So, because I was full of rage against God and didn't want to work through those feelings, because I just wanted to hold on to my anger at God for what I saw as his cruelty and for what I saw as His apathy, I renounced all belief in any god of any sort and went out searching for something else that made sense to me because, frankly, pure atheism didn't. Along came Buddhism and a chance encounter with a Buddhist monk on a bus, who sat next to me one day when no one else would because I was crying my eyeballs out, alternately (still) mourning my brother and spewing venom at God; I was probably frightening people. But he talked to me, comforted me, accepted me, and recommended a certain book for me to read, which I then checked out of the library and that started me on that path.
So, to make a long story short, this short, chance encounter with one Buddhist made me seek out more information about Buddhism, which as I said I found to be very attractive not because of anything that was "revealed" to me but because I felt that it was "right," because it touched me, and because I became what I thought to be a better, nicer, and much more "spiritual" person because of my practice. And it was even more attractive to me because I could be both an atheist and a Buddhist at the same time, and I definitely wasn't giving up my atheism at the time.
So, this is what I meant by other paths being, in my experience, easier in the sense that they "felt right" and that required much less of me, personally. (The word "easier" is not the same as "better"; nowhere did I claim that Christianity was "better" than any other path that one might choose. I said it was harder, which is a much different thing. So would you please stop putting words into my mouth, too?)
Now, I'm not saying that what you're feeling isn't genuine or isn't a good thing. Because, quite frankly, I did become a "better person", certainly a much less angry person, because of Buddhism. So in that sense, it was good. God made use of it. But for me, it was not the end. I kept feeling...restless. Like something wasn't quite right, even though I was studying away and doing all the things I was supposed to do and was, in general, happy. What happened after that is an even longer story that I'm not sure is even worth bothering to tell. I'll just say that, ultimately, for me my Buddhist practice was an important stepping stone on the path of my life, one that helped to lead me toward where I am supposed to be. Now, again, I'm not saying that this is necessarily the case for you. I'm saying this is how it was for me, and it seems to me that there are some similarities in our paths. That doesn't mean, though, that what was right for me is right for you. Only you know that, and, ultimately only God knows that.
Because, like I said, I cannot judge you or really know you. I can only point out some things for you to think about and to accept or reject as you see fit. You can rant and rave at me and call me all the names you like; it matters not what you think of me. What is of concern, though, is what is in your heart. Right now, by the fruit that you're bearing which is a reflection of that heart, it seems that there's still a lot of rage and resentment toward God and Christians in there. You might want to think about working on that, if you're truly interested in finding the inner peace that, if I'm not mistaken, is a cornerstone of the various pagan and neopagan paths. Ultimately, if you're so happy in your practice, then why do you care one whit about what this one Christian says or thinks? Why keep ranting about Christians? Why not just work on yourself?
So, this is what I meant by other paths being, in my experience, easier in the sense that they "felt right" and that required much less of me, personally.
Easier and "requiring less" in your experience. Doesn't necessarily mean that others' experiences are the same.
Now, I'm not saying that what you're feeling isn't genuine or isn't a good thing. Because, quite frankly, I did become a "better person", certainly a much less angry person, because of Buddhism. So in that sense, it was good. God made use of it.
That doesn't mean, though, that what was right for me is right for you. Only you know that, and, ultimately only God knows that.
Exactly. Exactly.
Basically, your experience was that Buddhism was right for you at that time, but at some point, you realised you needed more, you needed a personal God, you needed Christ. Yes?
Now, I think the question you're struggling with, in this context, is, "If I've found that Christianity is what's right for me after going through everything else, how could someone find what's right for him somewhere else after going through Christianity?" If I'm not mistaken, you're wondering if, as a Christian, he didn't apply the process (of Christianity) correctly or overlooked God's hints or something went wrong, because if he did everything right, he should have found Truth in Christianity just like you found Truth in Christianity. Right/wrong/kumquat?
The thought I'm throwing out to you (and I could be just as wrong) is that maybe it's not an issue of being "wrong", maybe his path is just the way it is, and maybe the way he understands the Divine is how He/She/It wants to be understood by him, at this point in time. Only God knows, as you said.
So, to make a long story short, this short, chance encounter with one Buddhist made me seek out more information about Buddhism, which as I said I found to be very attractive not because of anything that was "revealed" to me but because I felt that it was "right," because it touched me, and because I became what I thought to be a better, nicer, and much more "spiritual" person because of my practice. And it was even more attractive to me because I could be both an atheist and a Buddhist at the same time, and I definitely wasn't giving up my atheism at the time.
So, this is what I meant by other paths being, in my experience, easier in the sense that they "felt right" and that required much less of me, personally. (The word "easier" is not the same as "better"; nowhere did I claim that Christianity was "better" than any other path that one might choose. I said it was harder, which is a much different thing. So would you please stop putting words into my mouth, too?)
Now, I'm not saying that what you're feeling isn't genuine or isn't a good thing. Because, quite frankly, I did become a "better person", certainly a much less angry person, because of Buddhism. So in that sense, it was good. God made use of it. But for me, it was not the end. I kept feeling...restless. Like something wasn't quite right, even though I was studying away and doing all the things I was supposed to do and was, in general, happy. What happened after that is an even longer story that I'm not sure is even worth bothering to tell. I'll just say that, ultimately, for me my Buddhist practice was an important stepping stone on the path of my life, one that helped to lead me toward where I am supposed to be. Now, again, I'm not saying that this is necessarily the case for you. I'm saying this is how it was for me, and it seems to me that there are some similarities in our paths. That doesn't mean, though, that what was right for me is right for you. Only you know that, and, ultimately only God knows that.
Because, like I said, I cannot judge you or really know you. I can only point out some things for you to think about and to accept or reject as you see fit. You can rant and rave at me and call me all the names you like; it matters not what you think of me. What is of concern, though, is what is in your heart. Right now, by the fruit that you're bearing which is a reflection of that heart, it seems that there's still a lot of rage and resentment toward God and Christians in there. You might want to think about working on that, if you're truly interested in finding the inner peace that, if I'm not mistaken, is a cornerstone of the various pagan and neopagan paths. Ultimately, if you're so happy in your practice, then why do you care one whit about what this one Christian says or thinks? Why keep ranting about Christians? Why not just work on yourself?
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Easier and "requiring less" in your experience. Doesn't necessarily mean that others' experiences are the same.
Now, I'm not saying that what you're feeling isn't genuine or isn't a good thing. Because, quite frankly, I did become a "better person", certainly a much less angry person, because of Buddhism. So in that sense, it was good. God made use of it.
That doesn't mean, though, that what was right for me is right for you. Only you know that, and, ultimately only God knows that.
Exactly. Exactly.
Basically, your experience was that Buddhism was right for you at that time, but at some point, you realised you needed more, you needed a personal God, you needed Christ. Yes?
Now, I think the question you're struggling with, in this context, is, "If I've found that Christianity is what's right for me after going through everything else, how could someone find what's right for him somewhere else after going through Christianity?" If I'm not mistaken, you're wondering if, as a Christian, he didn't apply the process (of Christianity) correctly or overlooked God's hints or something went wrong, because if he did everything right, he should have found Truth in Christianity just like you found Truth in Christianity. Right/wrong/kumquat?
The thought I'm throwing out to you (and I could be just as wrong) is that maybe it's not an issue of being "wrong", maybe his path is just the way it is, and maybe the way he understands the Divine is how He/She/It wants to be understood by him, at this point in time. Only God knows, as you said.
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