"spread your cheeks and lift your sack"
oh my gosh my ass hurts. i decided that for my daily exercise i would do more than the average crunches and such. so, at about 4:30 i started off to leipsic on nicks bike. boy was that a workout and a half. it took me almost two hours to do the whole 20 miles, but it was fucking awesome when i got done. needless to say my ass hurt.
worst of all, i think i hurt little elvis. i was going back and forth between sitting on each side of my painfully sore crotch and kept hurting the vesicle that runs directly down the middle. well, not thinking much of it i went to take much needed crap. thats when the problem started.
i couldnt fucking piss. oh no. its not that i didnt have to piss, its more like my willy didnt want to! everytime i would almost start it would hurt intensely and it would slightly trickle out. needing some advice, i asked my mother what i should do about my ignorant tallywacker. then grandma chimed in and said to soak my balls in the tub so that the muscle relaxes.
not wanting to have to have physician ram a urinary aide (i.e. cathetor) up my peehole i heeded the advice given to me by my mater familias. it sort of worked, but the purpleheaded yogurt slinger just isnt working properly.
i hope this all clears up. i hate doctors. their hands are eerily soft and they smell like moth balls. not that i've ever seen a moths balls. can you imagine? how would you get those little legs open?
worst of all, i think i hurt little elvis. i was going back and forth between sitting on each side of my painfully sore crotch and kept hurting the vesicle that runs directly down the middle. well, not thinking much of it i went to take much needed crap. thats when the problem started.
i couldnt fucking piss. oh no. its not that i didnt have to piss, its more like my willy didnt want to! everytime i would almost start it would hurt intensely and it would slightly trickle out. needing some advice, i asked my mother what i should do about my ignorant tallywacker. then grandma chimed in and said to soak my balls in the tub so that the muscle relaxes.
not wanting to have to have physician ram a urinary aide (i.e. cathetor) up my peehole i heeded the advice given to me by my mater familias. it sort of worked, but the purpleheaded yogurt slinger just isnt working properly.
i hope this all clears up. i hate doctors. their hands are eerily soft and they smell like moth balls. not that i've ever seen a moths balls. can you imagine? how would you get those little legs open?