The Beast
I defer to the questions asked.
Three days in a row this creature has escaped from the yard, only to show up again on the front porch. Damn she won't go away. Its not like I invited her to stay. Can't believe I found this beast, how long ago?
It must have been late summer and I was out for an evening run. Hell it was 10:30 pm I'm sure and when else was I'm going to squeeze in a 5-6 km midweek run. If you wonder why so late, its because I'm too busy to run during the day. And if I don't run I become miserable, (well known to my beta). I turned a bit grumpy if not nasty on her when I was grounded due to a "slight injury".
I was on a poorly lit, quiet residential street, when fuck, this flash of brown streaked out from between two cars (I always run on the road) then darted back to the sidewalk. What the hell was that? Tell me I'm not hallucinatng. The creature kept pace with me, parallel in this apparent psychotic episode.
You really want to know what it looks like? Maybe a bad altered state of consciouness would help. Think minature deer, kind of like a fawn mixed with some non-descript terrier, maybe a bit of a Chihuahua given its bizarre head. But its as fast as a screaming bat out of hell and it seems to be able to run forever.
Hell, "go home" I shoo-ed at the beast. Jesus the beast stood its ground. "Go away" I said motioning with my hands. She ran a car length away then turned and proceeded to follow me. I had to stop (and I don't like doing that). "GO HOME!" I tried to stare down the trembling bit of muscle before me, not as high as my knee. But she only danced around me with this toothy little grin on her dried apple like head. "Go Home." Errrrr.
What to do? I did what every other insane night runner does, I shouted into the dark stillness. "Is this someone's dog?" But no one answered. (Like that's a big surprise). Given no one responded I tried to return to my run, but the beast remained my companion, now speeding infront of me and circling back. I turned onto a busy street and learned the beast was not "side walk trained.' She started running in around me. Are you mocking me now? God damnit, come here before you become road kill. I scooped up the beast, ended my run and walked the rest of the way home, carrying the annoying creature in my arms. She buried her head into my neck, then made contact with my face as only a dog can do. Yech. I hate being licked by a dog.
No one claimed her, despite my many attempts to find her owners. The beast wasn't even house trained. Another big yech. I guess it wasn't a leap to see why no one came forward to be reunited with this FRAP (frenetic, rapid, active, pup). Get off my bed, get off the couch, get away from the friggen table animal, that was my chocolate.
Dog = $ or rather $ out of my pocket.
Food + toys to destroy + shots + fixing + microchipping + allergy testing (yes allergies) + blood tests + heart worm pills + licensing = I am nuts and now broke.
So now "dog" shares my home. Yeah she has another name, but I'd hate to give myself away as someone who cares.
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