Fuck Surveys
I get tired of all the damn surveys on people's journals, "What's your favorite color? How old are you? Do you prefer vanilla or chocolate?". Who gives a fuck if you prefer vanilla or chocolate?! So I am devising a survey to more accurately calculate people's interests. Please post your survey answers in the commentary section
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2. You god damn lier, who fucked you in the asshole? my dog while I was sleeping.
3. Have you ever masturbated to the thought of a cast member from the Golden Girls? yes
4. Do you even know what the hell a Golden Girls is? I thought it was a name of a girl scout.
5. Why do you look at your poop before you flush it? to see if that condom has finally come out.
6. I know you looked at your poop the last time you flushed it you mother fucker. Don't fuck with me, what the hell is wrong with you? well I was dropped on my head a few to many times
7. Would you fuck a person with an STD if they were the hottest person you have ever seen? Yes, Id fuck her till my dick rotted off I’m not gonna be able to use it when I’m 40 anyways so hell why not.
8. Come on, don't bullshit me, you would fuck them even if they had 10 STD's. Just double bag it and take some aspirin or something. "Ouch, it burns! It's itchy, for the love of god kill me now!" No one gives a damn about your itchy genitals! Have you ever poured Windex on someone's penis to relieve the itching? no, it was my penis I poured it on.
9. Why did you picture a penis being doused in Windex you sick mother fucker? cause it gives me happy feelings.
10. Have you ever stalked someone and tried to kill them; but decided not to go through it with because they live in your home and help pay the rent? yes, but they do a lot more then pay the rent…
11. Have you ever offered a homeless man some food, and then kicked him in the balls when he tried to take it from you? yes, but I kicked him there like 5 or 6 times.
12. Then when that homeless bastard was on the ground crying because you kicked him in the balls, have you ever knocked him out and put him in the trunk of your car? no, I just bang him on the side of the street
13. What the hell is that smell? most likely the kamikaze.
14. You know what that fucking smell is, don't play dumb you filthy cock sucker. Have you no shame? I got thirsty, would you like some?
15. Why are you wasting your fucking life taking my survey? cause my life is not imporant and will never amount to anything.
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