Have you ever loved somebody so much it makes you cry?

[niiinnnaaaa]

Why do I always end up feeling second best?

I wish I could just be satisfied with the way things are for once. But then, everything would be perfect and boring wouldn't it? Oh, I don't know anymore. I don't know what I want, what I'm feeling. I don't know why every sentence in this entry starts with "I" or "I'm." Does that make me self-centered? I'

Comments

[katiehammaker]

nina

[niiinnnaaaa]

Katie.

Thank you for the comment, and the encouragement. However, I do disagree with a couple of things. [The rest is truly fantastic and I love you and thank you.] The grades- I work my ass off for them, especially this year...It's so hard. My mother does not buy me anything I want, in fact, all of my new clothes this year I bought for myself with my own money earned babysitting. She bought me, I think, three pairs of jeans. I don't think my life is shit, but just like you, I'm not happy with every single aspect of it. And I also know there's no such thing as the "perfect life." I'm not stupid, and just because I wish a few things were better doesn't mean I'm not thankful for the things I already have [You and the rest of my friends for example.<3]. I don't know why we worry, but that's also part of human nature...So we might as well not try to candycoat it and be like "I'm totally happy all the time, nothing is ever wrong." I agree though, there are much, much more than "I wants" in life, and I know that. But, things change. And

[katiehammaker]

well i know someone who candycoats it all the time. and she is literally the happiest person i know. but whatever. yea soo anyways.

i know everyone wants change sometimes. but what if that is the way GOD wants you.

katie

[niiinnnaaaa]

If she candycoats it, that means she's not happy all the time. But, if we're talking about Caroline Ballowe, I don't think she candycoats it. She's just plain happy with whatever comes her way. And that's a true gift, not everyone is that blessed.

God knows that as you grow and mature, you're going to go through some changes. He understands that as long as you're not like breaking the law [which He also forgives because he knows that's part of growing up and making mistakes and learning from them], then it's necessary for a person to change to become the person they're going to be for the rest of their lives.

I love you.<3

[katiehammaker]

we are talking caroline ballowe. and you wouldnt know because you arent that close with her. she acts like she is happy with is (candy coating it) duh!!!!!

[niiinnnaaaa]

Well, let's get snippy about it?