Are you fucking serious??
The person who I was on the phone with was Tyler's brother, who was having girl troubles-btw, and what he know's of you isn't good.. Would you rather have had me answer "My exboyfriend.." Is that what you would rather be known as?
And telling him I was at a friends house as opposed to 'my exboyfriends' house is easier because then he would have given me shit for being there and I shouldn't have to explain myself to anyone about being at your house, or anyones house for that matter.
And you should feel respected that I'm not talking about what happens between me and other guys in detail, because I would never want to hear that from you and another girl. But since you threw the whole 'It wouldn't be the first time I helped you with problems with another guy' shit, lets not forget who you called when you and Jessica were having problems, ok-that's all I'm ever going to say about that particular situation, because I always want you to feel and know that you can come to me when shit like that happens. Because you can, and you know that. Besides, we both know we would murder any person who hurt us, and that's something I take very seriously, and into great consideration, especially on your part. Which is why I'm choosing not to tell you about what happened between Tyler and I in detail. All you need to know is I got caught up in his insecurities and its over. I'm not drowning in it anymore and I still have my friend. Which is what ultimately matters to me the most.
But for some reason you don't seem to understand that, because last night it seemed like we were having a good time, being civil and starting to become friends again. Then you send me shit about being over me and feeling a total lack of respect after having written me a letter about how you thought you were over me and us, but aren't. After hearing me say 'My friend' as opposed to 'My ex-boyfriend' or 'That dude who dumped me in August' or whatthefuckever.. Are you fucking kidding me? I'm giving you a chance to be my friend, which is what I though you wanted through all those damn messages, so why can't you take last night for what it was worth--two friends and a mom going to dinner and having a nice time..
SOOO.. Let me apologize for talking on the phone when I should have been telling you about all the things that were said, that happend and were implied between Tyler and I.. Let me apologize for being there for my friend when he was almost in tears instead of ingnoring two more of his phone calls to shove all the hurtful details into your face and potentially make you feel awful. Seriously, I'm fucking sorry.
Another thing I'm sorry about.. I'm sorry you can never make up your mind when it comes to where you and I stand. Making 'illogical' decisions in August and then telling me your having dreams about two headstones together and how you can't make me want you back. You wanted to be friends after that whole thing in August happened right? You made that decision, fucking own it. You may feel 'condemed' for something I have done before, but did you seriously think that the bullshit cycle between you and I was going to go on forever? Obviously you have no idea how serious I was this past time. Maybe you missed my tears when I was telling you that I wanted to marry you, have your kids and give you what you and your father never had when you were growing up.. Maybe they got lost in your Buffalo Chicken Salad.
That was it, kid. That was my last shot at you and I. I don't know how I could have made that any clearer. I even stopped hanging out with those kids in Mesa as much as I had in the past because I knew that it upset you. Even when Mike moved away and I decided talking to him was not worth hurting you, it still wasn't good enough for you. And nothing you did was good enough for me. You may have made the decision, but you and I are both to blame for what led up to it.
But whats the point of friendship or even contact if you're going to question everything I do or say. If you aren't going to take me seriously, because let me tell you.. Every kid that I hang out with in Mesa knows that when I say something, I mean it. That's one luxury they have that you don't. But you don't seem to want it either and that is your loss. So yeah, it does bother me when you tell me one thing and then two weeks later take it back and try to stretch this bullshit on longer than it needs to be. It does bother me that my good intentions are met with you questioning my words to a friend in need. Because I wasn't afraid or ashamed to tell him who you were, because that conversation we were having was about him and his hurt, not about you or our hurt. THATS why I said 'My friend..' because it was his turn to talk about shit he was dealing with and my turn to listen. It was his fucking turn and you're the one getting all upset. Are you fucking serious??
----------------- Original Message -----------------
Mainly when you said it was "your friend" while you were on the phone. You don't even consider me to be a friend anymore. You have told me that we're not friends anymore. It was like you didn't want someone knowing who I was. I don't know if you were either afraid or ashamed to say I was right next to you, but either way... And I'm pretty sure I sent you a text message telling you that even though it may be awkward, I'm here for you to talk to. And even as awkward as it may be, it wouldn't have been the first time I was there to talk to you when a guy did you wrong. Maybe I'm just over analyzing things. But I do think I might be over you. Unfortuanetly I can't say that'll last forever though. Or, I may just be talking out my ass though. But in any case, why should that bother you?
----------------- Original Message -----------------
Lack of respect how?
----------------- Original Message -----------------
After tonight, I do believe I am finally over you. I didn't feel disrespected at all, but I don't believe I have ever felt such a lack of respect. That pretty much sealed the deal for me. I would still like you to be there for my graduation ceremony though. But then again, that's is a long way away and that should probablly be more planned out when the time comes. Adios Nicole.
Andrew
And telling him I was at a friends house as opposed to 'my exboyfriends' house is easier because then he would have given me shit for being there and I shouldn't have to explain myself to anyone about being at your house, or anyones house for that matter.
And you should feel respected that I'm not talking about what happens between me and other guys in detail, because I would never want to hear that from you and another girl. But since you threw the whole 'It wouldn't be the first time I helped you with problems with another guy' shit, lets not forget who you called when you and Jessica were having problems, ok-that's all I'm ever going to say about that particular situation, because I always want you to feel and know that you can come to me when shit like that happens. Because you can, and you know that. Besides, we both know we would murder any person who hurt us, and that's something I take very seriously, and into great consideration, especially on your part. Which is why I'm choosing not to tell you about what happened between Tyler and I in detail. All you need to know is I got caught up in his insecurities and its over. I'm not drowning in it anymore and I still have my friend. Which is what ultimately matters to me the most.
But for some reason you don't seem to understand that, because last night it seemed like we were having a good time, being civil and starting to become friends again. Then you send me shit about being over me and feeling a total lack of respect after having written me a letter about how you thought you were over me and us, but aren't. After hearing me say 'My friend' as opposed to 'My ex-boyfriend' or 'That dude who dumped me in August' or whatthefuckever.. Are you fucking kidding me? I'm giving you a chance to be my friend, which is what I though you wanted through all those damn messages, so why can't you take last night for what it was worth--two friends and a mom going to dinner and having a nice time..
SOOO.. Let me apologize for talking on the phone when I should have been telling you about all the things that were said, that happend and were implied between Tyler and I.. Let me apologize for being there for my friend when he was almost in tears instead of ingnoring two more of his phone calls to shove all the hurtful details into your face and potentially make you feel awful. Seriously, I'm fucking sorry.
Another thing I'm sorry about.. I'm sorry you can never make up your mind when it comes to where you and I stand. Making 'illogical' decisions in August and then telling me your having dreams about two headstones together and how you can't make me want you back. You wanted to be friends after that whole thing in August happened right? You made that decision, fucking own it. You may feel 'condemed' for something I have done before, but did you seriously think that the bullshit cycle between you and I was going to go on forever? Obviously you have no idea how serious I was this past time. Maybe you missed my tears when I was telling you that I wanted to marry you, have your kids and give you what you and your father never had when you were growing up.. Maybe they got lost in your Buffalo Chicken Salad.
That was it, kid. That was my last shot at you and I. I don't know how I could have made that any clearer. I even stopped hanging out with those kids in Mesa as much as I had in the past because I knew that it upset you. Even when Mike moved away and I decided talking to him was not worth hurting you, it still wasn't good enough for you. And nothing you did was good enough for me. You may have made the decision, but you and I are both to blame for what led up to it.
But whats the point of friendship or even contact if you're going to question everything I do or say. If you aren't going to take me seriously, because let me tell you.. Every kid that I hang out with in Mesa knows that when I say something, I mean it. That's one luxury they have that you don't. But you don't seem to want it either and that is your loss. So yeah, it does bother me when you tell me one thing and then two weeks later take it back and try to stretch this bullshit on longer than it needs to be. It does bother me that my good intentions are met with you questioning my words to a friend in need. Because I wasn't afraid or ashamed to tell him who you were, because that conversation we were having was about him and his hurt, not about you or our hurt. THATS why I said 'My friend..' because it was his turn to talk about shit he was dealing with and my turn to listen. It was his fucking turn and you're the one getting all upset. Are you fucking serious??
----------------- Original Message -----------------
Mainly when you said it was "your friend" while you were on the phone. You don't even consider me to be a friend anymore. You have told me that we're not friends anymore. It was like you didn't want someone knowing who I was. I don't know if you were either afraid or ashamed to say I was right next to you, but either way... And I'm pretty sure I sent you a text message telling you that even though it may be awkward, I'm here for you to talk to. And even as awkward as it may be, it wouldn't have been the first time I was there to talk to you when a guy did you wrong. Maybe I'm just over analyzing things. But I do think I might be over you. Unfortuanetly I can't say that'll last forever though. Or, I may just be talking out my ass though. But in any case, why should that bother you?
----------------- Original Message -----------------
Lack of respect how?
----------------- Original Message -----------------
After tonight, I do believe I am finally over you. I didn't feel disrespected at all, but I don't believe I have ever felt such a lack of respect. That pretty much sealed the deal for me. I would still like you to be there for my graduation ceremony though. But then again, that's is a long way away and that should probablly be more planned out when the time comes. Adios Nicole.
Andrew