This sounds very familiar to me. I think our mothers may have a lot in common. I also learned the hard way growing up that my mother could not be trusted with my inner thoughts and aspirations. She would only spit on all of that and tell me what I *should* do.
In her efforts to control me once I reached adulthood, she did something that essentially changed the course of my education. The only way I could go to university was to take out scads of student loans, and as long as I was living at home and under a certain age my student loan applications required Mom's signature and income information. My application was all filled out and ready to go for my second year when Mom found out that I had started visiting my estranged father on the sly. I got home that day to find that she had taken scissors to my application, cutting out her signature and every reference to her information.
The Maternal Unit knew I wanted to attend a particular private university in Waco (we live in Houston), because they had an undergraduate program I wanted to pursue, as well as a reputation for having an excellent law school, which I also wanted to attend after finishing my undergrad degree
( ... )
Oh yeah. And the reason I no longer speak to the Paternal Unit either is that he recently admitted to me that, since he's been married to her for 40 years, he's always going to take her side over mine, no matter what. I always knew he felt that way, but having him actually say the words out loud was a real kick in the gut, yanno?
I'm so glad my mom was too drunk and too lazy to try this sort of thing.
She wanted to forbid me college altogether, but she had already allowed all the other kids to go, and supported them, so I had her on that one.
And because of her drinking and such, she really didn't know the details of my applications process. Dad knew much more, because he did the financial aid apps for me (we had just gone bankrupt and were pro-rating the loss of the next 5 years: he needed to explain that, and the resulting large negative income).
If she had been sober and less lazy, though, I suspect I would never have gone to college.
In her efforts to control me once I reached adulthood, she did something that essentially changed the course of my education. The only way I could go to university was to take out scads of student loans, and as long as I was living at home and under a certain age my student loan applications required Mom's signature and income information. My application was all filled out and ready to go for my second year when Mom found out that I had started visiting my estranged father on the sly. I got home that day to find that she had taken scissors to my application, cutting out her signature and every reference to her information.
I didn't go to school that fall.
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She wanted to forbid me college altogether, but she had already allowed all the other kids to go, and supported them, so I had her on that one.
And because of her drinking and such, she really didn't know the details of my applications process. Dad knew much more, because he did the financial aid apps for me (we had just gone bankrupt and were pro-rating the loss of the next 5 years: he needed to explain that, and the resulting large negative income).
If she had been sober and less lazy, though, I suspect I would never have gone to college.
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