im unloading, got your helmet on..here we go
People are amazing. I can not stand it, everything is just so particular and spicific. Uniqueness is unnoticable when people dont look enough at people. I dont spend all my time observing, yet when i do, i just can not fucking believe my eyes. We all are alone. We all close are eyes and are in our own brain nothing is touching us, we our in our universe. Ive mentioned this before...I took a nap today thats why im so fucking wierd and thinking.
The television is off, which makes thigs better. I can feel the air in my lungs, and my heart feels tight while it pumps oxygen to my blood. My head is spinning, i keep slipping over this spot on the floor thats slippery. Ive always wanted carpeted floors. Even in my kitchen, haha that would be interesting. I just feel like i have lived a hundred years.
Gosh, i realize sometimes, when im feeling my life is so cliche and alike a comming of age book or movie. I stop and i breath and i know without thinking it, that each second i get older and each second death seems more possible. Lets jump ahead to years after i have died, i will be under the ground or burnt to ashes and in the ocean. The zest and life that fills my body now will be gone, and this is enevitable. I always at moments where life feels endless, began to think that i am not going to be like the characters in books or movies. That i will die, and i will be gone. Some morning or night or afternoon the physical apperance and essence that follows me will in years, or maybe days.. disinagrate into a memory. And thats the just of it. Im not saying i am afraid of death for me or for anyone. I just think it is so vast and amazing. Frightening like the ocean is frightening. Like the universe, in which we only look up and see a segment of stars at night. we see only a small piece of a smaller piece, yet it seems so big to us, because we are so small. And really there is so much more out in the endless space, so much more none of the creatures in this solar system, galaxy whatever will ever see or breath or feel or hear. In only that way is death frightening, only in the way of the universe and the sky and the ocean and fire. Maybe theyre frightening because they can be controled or if they are, it is hard to do so.
All i can say, is that as there is skin on my face, there is without a doubt life of some form on other planets. If there turned out not to be, i would be very depressed.
I hope every thing sleeps well (or of some form) tonight
The television is off, which makes thigs better. I can feel the air in my lungs, and my heart feels tight while it pumps oxygen to my blood. My head is spinning, i keep slipping over this spot on the floor thats slippery. Ive always wanted carpeted floors. Even in my kitchen, haha that would be interesting. I just feel like i have lived a hundred years.
Gosh, i realize sometimes, when im feeling my life is so cliche and alike a comming of age book or movie. I stop and i breath and i know without thinking it, that each second i get older and each second death seems more possible. Lets jump ahead to years after i have died, i will be under the ground or burnt to ashes and in the ocean. The zest and life that fills my body now will be gone, and this is enevitable. I always at moments where life feels endless, began to think that i am not going to be like the characters in books or movies. That i will die, and i will be gone. Some morning or night or afternoon the physical apperance and essence that follows me will in years, or maybe days.. disinagrate into a memory. And thats the just of it. Im not saying i am afraid of death for me or for anyone. I just think it is so vast and amazing. Frightening like the ocean is frightening. Like the universe, in which we only look up and see a segment of stars at night. we see only a small piece of a smaller piece, yet it seems so big to us, because we are so small. And really there is so much more out in the endless space, so much more none of the creatures in this solar system, galaxy whatever will ever see or breath or feel or hear. In only that way is death frightening, only in the way of the universe and the sky and the ocean and fire. Maybe theyre frightening because they can be controled or if they are, it is hard to do so.
All i can say, is that as there is skin on my face, there is without a doubt life of some form on other planets. If there turned out not to be, i would be very depressed.
I hope every thing sleeps well (or of some form) tonight