insomnia contentment
i started shelving at the bookstore last week. i'm really enjoying it. the phone doesn't ring, there are no stupid questions, and best of all, no one stops me when i'm in the middle of something. i'm just left alone to do my thing, and it's fabulous. even the graveyard shift hasn't thrown me, but i wasn't worried about that. it's taken a week, but my body clock's switched to match my new schedule...i tried to sleep around 2am on sunday morning, and didn't manage to get a wink until the sun came up.
i'm still doing the two days at the theater, but i don't think i'm gonna continue that past mid august. it's just too hard to get up after a graveyard and work 14 hours straight.
i've got my interview panel on wednesday. my friend guza has told me since i started this process back in JANUARY that i've got the job. it's just taken for freaking ever, and my family's luck sucks, as you well know. i'm trying to be upbeat and not worry, and i'm doing an ok job of it, but that nagging in the back of my head won't stop no matter what i do. X-(
i've got to go to the doctor soon. i've been putting it off for a few weeks, which is stupid. i need to switch my anti-depressant i think. i've been on zoloft for twelve years, and lately it hasn't been helping me at all...little things that shouldn't bother me all that much are driving me crazy, i'm not nice to be around, and stuff i thought i was over (or should have gotten over) keep biting me in the ass. case in point, my vacation meltdown, all over one guy not calling me back. one stupid little thing, and i'm messed up for two weeks all weepy and angstful. how stupid is that? i'm just really unhappy a lot of the time, and that makes me not like me or anyone else, and that's no way to live.
ohhh, i love our computer. there's a scanner so i can finaly show off my beautiful yet terribly stupid kitty, and a cd burner so i can make my own cds, i can watch streaming video, and talk to people again...its soo cool *squee*
ah well, gotta pack my lunch and go. i don't live too far away from the store, but from january to now i've been late a few too many times and it's gotten me in to trouble. i'm not hanging around there forever, just until the county job finally comes into being, but loosing it because of being late is just pathetic, which i refuse to be...that at least i've got a handle on ;P
i'm still doing the two days at the theater, but i don't think i'm gonna continue that past mid august. it's just too hard to get up after a graveyard and work 14 hours straight.
i've got my interview panel on wednesday. my friend guza has told me since i started this process back in JANUARY that i've got the job. it's just taken for freaking ever, and my family's luck sucks, as you well know. i'm trying to be upbeat and not worry, and i'm doing an ok job of it, but that nagging in the back of my head won't stop no matter what i do. X-(
i've got to go to the doctor soon. i've been putting it off for a few weeks, which is stupid. i need to switch my anti-depressant i think. i've been on zoloft for twelve years, and lately it hasn't been helping me at all...little things that shouldn't bother me all that much are driving me crazy, i'm not nice to be around, and stuff i thought i was over (or should have gotten over) keep biting me in the ass. case in point, my vacation meltdown, all over one guy not calling me back. one stupid little thing, and i'm messed up for two weeks all weepy and angstful. how stupid is that? i'm just really unhappy a lot of the time, and that makes me not like me or anyone else, and that's no way to live.
ohhh, i love our computer. there's a scanner so i can finaly show off my beautiful yet terribly stupid kitty, and a cd burner so i can make my own cds, i can watch streaming video, and talk to people again...its soo cool *squee*
ah well, gotta pack my lunch and go. i don't live too far away from the store, but from january to now i've been late a few too many times and it's gotten me in to trouble. i'm not hanging around there forever, just until the county job finally comes into being, but loosing it because of being late is just pathetic, which i refuse to be...that at least i've got a handle on ;P