spiel, but wandered off to the past, trying to grasp the moments where it was clear there was a problem. Even that day, she said she was cold, and her body was sore.
Well, obviously, she’s pregnant, but if it was any other pregnant woman he could have spotted the difference. Why not his own wife? When it concerned their child?
When the explanation was through, House asked the question that had been hammering his brain since the second he saw Cameron on the floor,
“And the baby?”
“Right now everything seems to be fine, but we’re going to run some tests to confirm that the fall didn’t cause any damage, but we-”
“Have you discovered the cause for Allison to actually collapse,” he asked casually, trying to succeed in the illusion of a together, in control, confident father.
But that was the outside. Anyone can fake the look of composure. It was everything jumbling about at intensely fast rates on the inside, the feeling of repositioning organs twisting, stretching, and tightening.
It was painful.
It was draining.
It was blocking all oxygen.
And it pissed him off.
“Not yet. A logical cause-”
“I don’t want logical. I want to know what happened,” House demanded.
“I’m sorry, but right now we can only speculate,” pause, “It could have been the dizziness that was getting to her, possibly stress.”
The doctor paused briefly once again, allowing all his words to sink in with the seemingly detached man before him.
House’s head lowered his focus on the floor before his eyes shut slowly at the word ‘stress.’ Stress he was certain to be the reason for.
The doctor continued,
“A positive to all of this is if the incident hadn’t occurred, then detection would have come about much later. The cause of her inability to become pregnant wasn’t discovered before-”
“Don’t worry. I’ll be contacting that doctor verysoon,” House said dangerously.
“Of course. We’re going to do some blood tests to check her TSH levels…”
House nodded as the doctor continued to speak. It was all he could do. There really wasn’t more he wanted or needed to hear.
“Can I go see her now?”
Funny, since that was a pointless question because regardless of the answer he was going into her room anyway. If Wilson was there, he’d probably bring that up. ‘Where is Wilson,’ House thought to himself as he limped down the hall to Cameron’s room.
If there was ever a true moment where he needed him it was right then. Although he would never admit it, never show it, House believed that he and Cameron were the only two people who could relax him, reassure him…‘make things better.’
House opened the door to Cameron’s room, dragging a chair from the corner to the side of her bed, and watched with his chin grazing along the handle of his cane.
She was asleep, and he was silently convincing himself, doing his best to not allow all the blame to fall on him. It was something that neither of them needed.
Chest moving up and down with her breaths, House placed a hand on the top of her stomach, the pad of his thumb running a circular pattern around her bellybutton. With a deep breath, Cameron opened her eyes.
“Hey,” he said in a rough whisper.
“Hi,” pause, “Is everything...okay?”
His hand slid down to her side as he pulled away, leaning back in his chair,
“They’re going to do a few tests to make sure.” The look on her face made him continue,
“Right now they think that everything’s fine.”
“What do you think,” she asked.
Hesitating, “I don’t know. We’ll see what happens,” he said with a shrug.
Rolling her eyes, Cameron turned her head so she was staring up at the ceiling. Why did he always have to do that? Make the big things seem like not such a big deal?
At times that sort of quality would be welcoming, but not this time and she couldn't hold in the annoyance that she felt towards his seemingly careless response,
“We’ll see what happens.” It was like a statement of disbelief to herself before she propped up onto her elbows,
“That’s all you have to say about it? We’ll see what happens? Yeah great plan, House. I’m so glad you care that much.”
“Look, what do you want me to say huh?”
“Nothing. Why would I possibly want you to say anything,” she asked heatedly.
“Hell if I know. I’m the last person anyone should come to for something like this, but you’re obviously expecting something. So tell me, what is you want to hear?”
“A little honesty would help instead of the constant guessing game we’ve been playing since the first day we met.”
The volume of her voice elevated as the fury surged through her body with every word, every bitter word of truth.
“No. What you want to hear is that I’m scared and need you to stay with me so we can talk about our feelings,” he said with disdain, his face contorting into a mocking expression of her, what he thought, absurdity.
Shaking her head, she adjusted so that she was lying slightly on her side, back facing him.
With a sigh, House stood from the chair, taking one step forward before second guessing his actions.
Should he stay?
Would it be better to let things settle down?
No.
Cameron's body tilted backward from the dip of the bed as House took a seat next to her.
"Scoot over."
"Just leave me alone for a while, Greg," she whispered. House smiled to himself as he scanned the length of the bed, his hand levitating above her side before brining it back.
"Don't be cranky. Now move," he nudged her a bit until she finally, grudgingly moved forward.
"You are such a stubborn ass," she stated.
He slid one arm underneath her pillow while the other wrapped around her waist, his chin touching the top of her head.
Minutes passed, the buzzing from the light on the ceiling, the soles of shoes tapping against the floor as people walked by, and the scrunchy squeak from their bodies repositioning every so often as company until,
"I hope things are okay," she said while gripping his fingers, squeezing for reassurance.
"It will be," he said into her ear then placed a kiss on her cheek.
::For real this time, it'll be at least a month before I can get the next one::