(no subject)
Moody moody moody moody moody moody moody.
My back hurts like fuck which isn't helping.
And things get resolved but they don't go away and I say dumb, honest things that I then apologise too much for because I'm too attached, and then I realise that when he said it was all cool, he was right and I had apologised too much and I have once again seeked too much approval, gone too far and expected too much. Bleuuuuuuuuuugh.
And it doesn't matter a bit that I was right in what I said, that it was perceptive because it doesn't change anything. I'm...I mean I don't even care I just wish there weren't hints that I did still care. I shouldn't let people make me feel like this, only they don't, I do it all. They should still know better though, though it's not like they disagree. They positively tell me they agree and yet I keep going.
Must. Learn. To. Take. Steps. Back.
And also must learn to take other steps forward. Maybe next time, probably not.
Don't reply, K-dog isn't responding so I had to vent somewhere.
x
My back hurts like fuck which isn't helping.
And things get resolved but they don't go away and I say dumb, honest things that I then apologise too much for because I'm too attached, and then I realise that when he said it was all cool, he was right and I had apologised too much and I have once again seeked too much approval, gone too far and expected too much. Bleuuuuuuuuuugh.
And it doesn't matter a bit that I was right in what I said, that it was perceptive because it doesn't change anything. I'm...I mean I don't even care I just wish there weren't hints that I did still care. I shouldn't let people make me feel like this, only they don't, I do it all. They should still know better though, though it's not like they disagree. They positively tell me they agree and yet I keep going.
Must. Learn. To. Take. Steps. Back.
And also must learn to take other steps forward. Maybe next time, probably not.
Don't reply, K-dog isn't responding so I had to vent somewhere.
x