happy birthday to me
Today, I am five years old. It's my spiritual birthday.
My Salvation Story
Little did I know the plans of the Lord when I decided in the Spring of 1999 that I wanted to move to Tennessee to go to law school. I had lived all my life in Florida and for a number of good reasons, after college I wanted to move up North. So I visited a few schools and decided that I liked the campus at the University of Tennessee the best (it offered all I wanted as far as a change of seasons as well). I was planning on taking a year off to relax, save up money and become a resident for tuition purposes. I thought I had a nice and neat little plan for my life. But I did not know the Lord yet and when I did meet Him, I discovered He had a whole other life in store for me!
I only knew one person when I moved to Knoxville that Summer, a very friendly girl named Pam, who I met when I went to visit an apartment complex. Pam had also just graduated from college and we had a lot in common. She also told me that she would probably be able to help me get a job at the restaurant she also worked at. So, a week after settling in to my new place, I drove down to the Greek restaurant where Pam worked and they hired me on the spot! I started work the next day. I was shocked because I did not have any experience as a waitress! I remember being very nervous as I walked up to the front door on my first day of work. As I opened it and walked inside, this pretty girl looked up from setting one of the tables and smiled so big that I was confused for a moment. She said in the most excited voice that I've ever heard "Ooo! Are you new?!" I was a little taken aback by her friendliness and enthusiasm, but I was also intrigued by her and liked her from the start. Her name was Elizabeth and right away she took me under her wing and made me feel so welcome.
The longer I worked with Elizabeth, the more I admired her. There was just something about this girl! I didn’t know what it was. When someone would tell a story with a ironic ending about someone‘s "dumb luck," Elizabeth would sigh with compassion while other people would just laugh. And she was always happy. No one is always happy! One day I heard her talking to another co-worker about church and I thought, "Oh, she’s one of ‘those people‘--a Christian!" I did not think highly of Christians. I thought they were the biggest bunch of hypocrites who thought that they were so much better than everyone else. So, I started to look down my nose at Elizabeth. But I still thought she was a great person and wanted her to be my friend. And as I started to examine her life and compare it to mine, I saw that she really had something that I did not. I also saw that she wasn't a hypocrite.
One day while we were sitting around snacking on bread, Elizabeth turned to me suddenly and asked me if I was a Christian. My face flushed red and I couldn't look at her. My quick answer was, "Yes," but I don't know how I could have really believed that, seeing as I grew up practicing different forms of Buddhist and New Age religion. I wasn’t even sure if there was a God, let alone the whole subject of Jesus Christ! But I still said yes to her--and then I'm sure I said something equally stupid to show her how much I was not (something along the lines of "all paths lead to God," which I really had convinced myself of at the time). I remember arrogantly thinking that I might be able to persuade this "poor Christian" to the truth! Little did I understand how different each religion really is or how necessary the Lord's life and death were!
I don’t think that Elizabeth batted an eyelash. She also didn’t start to debate with me. She waited until I was done speaking and then invited me to her church. I stopped in my tracks. I thought to myself, "If this girl goes to a church, it has to be a good one!" I heard myself say that I would love to go. And I meant it. Besides, I thought, "My religion is open to all other religions. Better go and see what Christianity is all about before I judge it!"
I had to wait a few weeks to be able to get off of work on a Sunday (which is hard to do in the South when everyone else goes to Church!), but the timing of it all was another part of God‘s plan. God had arranged things so that I would hear the perfect sermon, which included everything that I needed to hear! What stuck me most though, was when the pastor made a comment that we should not be a people that reads the Word on Sunday and forgets it on Monday, but that we should live the Bible. This was just a side comment he made, but it was something I had thought of before. There was a time when my mother and I visited a church were people seemed to live like this--the nice girls I saw on Sunday weren’t nice to me at school on Monday. I was delighted to hear the pastor say this. And I could believe that the people in the congregation took it to heart! I started to think to myself, "Wait a minute--this Christianity thing actually WORKS? It’s not some dead theology that men made up? No one told me THAT!" I looked around me and I saw people who knew the Lord. I knew that I didn't know Him, but I wanted to find out more. So, I kept going to that church. In fact, I quit my job at the restaurant because I wanted to back so much.
Well, how did I actually get saved? I thought about this in the midst of a conference I went to in 2000. They asked everyone to stand up if you were a Christian because someone else in that room shared the gospel with you. Well, I stood up, first thinking about Elizabeth, but she never really shared the gospel with me. I almost sat down, but then I remembered my pastor was there, too. He was the one who shared the gospel with me, in every prayer, in every sermon, in every song we sang! The gospel was all over the place. And I heard it from him. But Elizabeth played a vital role as well. I found out from her later that she and a friend prayed that they would find a summer job where they would people non-Christians and befriend them. She specifically prayed that at least one girl would come to know Christ. I am so happy that the Lord delighted to answer this little prayer.
I was saved in such a quiet way that I was actually confused about it for at least 5 months. I kept praying the sinner's prayer until one day while studying regeneration, I felt the Holy Spirit remind me of an otherwise unmemorable day. The day I was saved was on a Sunday in September, about two weeks after my first visit to Elizabeth‘s church. I was cleaning the house because my boyfriend was coming to visit, but I was doing more wandering around then cleaning. In my mind I was having a great debate that I think all heaven was watching. I was thinking about my new friends and my new life, this new church and the commands of God...especially the verses about purity. I knew that I knew better, but I was trying hard to make excuses for my sin. There is nothing I hate more than a hypocrite, yet I was being one myself. So, this battle went on all afternoon until I finally sat down on the couch and basically said "FINE! I will do whatever You want me to do! You can have me, just leave me alone!" Ha! And ever since that day, life has been different. I understood my Bible, I found power to say no to ungodliness, I discovered true fellowship and I knew that I was different--it just took me a little while to figure it all out.
And about wanting to go to law school: When I got my results back from my LSAT test, I started to think long and hard about "what if" I didn't get into law school? I had not done as well as I expected. It had been my dream for 7 years or so...and here I was, faced with the reality of not being able to get in! I realized with shock that, contrary to what I had always been told, I could not do anything I wanted to do just because I tried hard enough--I had real limitations! Maybe I wasn’t cut out for the law.
A few weeks before, I was talking to my friend Michelle after church and she was trying to get to know me better so she asked me what most people used to ask me, "Why do you want to be a lawyer?" I started my whole big spiel about wanting to help people and liking the law, etc, and she interrupted me and said, "Yeah...but is that what you REALLY want to do?" I was so relieved to hear myself say "NO!!! I want to be a wife and a mommy and stay home and I don't want to be a lawyer!!!" To this day, Michelle thinks that she is the reason why I didn't go to law school...but she's wrong because it was the Lord who finally won me over. At the previously mentioned conference in 2000, I was really praying about what to do and seeking the Lord in prayer about every 20 minutes (probably not an exaggeration!) I remember that this was the first time that the Lord gave me a verse. He actually gave me two. This was such a memorable moment for me. Here are the verses (and in my Bible, these two verses are on opposite pages):
Psalm 27:13-14
I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living.
Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD.
Psalm 31:24
Be strong and take heart, all you who hope in the LORD.
This was my commission: "Wait on Me." If I would give up law school, I would have all my heart's true desires. And God has fulfilled all His promises to me! As I sit here today I am a wife, I am a mother, I do stay home with my daughter and everyday I feel so thankful for these blessings!
The Lord has been so good to me! He called me out of a deep darkness, showed me the beauty of His truth and made me His own. I love to tell my story and I hope found encouragement in it. May we all be as good a friend to the people we met as my friend Elizabeth was to me. You never know how you might change a life with nothing but your smile and your friendship. You don’t have to do all the work--just be the one who can lead the thirsty to water.
Rev. 07-2005
My Salvation Story
Little did I know the plans of the Lord when I decided in the Spring of 1999 that I wanted to move to Tennessee to go to law school. I had lived all my life in Florida and for a number of good reasons, after college I wanted to move up North. So I visited a few schools and decided that I liked the campus at the University of Tennessee the best (it offered all I wanted as far as a change of seasons as well). I was planning on taking a year off to relax, save up money and become a resident for tuition purposes. I thought I had a nice and neat little plan for my life. But I did not know the Lord yet and when I did meet Him, I discovered He had a whole other life in store for me!
I only knew one person when I moved to Knoxville that Summer, a very friendly girl named Pam, who I met when I went to visit an apartment complex. Pam had also just graduated from college and we had a lot in common. She also told me that she would probably be able to help me get a job at the restaurant she also worked at. So, a week after settling in to my new place, I drove down to the Greek restaurant where Pam worked and they hired me on the spot! I started work the next day. I was shocked because I did not have any experience as a waitress! I remember being very nervous as I walked up to the front door on my first day of work. As I opened it and walked inside, this pretty girl looked up from setting one of the tables and smiled so big that I was confused for a moment. She said in the most excited voice that I've ever heard "Ooo! Are you new?!" I was a little taken aback by her friendliness and enthusiasm, but I was also intrigued by her and liked her from the start. Her name was Elizabeth and right away she took me under her wing and made me feel so welcome.
The longer I worked with Elizabeth, the more I admired her. There was just something about this girl! I didn’t know what it was. When someone would tell a story with a ironic ending about someone‘s "dumb luck," Elizabeth would sigh with compassion while other people would just laugh. And she was always happy. No one is always happy! One day I heard her talking to another co-worker about church and I thought, "Oh, she’s one of ‘those people‘--a Christian!" I did not think highly of Christians. I thought they were the biggest bunch of hypocrites who thought that they were so much better than everyone else. So, I started to look down my nose at Elizabeth. But I still thought she was a great person and wanted her to be my friend. And as I started to examine her life and compare it to mine, I saw that she really had something that I did not. I also saw that she wasn't a hypocrite.
One day while we were sitting around snacking on bread, Elizabeth turned to me suddenly and asked me if I was a Christian. My face flushed red and I couldn't look at her. My quick answer was, "Yes," but I don't know how I could have really believed that, seeing as I grew up practicing different forms of Buddhist and New Age religion. I wasn’t even sure if there was a God, let alone the whole subject of Jesus Christ! But I still said yes to her--and then I'm sure I said something equally stupid to show her how much I was not (something along the lines of "all paths lead to God," which I really had convinced myself of at the time). I remember arrogantly thinking that I might be able to persuade this "poor Christian" to the truth! Little did I understand how different each religion really is or how necessary the Lord's life and death were!
I don’t think that Elizabeth batted an eyelash. She also didn’t start to debate with me. She waited until I was done speaking and then invited me to her church. I stopped in my tracks. I thought to myself, "If this girl goes to a church, it has to be a good one!" I heard myself say that I would love to go. And I meant it. Besides, I thought, "My religion is open to all other religions. Better go and see what Christianity is all about before I judge it!"
I had to wait a few weeks to be able to get off of work on a Sunday (which is hard to do in the South when everyone else goes to Church!), but the timing of it all was another part of God‘s plan. God had arranged things so that I would hear the perfect sermon, which included everything that I needed to hear! What stuck me most though, was when the pastor made a comment that we should not be a people that reads the Word on Sunday and forgets it on Monday, but that we should live the Bible. This was just a side comment he made, but it was something I had thought of before. There was a time when my mother and I visited a church were people seemed to live like this--the nice girls I saw on Sunday weren’t nice to me at school on Monday. I was delighted to hear the pastor say this. And I could believe that the people in the congregation took it to heart! I started to think to myself, "Wait a minute--this Christianity thing actually WORKS? It’s not some dead theology that men made up? No one told me THAT!" I looked around me and I saw people who knew the Lord. I knew that I didn't know Him, but I wanted to find out more. So, I kept going to that church. In fact, I quit my job at the restaurant because I wanted to back so much.
Well, how did I actually get saved? I thought about this in the midst of a conference I went to in 2000. They asked everyone to stand up if you were a Christian because someone else in that room shared the gospel with you. Well, I stood up, first thinking about Elizabeth, but she never really shared the gospel with me. I almost sat down, but then I remembered my pastor was there, too. He was the one who shared the gospel with me, in every prayer, in every sermon, in every song we sang! The gospel was all over the place. And I heard it from him. But Elizabeth played a vital role as well. I found out from her later that she and a friend prayed that they would find a summer job where they would people non-Christians and befriend them. She specifically prayed that at least one girl would come to know Christ. I am so happy that the Lord delighted to answer this little prayer.
I was saved in such a quiet way that I was actually confused about it for at least 5 months. I kept praying the sinner's prayer until one day while studying regeneration, I felt the Holy Spirit remind me of an otherwise unmemorable day. The day I was saved was on a Sunday in September, about two weeks after my first visit to Elizabeth‘s church. I was cleaning the house because my boyfriend was coming to visit, but I was doing more wandering around then cleaning. In my mind I was having a great debate that I think all heaven was watching. I was thinking about my new friends and my new life, this new church and the commands of God...especially the verses about purity. I knew that I knew better, but I was trying hard to make excuses for my sin. There is nothing I hate more than a hypocrite, yet I was being one myself. So, this battle went on all afternoon until I finally sat down on the couch and basically said "FINE! I will do whatever You want me to do! You can have me, just leave me alone!" Ha! And ever since that day, life has been different. I understood my Bible, I found power to say no to ungodliness, I discovered true fellowship and I knew that I was different--it just took me a little while to figure it all out.
And about wanting to go to law school: When I got my results back from my LSAT test, I started to think long and hard about "what if" I didn't get into law school? I had not done as well as I expected. It had been my dream for 7 years or so...and here I was, faced with the reality of not being able to get in! I realized with shock that, contrary to what I had always been told, I could not do anything I wanted to do just because I tried hard enough--I had real limitations! Maybe I wasn’t cut out for the law.
A few weeks before, I was talking to my friend Michelle after church and she was trying to get to know me better so she asked me what most people used to ask me, "Why do you want to be a lawyer?" I started my whole big spiel about wanting to help people and liking the law, etc, and she interrupted me and said, "Yeah...but is that what you REALLY want to do?" I was so relieved to hear myself say "NO!!! I want to be a wife and a mommy and stay home and I don't want to be a lawyer!!!" To this day, Michelle thinks that she is the reason why I didn't go to law school...but she's wrong because it was the Lord who finally won me over. At the previously mentioned conference in 2000, I was really praying about what to do and seeking the Lord in prayer about every 20 minutes (probably not an exaggeration!) I remember that this was the first time that the Lord gave me a verse. He actually gave me two. This was such a memorable moment for me. Here are the verses (and in my Bible, these two verses are on opposite pages):
Psalm 27:13-14
I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living.
Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD.
Psalm 31:24
Be strong and take heart, all you who hope in the LORD.
This was my commission: "Wait on Me." If I would give up law school, I would have all my heart's true desires. And God has fulfilled all His promises to me! As I sit here today I am a wife, I am a mother, I do stay home with my daughter and everyday I feel so thankful for these blessings!
The Lord has been so good to me! He called me out of a deep darkness, showed me the beauty of His truth and made me His own. I love to tell my story and I hope found encouragement in it. May we all be as good a friend to the people we met as my friend Elizabeth was to me. You never know how you might change a life with nothing but your smile and your friendship. You don’t have to do all the work--just be the one who can lead the thirsty to water.
Rev. 07-2005