On the unexpected corrolation between working out and pants sizes.
Dear arse,
Funny, I thought perhaps that if I worked out for 45 minutes a day, every day, for 1.5 months, you would shrink.
Not, uh, grow two inches.
The. Fuck.
Now I have two work skirts I can wear (up around my natural waist), instead of seven (down at my hips). Two pairs of work pants -- and those are tight -- instead of eight. One motherlovin' pair of jeans, instead of *sniffle* five.
And no, I will not stop eating normal things. I want this healthy-living thing to be sustainable, dammit.
Money for professional work clothing? Don't have it. Masters and home renos are underway. So... there we are. Maybe I can take you to Value Village this month. If you're very, very good.
Get smaller on your own, maybe? Back down to your usual size? Pretty please?
Your reluctant owner,
Sam
P.S. You look pretty fab, though. Perky and round and awesome. I look forward to seeing how you look in pants that fit.
Funny, I thought perhaps that if I worked out for 45 minutes a day, every day, for 1.5 months, you would shrink.
Not, uh, grow two inches.
The. Fuck.
Now I have two work skirts I can wear (up around my natural waist), instead of seven (down at my hips). Two pairs of work pants -- and those are tight -- instead of eight. One motherlovin' pair of jeans, instead of *sniffle* five.
And no, I will not stop eating normal things. I want this healthy-living thing to be sustainable, dammit.
Money for professional work clothing? Don't have it. Masters and home renos are underway. So... there we are. Maybe I can take you to Value Village this month. If you're very, very good.
Get smaller on your own, maybe? Back down to your usual size? Pretty please?
Your reluctant owner,
Sam
P.S. You look pretty fab, though. Perky and round and awesome. I look forward to seeing how you look in pants that fit.