The Internet as prayer circle...
I've invoked it multiple times, and joined in on it even more - but that thought struck me this morning. How we've come to use technology in pursuit of the most primal spiritual urge... to invoke the Powers That Be towards a favorable outcome
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Thank you everyone for your hope and help.
As the NJ State Police have indicated to Chris's wife that "it may be a protracted period of time before Chris's body is recovered", the word has gone out around BMS that she and their children have decided to hold an open memorial service in NJ this Sunday. I'll be going, and looks like there will be at least one other work friend to go with.
But I am conflicted. I am warm and comfy in my state of denial, and part of me looks at a memorial service as surrendering to the inevitable. And it will be very difficult to remain professional in a room full of people all focused on a shared sorrow. BUT - the key word in that sentence is SHARED, not SORROW. And a memorial service is exactly that - memories. I guess... I'm not sure what I'm trying to say. I take "paying respects" seriously. I certainly don't want to add stress to his family in a terrible time, and be one more person they have to endure in a receiving line... but sometimes palpable proof of how much your loved one mattered to other people helps. It helped me when my Dad passed, that people came to share a story, or a handshake, or a hug, or music. It gave me a wider sense of my Dad as a person, and helped me shift some focus from my personal kernel of grief to gratitude and a little awe. And if that means getting in the car and driving 7 hours from Buffalo to NJ, to shake hands, and smile, and hide in the bathroom to cry, I can do that.
On a side note... unresolved issues much? Damn, I miss my Dad.
But I digress. :) And I'm at work. And I chastise other people for doing excessive web stuff at work, 'cause that's part of my job. So, before I dive any deeper into the hypocritical pool, gotta go.
But I'll be back.
Thanks for listening.
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