(no subject)
i'm finally figuring out what i mean to you, and the odds on my side aren't looking good. it's exhausting trying to figure out my significance to you, when i know that if i walked away it would be met with your shrug of the shoulders and a thousand glances in the other direction. i can't be bitter towards you for that, atleast i'm trying not to be.
but i am.
you say you think of me often, why i don't believe you i'll never know, maybe because people will say anything to me to shut me up. all i know is, i'm very tired of constantly being reminded that my feelings are trivial. when the phone rings i hope it's you, when yours rings, you hope it's not me, and when it is me, you let it ring. it's my fault for wanting more from you than you're able to give. you've already given it to too many people at once, and i've come far too late. it bothers me so much that it keeps me from my bed, while you're safe, warm in another's. which doesn't bother me like it used to.
it bothers me more than i'm of no significance to you.
i'm losing my faith that there are good men out there.
it felt so good to walk away from you, slamming the door in your face on my way out. and i refuse to find myself walking back to you, like i've always done. i'm a weak woman, but a good woman. and you, my dear, do not deserve me.
but i am.
you say you think of me often, why i don't believe you i'll never know, maybe because people will say anything to me to shut me up. all i know is, i'm very tired of constantly being reminded that my feelings are trivial. when the phone rings i hope it's you, when yours rings, you hope it's not me, and when it is me, you let it ring. it's my fault for wanting more from you than you're able to give. you've already given it to too many people at once, and i've come far too late. it bothers me so much that it keeps me from my bed, while you're safe, warm in another's. which doesn't bother me like it used to.
it bothers me more than i'm of no significance to you.
i'm losing my faith that there are good men out there.
it felt so good to walk away from you, slamming the door in your face on my way out. and i refuse to find myself walking back to you, like i've always done. i'm a weak woman, but a good woman. and you, my dear, do not deserve me.