(no subject)
Why do I post here? Or anywhere? Or do anything, really. Life is a very narrow tunnel of good right now, but everything outside that ..sucks. Penny's good, but she's all I see. I haven't been able to see Katy much cause David takes my car to work, so I have to wait for Justin to come in town. I don't have anyone to hang out with, except for Max at night. I occasionally see David's friends, but they don't like me anyways, pretty much because of David's good intentions. Like today I was tired and just wanted to sleep, but he argued that I should be able to come hang out too, so they just think I'm a controlling bitch. So whenever I do go hang out I know that's all they're thinking, and it just doesn't seem there's a point in going out ever. But I feel crappy at home too. I cashed in an insurance thing I had solely for the purpose of staying home with the baby for a month or two and being able to afford rent and bills. David's already reserved that money for paying for Comicon and a place to stay, and he makes me feel bad for not working, like right this second. But like 2 seconds later he's talking about working two jobs so I'll be able to stay home with the baby. I dunno. I'm just so tired right now. Literally, and just of everything. I've turned kinda cynical lately. I feel less guilt, and more anger, at a lot of people. But who does that really matter to anyways? Hence the first question of why do I post here?